True Porn Clerk Stories

This has already been blogged in a lot of places already, but I just got around to reading this diary of a young women who works at a video rental store that deals in porn videos. She's very funny and astute, and she ought to write a book about her adventures.

I couldn't tell you what makes a dirtbag. It's like obscenity: you know it when you see it. If I had to put it into a word, I'd go with "shiftiness". Dirtbags are trying to do something wrong and deep down in their dried-up little dirtbag souls they know it and somehow their mental can-I-get-away-with-this? calculations show. One guy actually has shifty eyes. I couldn't believe it – I'd always thought that that was one of those Victorian techniques for recognizing the Criminal Type, but damned if it isn't true. I was stunned when Mr. Creepy came up to the counter, claiming that an entire stack of porn he'd rented should be free because somehow the clerk had given him six wrong tapes, and there were his eyes, shifting shifting shifting around like beady, guilty little gnats, looking at anything in the room but me or the incriminating videos.

Link Discuss