The fun-lovin' computer scientists at the University of Manitoba in Winnipeg held a funeral for their retired 47-year-old IBM 650 mainframe, Betelgeuse. The festivities included pallbearers who carried the machine out onto the frozen, snowy lawn, a brass band that played a mournful New Orleans style Amazing Grace during the procession (and broke into joyous Down by the Riverside when it was over), and an hilarious eulogy that was greatly appreciated by the attendees, many of whom sported prodigious, Unix-grade facial hair.
For forty-seven years you've served us well, you cast us in your
green spell. You processed transactions without complaint, we've asked
the Pope to make you a saint.
The users you were always able to please, with a little training they
could enter with ease, all the data they needed in 2 or 3 screens
instead of the 57 in VIP.
And getting data was easy in IMS, there were six hundred reports in
the RS. And Finance was easy with FRGLA, in the time when the
mainframe held sway.
I suffer from mild RSI: a warning to stop, but one that goes away when I do stop. The trigger is using a mouse for extended periods. The alternatives for general everyday computer use aren’t great for my work habits, which center on precise pointing and clicking, so I’m in the bad habit of mousing […]
I got one of those bug-zapping LED lightbulbs, in hopes of murdering the flies drifting into my office during the increasingly warm and muggy Pennsylvania summer. I got mine from Home Depot, but the bulbs at Lowes, Wal-Mart and Amazon are all obviously identical. There are two lights in each bulb: an ultraviolet one inside […]
Did you buy a useless $400 “smart” juicer and now feel the need to accessorize it with more extrusions from the Internet of Shit timeline? Then The Leaf from Teaforia is just the thing: it’s a tea-maker that uses DRM-locked tea-pods to brew tea in your kitchen so you don’t have to endure the hassle […]
If you struggle to get a good night’s rest, consider replacing your pillows before dropping hundreds on a new mattress. You can give your tired neck a break with a 2-pack of memory foam pillows, available now in the Boing Boing Store.Each of these pillows is stuffed with cooling polyurethane foam that molds to your […]
Although flagship smartphones are unlikely to adopt heavy-duty outer casing anytime soon, you can always prepare your device for the outdoors with a beefy case and and an external battery like this Nomad Tile Trackable PowerPack, available in the Boing Boing Store for $119.95.The Nomad Tile can fully recharge an iPhone 7 over three times […]
Even though credit cards now feature an EMV chip for securing transactions, they still have to include the magnetic strip for compatibility with older point of sale systems. Because of this, there’s no way for the chip’s new security capabilities to protect against card skimmers in the wild.How do you protect yourself from legacy-technology-induced fraud? […]