That’s two things that have resonated with me on the page – the someone-is wrong-on-the-internet cartoon and this statement.

I am the world’s worst housewife, and I am a sufferer from serial distraction disorder. Someone is coming to see me, and so my eye strays from the screen and realises that I am living in a room scattered with books, photographs, half-finished family trees, crates with miscellaneous objects, shoes and jumpers that have migrated from the children’s rooms, dog hair in wafting dunes under the furniture and a thin scattering of dust overall.

*Of course* I start with the photographs, realise that I have previously sorted out some pictures for my album which are still waiting for me to stick them in, and I while away a happy hour sticking the pictures in the album until I realise that this is the picture of Aunt Nellie that I intended to keep in the family history folder (because I am trying to keep an archive picture of each person) and so it is natural to collect up the photographs and stuff them in a box file and move onto the family trees which I got halfway through and then abandoned, but which really ought to be finished off, except that I go to find a pencil sharpener and realise the sink is full of dirty cups and stop to do that. There’s no hot water so I go upstairs, taking with me the assortment of things which have been put in a crate (or really, the too-hard basket, because I don’t know what that black piece of moulded plastic is, I only know that as soon as I discard it I will find out…and didn’t we throw away the board game which used those bright little bobbles?) and so it is that I can have worked really intensively and still have made more mess than I have cleared up in the course of a morning.

And of course now I have a new hobby, surplus wire macrame. It’s green, very green….

I don’t know – because it would look bad?