*ooouph!*

One of my favorite movie bits ever.

http://www.guidehorse.com/sneakers_horses.htm

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9BBqgMQluDM

:)

By myself, I wouldn’t have no boss
‘Cause I’d be raisin’ my lonely dental floss
Raisin’ my lonely dental floss

Well I just might grow me some bees
But I’d leave the sweet stuff
For somebody else…
But then, on the other hand I might
Keep the wax
N’ melt it down
Pluck some floss
N’ swish it aroun’

And I’d have me a crop
An’ it’d be on top (that’s why I’m movin’ to Montana)

Movin’ to Montana soon
Gonna be a dental floss tycoon (yes I am)
Movin’ to Montana soon
Gonna be a mental-toss flycoon
(whatever that is)
Oh lookout!

I’m pluckin’ the ol’ dental floss
That’s growin’ on the prairie
Pluckin’ the floss!
I plucked all day an’ all night an’ all
Afternoon…

Oh I’m ridin’ a small tiny hoss
(His name is MIGHTY LITTLE)
He’s a good hoss
Even though he’s a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or blanket on anyway
He’s a bit dinky to strap a big saddle or blanket on anyway
But anyway…

I’m pluckin’ the ol’ dental floss
Even if you think it is a little silly, folks
I don’t care if you think it’s silly, folks
I don’t care if you think it’s silly, folks

I’m gonna find me a horse
Just about this big
An’ ride that sucker all along the borderline
With a pair of heavy-duty
Zircon-encrusted tweezers in my hand
Every other wrangler would say
I was mighty grand
But by myself I wouldn’t have no boss
‘Cause I’d be raisin’ my lonely dental floss

Raisin’ my lonely dental floss
Raisin’ my lonely dental floss

Well I might ride along the border
With my tweezers gleamin’ in the moon-lighty night
And then I’d get a cuppa coffee
N’ give my foot a push…
Just me ‘n the pygmy pony
Over by the dental floss bush

And then I might just jump back on
An’ ride like a cowboy (dipshit)
Into the dawn to Montana

Movin’ to Montana soon
(Yippy-Ty-O-Ty-Ay)
Movin’ to Montana soon…

hmmm, I don’t know. I think the horse is doing ok in the uncontrollably part, but Failing in the disruptive part. I just don’t think this qualifies as amok. Maybe if he knocked over a couple of those other handlers, and got a few other ponys running around he’d have his disruption cred.

So in closing I’ll give that horse a decent frenzy, but no amok.

That sounds like a job for Whiplash!

If I were forced to listen to progressive rock, use buckets for shoes and speak only in adverbs while being cattle-prodded I’d run away too.

Now that we’re both done talking about things that would make us personally run away… I’m guessing you’re commenting on why the horse was running.

For all you know, the horse’s owners gently massage it’s hooves as he sits on a 1,000 thread count pillow, leisurely eating steel cut oats flown in fresh daily.

I mean… it’s a horse show. They probably treat the animals the same way the dog owners from dog shows treat their pets… which is to say, better than anyone of us has been treated by another human being.

You really think they have him pulling the worlds tiniest plow in the worlds tiniest field to grow the worlds tiniest corn?

No, but I really want to believe it. I also want him to take kittens on hayrides.

For all of your monkey on horse cravings, may I present Steve Martin’s rendition of Marty Robbins’ El Paso:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCP3wKTajsU

Steve Martin opens the video riding in on a tiny horse and there are several monkeys on tiny horses (and donkeys?) around the 3:15 mark. There’s some great moments involving an elephant too.

That’s demented…. wait did you say “kittens on hayrides”??

I’m sorry, no that is cute.

For a second there I though you said “Draw and quarter Gummi Bears”.

The thoroughbred of sin, Sijay.

From this moment on: “I wanna’ mini mini mini horse!!!”

I laughed, I cried, it was better than Cats…