/ Mark Frauenfelder / 8:41 am Mon Dec 22, 2008

Extreme poodle grooming

poodle-grooming.gif

Josh Bearman posted some photos of poodles groomed almost beyond recognition.

71

  1. You really have to hate your dog in order to inflict it with such an orrendouscity. Why not simply parade it with a sandwich board advertising cat food?

  2. I mean really. Just grow a topiary. That dog has a “just kill me” expression that breaks my heart. And makes me want to punch that woman in the face.

  3. I have nothing but contempt for people who abuse their animals in this fashion (or any fashion). Seriously, you dyed your dog? What do you do to your kids?

    Take their animals away and prevent them from ever again owning pets. Please.

    Attention morons of the world: Don’t try to make your pet all about you.

  5. Seriously, you dyed your dog? What do you do to your kids?

    Put adult makeup on them and submit them to beauty pageants?

    These people obviously want to be craftsy; but why submit the poor living creature to it? Just make some paier mache or origami or something.

  10. You can’t just blame the woman, however. Look at all those awards and cover articles — clearly there’s some twisted subculture that we’re barely on the surface of here.

  12. I don’t really see how this is abuse – it’s silly and pointless, but a poodle doesn’t have much dignity to start with, and what it does have, it’s not aware of.

    It’s not like they’re adding or subtracting limbs or something. Though an eight-legged spiderpoo would be pretty awesome.

  14. That is wrong in so many ways. I have a miniature poodle (who belches most impressively, btw) and I don’t even get the regular “fancy” cuts. The most extreme thing I’ve ever done is have a little mohawk on her, instead of the typical poodle topknot.

    Usually, she is either rather sheep-like in her curliness (winter) or shaved and scrawny (summer).

  15. I love how the woman has a really bad hair style in every picture.

    Is it the same person? I thought they were different women but looked frightingly alike…

  16. I don’t grant that it’s abuse. The dog doesn’t have any style sense, and really doesn’t much care… if anything, it probably likes the attention. (Being groomed means you have decent status in the pack.)

    And it should be remembered that the classic poodle cut originated as a working-dog cut — odd but functional.

    Re #3: Kids do this sort of thing to themselves. And many parents do try to dress/style their kids.

    I do think that anyone who pursues this particular artform needs to Get A Life and think about what this says to the world about their own (lack of) sense of style. But that’s my reaction to many non-utilitarian crafts. I’m sure they’d say the same thing about some of my hobbies.

  18. Abuse? Isn’t that a _bit_ of an overreaction? If anything, I would just call it tacky–not that the dog would notice that. I’m pretty sure this dog feels the same about getting groomed this way as any dog feels about getting clipped, brushed, and fluffed for a dog show. They bleach tear stains and pluck wrong color hairs in regular grooming too. It’s not like it’s going to offend the dog’s sense of taste. My dog eats poo.

  21. We are supposed to be shepherds of our animal dependents. Looks like this shepherd got into the vodka. I don’t think the dog is being abused per se, but if I were that dog (and believe me there are times when I do feel like one), I’d rather be somewhere else and maybe with a different shepherd.

  22. warning:the following comment probably contains sarcasm.

    What kind of person post a picture like that! What kind of sick mind would do that to a poor defenseless animal, I had to look. and now I’m scarred.
    end:sarcasm

    Non sarcastic comment:
    Let me get back to you later on that.
    I’m still working on it.
    but nothing is coming to mind.

  24. Hang on overeactors.

    Look at it from the dogs perspective –

    constant grooming
    good food
    attention from strangers
    lots of time with people

    For plenty of dogs that is a perfect life.

  25. natural dogs are happy dogs. Happy dogs come from good packs, not good human families. If you can “see” with your nose as good as primates see with their eyes, what does soap and perfume all over you (and chemical dyes) do?

  29. My 3.5 year old daughter, who loves princesses and ballet, thinks the dog looks like a snail and is cute. ‘Nuff said.

  31. It’s amazing to me to see people treat dogs as anything more than retarded. Dignity? Style? A “just kill me” “look” on its face? I guess that’s better than the “not another episode of ‘According To Jim'” “look” your pets give you, or the “should you really be buying maple syrup while you’re on a diet?” “look” that dogs (dogs!) have been “known” to “give.”

    Dogs don’t care. And no, I’m not saying the retarded humans among us don’t deserve dignity (or style).

  32. Maybe just maybe the groomer isn’t really tweaking
    on some really potent hallucinogenics when she does this.
    BUT–What if someone WAS when they SAW this?

  35. Forget sixties instrumental hits like Telstar and compressors for audio recording, what Joe Meek was really about was Shampoo. Wash Your Poodle!

  36. what does soap and perfume all over you (and chemical dyes) do?

    due to the wonders of the epidermis, soap and perfume do very very very little.

    Also, kindly prove those are chemical dyes please Takuan, or that the dog is perfumed? Dollars to donuts thedyes are perfectly edible and you’re projecting the perfume from some repressed emotional space you’re in. ;) -winkies-

  37. @ #16:
    “The dog doesn’t have any style sense, and really doesn’t much care… if anything, it probably likes the attention.”

    Ok, so lets take the autistic kids and the disabled kids and the palsied kids and shave their heads and dye them all pink and purple and make them look like alice in wonderland dioramas. They’ll like the attention! They can’t tell the difference between being laughed with or laughed at, so why should we care? Blind people don’t have any style sense so lets dress them up like clowns!

    Just because it’s a dog, or a cat or any other animal doesn’t mean it doesn’t deserve some modicum of dignity and respect. I wouldn’t do to a dog what I wouldn’t do to a person.

    @#31:
    “Dogs don’t care. And no, I’m not saying the retarded humans among us don’t deserve dignity (or style).”

    Actually, I think that IS what you’re saying, see:
    “It’s amazing to me to see people treat dogs as anything more than retarded.” After which you illustrate through sarcasm how dogs are incapable of actually caring how they look or what you do. So that makes a comparison to “retards” saying that they deserve the same dignity and respect as dogs do, so by extension, it’s ok to paint up the “retards” and put them on display for everyone to ooh and ahh over how pretty you made your “retarded” kid.

    Whether they care or not, or even whether they’re capable of caring or not, shouldn’t have the slightest bit of bearing on how they’re treated, be they disabled children, adults, pets, dogs, your neighbor, anyone.

    If you wouldn’t do it to a creature who could say no, don’t do it to one that can’t.

  38. #23: Websearch “lion cut”. Which can also be a perfectly functional cut, making a long-furred cat much more comfortable in hot weather without shaving the areas the cat is most likely to object to having handled… but which looks silly as all get-out.

  39. Not to mention that the woman in these photographs and who appears to own a grooming salon, likely is a crazy animal person who would never expose these animals to danger. She thinks (hopes) they’re show champs people, why would she want to make them sick? This is to say: she probably treats these animals with more care than most, possibly more than you do yours.

  40. #37: We agree that we respectfully disagree. I don’t grant that dog is equivalent to child, in general. Individual dog, for individual human, maybe.

    But… Well, I have no trouble with the concept that the same species can be used as working animal, pet, and food supply — though the same individual is probably not all of these at once! — and I would classify this particular instance as being a working animal. It’s really no worse than what we ask fashion models to parade around in.

    Your milage varies; that’s fine too.

  46. My eleven year old daughter with tourqoiuse hair who wants more piercings for Christmas said “eew gross”.
    Go figure, I thought they were sort of cool , reminded me of “Duck Amuck”. That woman looks like she drinks a little too much coffee though.

    Poodles are actually pretty smart for dogs, smart enough to know that silly humans who want to groom them beats working for a living , or getting eaten.

  47. Dogs do not have a sense of dignity. If the HUMANS that are looking at the dog react disrespectfully, that is in the realm of HUMAN behavior and has nothing to do with the dog. The dog does not care on way or the other as long as it has food, shelter and love. If YOU feel it is demeaning and ridiculous, that is YOUR interpretation, do not confuse it with the dog’s opinion.

  50. BTW, that dog has survived to become but one of the .1% of species that has avoided extinction to remain viable (in no small part because of its 15,000 year relationship with humans) in this, the year 2008.

    Right about now, if his ancestors could but see that all of their scratching, clawing, suffering, and enduring to advance up the evolutionary chain of life would lead to that garish eyesore, I’m not so sure they would be pleased.

  51. One more thing…

    Extreme ironing?

    +

    Extreme poodle grooming?

    =

    Next hot Internet meme.

    You’re welcome.

  53. Oh, hell, poodles don’t care in the LEAST what you do to them when you groom ’em. We’ve been doing it forever, and they probably now have some sort of ancestral memory of grooming tables and leave-in conditioner embedded in their brains.

    Do this to a german shepherd, though, and you’ll get your face ripped off.

    1. I probably should have created a sock puppet to admit this, but I have retextured and retinted several cats. It was the 80s. What can I say?

  55. No dignity?

    I remember reading that poodles were actually bred to hunt leopards.

    Compare that level of dignity to your average football hooligan.

    And I’d just like to see this woman have to answer to Anubis.

    “You did WHAT??”

  56. Groomers that dye their dogs, horse, cats and at least one ferret use Manic Panic.

    Dawn Omboy at the top of the page makes an excellent case (as does this groomer) for not having the human in themed costume.

    I saw a pink poodle in San Diego. The owner used Kool-Ade. Dog seemed to not care.

    Not for me, but not animal abuse.

    Thanks, Takuan, for declaring an end to the “retard” remarks.

  58. Oh please….this is not ABUSE! Not even close! The owner was having some fun with her poodle. Many poodles enjoy being “poodled up” –uh, how DO YOU KNOW they don’t?? and trust me this poodle…is loved, and extremely well cared for. . .accuse the owner of “showing off” if you must–but don’t dilute the real problem of animal abuse by putting this in the same category.

  62. I’m in agreement that the human in that cover picture is in need of grooming herself but more importantly, she needs to get that dead animal off of her neck. That’s heinous!

  63. Boingers:
    I just have to say, it is a fascinating study in human psychology to read the comments in this thread. I laughed several times while reading. Very entertaining.

    My slant: Dogs don’t care about whether they are pink or natural, trimmed a certain way or not, or anything else in the way of ‘style’. To think that they do is the height of human silliness. Imputing such feelings to an animal is absurd. Dogs can feel humiliated or saddened, but it is not because of their ‘styling’. It is through real abuse like yelling at them or physical pain.

    Reality is that these creatures are animals and, given just the right psychological trigger and circumstances, will (and all too often do) enthusiastically rip you open and eat your flesh without the slightest second thought or remorse. If they felt human-like humiliation they would not openly lick their genitals, sniff at one anothers’ anuses and copulate in public.

    While these folks who groom their pets like this strike me as a eccentric and have way too much free time on their hands, I know that they probably love their beasts mightily and would never think of harming them.

    I think the only thing being abused here is the delicate sensibilities of silly humans who imput human feelings to animals and have somewhat lost touch with reality.

  64. can always tell those who have never shared their life with animals. They used to be able to publicly maintain “animals don’t feel pain”. That changed, hopefully the trend will continue.

    I do have the concern that total inability to share empathy with other species is frequently an indicator of inability to share empathy within a species.

    I haven’t killed my own food in while, but if I did, I’ll still feel for it as I did it.

  65. Good lord. The extreme grooming is ridiculous but it’s NOT abuse.

    Abuse is moving and leaving your animal locked in your home with no food or water to starve to death because no one knows it’s there.

    Abuse is pouring gasoline on a dog and setting it on fire.

    Abuse is taking a perfectly healthy year-old dog to the vet to have it put down because you don’t want it anymore. And when informed that the vet will not put a healthy animal down, shrugging and announcing that you’ll just go home and shoot it instead.

    Abuse is leaving a dog along a rural road because you don’t want it anymore and you can’t be bothered to take it to a shelter. A Pekinese can totally fend for itself in the NC mountains, right?

    Abuse is throwing a box of live kittens into a dumpster.

    These are all examples that I personally know about. And there’s plenty more.

    Let’s have some perspective, please. The poodle is obviously a show dog and the owner is no going to use poisonous dyes. The dog may enjoy the grooming process; I don’t know. I could never get my poodle to stay still for that kind of work but then again, she’s a butter-stealing, trash-diving, unrepentant little belchmonster who rips the little bows off her ears when she comes back from the groomer. But even if I did do something like this to her, it wouldn’t be abuse. A sign to get a better hobby, perhaps. But not abuse.

  66. No, it isn’t “abuse” like throwing a bag of kittens into a burning building filled with starving pythons is “abuse”. I get that. There is something wrong about extreme grooming, though. My reaction to this kind of grooming is similar to my reaction to preschool beauty pagents. It might not be “abuse”, but it aint right.

  67. yup, it’s fine to entertain whatever sick, twisted, dark fantasies of unspeakable horror and bendy rubber stuff you wish – in the confines of your cranial vault/and/or/complex, but manifesting them on another living thing?

  68. Exactly. Essentially this woman is practicing her weird fetish (“I like to make things look like other things!”) on a being that cannot give its consent. But since she’s not putting her cigars out on it, it must not be abuse.

  69. You people are looking at a professional journal for dog groomers. As in many professions, competitions are held to exhibit superior skills and determine who is the best in their field. The grooming shown here is extreme because it is at a high level of competition. It is the norm. Vegetable dyes are used to create these effects which does not harm the dog and the shampoos are actually better quality than what most people use. Poodles are used to being groomed because their coats require daily maintenance so for this dog, it’s all in a day’s work. I agree that the dog probably enjoys it – my dog does and will come when I call “brush” – and a little perspective is needed here.

  70. Well it’s all fine and dandy to compare this to a children’s beauty pageant… but I think it’s more like Halloween, and look at how much kids LOVE that! They plan their costumes for months and can’t wait to dress up! Plus that dog gets 2 hours of undivided attention while it’s being groomed. How would any dog not love that!? Oh, and for those of you complaining that the owner inflicts this on the dogs when they should be dressing up themselves, google search for more pictures than just this one owner (yes, it’s a whole competition with several people and poodles who enter). Most of the owners dress in costumes to match their dogs! While I think it’s ridiculous and a waste of time, and I only looked it up in the first place because someone told me it was funny, I think its sad that a harmless pastime which is enjoyed by kooky people and their dogs is harassed by people who don’t even know what they’re talking about.

Comments are closed.