Sex doll bandit
A Cairns, Australia gentleman burglarized three adult shops, stealing blow-up sex dolls called "Jungle Jane" and having sex with them in an alley. Police have collected evidence, including DNA. From Reuters:
"It's totally bizarre. It's a real concern that someone like that is out on the street," said one of the owners of the adult sex shops in Cairns in northern Queensland state."Police seek blow-up doll sex bandit"
"He has been taking the dolls out the back and blowing them up and using the dolls and leaving them in the alley," the owner, who gave the name of Vogue, told the Cairns Post newspaper.
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So some weirdo out there has a fetish for two-headed cow sex dolls?!
I enjoyed the title of this post more than the post itself.
Sex doll bandit = Two-headed calf.
Totally.
Had the two-headed calf been stealing sex dolls? If not, the title is very misleading.
So the two headed calf stole a sex doll? Is that why they put it down.
I'm confused, is this a sex doll in the shape of a two-headed calf, or did the two-headed calf steal a normally-shaped sex doll?
Methinks we have a sex doll bandit blog post bandit on our hands.
"Two heads are better than one! No Waiting!"
NOOOOOO! My Sex Doll!
Awwwww, how cute!!!
Excellent post title mishap. But, RIP two-headed calf indeed. :(
Sex doll bandits killing two-headed calves. When will the madness end?
NEVAR FOGET!
How and where do I buy one of those? I want to be the first to have one on my block!!!!
Ooops. : ) Then again, maybe I shouldn't have fixed it.
In other unrelated news, a serial Sex Bandit was euthanized late Thursday night.
“These bandits seldom survive.”
Cowrotica, beefy
The old news story:
Damnit, how are we supposed to survive world war three without two-headed cows to preduce rad-free milk?
The new news story:
Technically less wierd than the guys who have sex with store mannequins.
Unboxing pics or gtfo!
This is like a bizarre combo of a couple of Frank Zappa songs "Miss Pinky" and "The Illinois Enema Bandit." I leave it to you to google the lyrics if you are unfamiliar and are so inclined. We could have almost added a Roky Erickson song, but that was fixed. Life imitates art, given time.
phikus! whatup dawg! howza bout a little "artificial rhonda" with the plastic pie?
Sex Doll Bandits. Time to get the band together again.
Minty: ...Or Rover's Reemer, if you want to get into the really obscure Zappa referential memes that are on topic...
Expect to hear from paleo-conservatives soon that this is a symptom of legalizing gay marriage.
My teachers in high school always said "When choosing a career, just pick what you love doing most and find a way to make that your career."
This guy apparently took them too literally.
Sex in an alley? How declasse. At least some people know how to treat their sex dolls with the respect they deserve.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=296Nvufy-aY
"Jungle Jane"? I hope that's an allusion to the works of Edgar Rice Burroughs. Otherwise, WTF Australia.
(Sorry, this cold weather is making my PC knee-jerk act up.)
Speaking of sex dolls....2 words: Faye Reagan. That girl is like a sexdoll come to life. Yowza!
This is what I found when I googled for the doll:
http://www.bigskyballoons.com/images/Balloons/Jungle_jane.jpg
Is it the right doll?
"Jungle Jane"? have police questioned R. Crumb yet?
Relax people, eventually he'll find "the one" and they'll get married and settle down and inflate a few kids.
ididntdoit
Why is it so hard to catch the guy?
He steals the doll, then goes out into the back alley, blows it up and has sex with it. Seems like that would take some time to me.
Unless he carries an air pump around with him.
3 sad dolls left out in the alley. sad sad sad.
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