Victorious Mongoose 1902a Concealable Ray Pistol

Limited to 400 units, here's the Victorious Mongoose 1902a Concealable Ray Pistol.

Augmenting security with discretion, the Victorious Mongoose has been purposely produced at just over half the size of the earlier wave weapons, while still packing the punch of its big-boned counterparts. Snugly nestled in an unbearably dashing leather-embossed and satin-lined case, the world's first concealable ray pistol is at last upon us in complete and flawless glory.

Our much cherished pocket-size atomiser – the world's first concealable ray pistol and the fourth in Doctor Grordbrort's line of infallible aether oscillators – will become available for your fine and capable hands to clasp and fondle at will in July this year. With an edition size of a mere 400, this punchy little nipper will be flying off the shelves like a cash-eating flying fish attacking your wallet – and those of you who have had the privilege of such a rare encounter will know what curious jollies are to be had there. You know who you are.

It's US$535.50.

• [howaboutthisdangit]

  At that price, I hope it comes with a guarantee that it will, indeed, vaporize any monsters from space that it is directed toward.

• [Frank W]

  I must grudgingly admit that this is steampunk done right.

• [Bemopolis]

  Screw the gun, where’s the action shot of it wielded by Miss Leila Phantom?

• [Michael]

  That … that is the first useless very expensive thing that I have actually felt the need to spend lots of money on. But no — I could buy a three-bedroom bungalow in Detroit for that.

• [Ernunnos]

  Yow. For that price you could buy a modern reproduction of a Colt 1911 that shoots real .45 slugs. And looks nearly as steampunk, with the right grips.

• [sepdxbill]

  I work for the distributor of these spiffy art pieces/replicas. One we shipped to a customer in Canada was stuck in customs due to a regulatory delay. I had to repeatedly explain to the customs official that the device was non-functioning and could not actually shoot lasers. She was quite skeptical, but eventually we were able to get it cleared.

• [rabbitfnord]

  I’ll be hiding mine in mine in my Jacksey!
  Love it.
  If only I had $535.50 to spare.
  Pew PEW PEW!

• [mmbb]

  small print: actual rays not included, sold separately.

• [kingzilch]

  “Unbearably Dashing” is my new favorite phrase.

• [Mojave]

  Agree with #1…it needs a laser in it for the full effect. Why go 99 percent of the way when a red or green laser would get you over the finish line…

• [eustace]

  Dr. Grordbrort’s Aether Oscillators have defined steampunk since they first appeared – any new model is cause for celebration.
  As for disgusting weapon names, no one has yet mentioned my favorite, the loogie gun from Neal Stephanson’s Snowcrash. I hope never to experience one.

• [flyingdutchman]

  Now let’s see what happens when you try to board a plane with one of these in your luggage…

• [Takuan]

  for that price they could put a half watt laser in it.

• [TJ S]

  With writing like that, I’m almost willing to pay the high price.

• [Takuan]

  remember the Noisy Cricket?
  http://www.yourprops.com/norm-45a6fe10011fe-Men+in+Black+II+(2002).jpeg

• [Takuan]

  a weapon name contest?

• [Takuan]

  Spider Robinson had the Cross ‘bo and the disgusting Snot Gun..

• [thievedrelic]

  does it at least make nausea-inducing ‘wooo wooo’ noises when you discharge it?

• [WeightedCompanionCube]

  Spider Jerusalem had the ultrasonic bowel disruptor. Went all the way up to “prolapse” and left no traceable signature.

• [Capissen]

  @Takuan/WeightedCompanionCube

  I was thinking more along the lines of the much-sought-after Lassiter:

  http://www.fireflywiki.org/Firefly/Lassiter

• [nigelstwin]

  I don’t remember where I read it – probably in high school – but I always thought the “particle projection potato” was a good choice.

  And yes, that’s a smart looking little blaster.