Speed Bong Bottle Opener


17 Responses to “Speed Bong Bottle Opener”

  1. Citizen_Simplex says:

    What the heck is going on in that picture? Is that guy wearing some kinda plastic face mask?

  2. madzack says:

    he’s wasting a lot of beer.

  3. absimiliard says:

    Oh come on LightningRose, Guiness comes in cans. And it’s definitely Real Beer.

    (In fact it’s so “Real” that it kicks sand in the face of those wimpy “don’t need a knife and a fork to drink it” beers when it sees them at the beach.)

    -abs does have to admit that while canned Guinness is better than anything Bud EVER made in their lives it is inferior to Guinness from the tap, and any Guinness in America is so watered down compared to what it ought to be that the whole nation is just clueless on what it really tastes like

  4. Jarvik7 says:

    I thought the beer was supposed to go IN your mouth when you shotgunned…

  5. nutbastard says:

    because no one ever has a pointy object on their keychain…

  6. technosomething says:

    link target broken but found product here: http://foolishgadgets.com/200903/skull-speed-bong-bottle-opener/

  7. David Pescovitz says:

    CITIZEN_SIMPLEX@1, Weird, right!?

  8. Quiet Noises says:

    Real men bite the can open. And real men don’t waste that much.

  9. razordaze says:

    @5: Real men don’t need tools to shotgun a beer, they use their bare hands.

  10. Gilbert Wham says:

    Bah. At first I thought this was a meth pipe with a bottle-opener attachment.

  11. Agies says:

    Any beer of shotgunning quality cannot be wasted.

    Also I question the validity of advertising copy that can’t draw the distinction between a beer bong (a funnel and plastic tube) and shotgunning a beer (what the picture illustrates). They are two distinct uses for cheap foul-smelling beer. The next thing you know they will be calling it a keg stand. Some people…

  12. Dangerpants says:

    That is CLEARLY not a beer bong. A beer bong consists of a funnel and a hose.

    What that man is doing so poorly is called shotgunning.

    Also #2 – it looks more like he’s wasting a lot of Pepsi.

  13. Fred H says:

    Props for the eyes lighting up, but wither the evil laughter everytime you use it? If they’ve gone this far……….

  14. LightningRose says:

    I forgot about Guinness. I stand corrected.

  15. LightningRose says:

    Real beer doesn’t come in cans.

  16. Bray_beast says:

    Pretty sure that’s a Miller Lite.

  17. David Pescovitz says:

    DANGERPANTS @8, Yes, that’s why in my description, I referred to “shotgunning.”

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