Subivor subway emergency kit for terrorist attacks

Over at the BAMIntelBlog, Danny Loschiavo posts about the Subivor Subway Emergency Kit. It's basically a fanny pack with stuff that supposedly will help you out if you're in the subway during a terrorist attack. The kit is $39.99 and includes a free tote bag and, er, Metro card holder. Here's what the Subivor contains:

1 - SURVIVAL MASK disposable anti-fog full facemask, protects against Toxic Smoke,Concrete Dust, Debris, Radio Active Dirty Bomb, Influenza, Small Pox, and Anthrax.

1 - 3 1/2 inch Flashlight

1 - 7 inch Orange Pry bar

1 - Silver tone Metal Whistle

1 - Orange Moist Towelette Pouch

1 - Compact Bag

Subivor

David Pescovitz is Boing Boing's co-editor/managing partner. He's also a research director at Institute for the Future. On Instagram, he's @pesco.

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creativeBAM

Does it come with strawberry scented moist towelettes? I would prefer it to orange.

How about a pack for Air Planes?

parachute
helmet
plastic crow bar
and a shirt that says:

“Paranoia drives my decisions”
Joe Trainer

Can we order these in different colors? It’s embarrassing when your outfit clashes with your accessories on the coroner’s slab.
f sharp a sharp infinity

I do not understand, there are no miniature american flags in this kit.
monstrinho_do_biscoito

for my kit, i’d pick…

water,
money,
some sort of multitool, leatherman, etc.
Anonymous

I’m an actual subway driver . . . here’s what I think . . .

The “survival mask” looks like one from a hospital. If the train is burning or there is toxic gas, it won’t help.

Flashlight- good, we have those too

Pry bar- if I saw somebody with one of these, I would assume it’s a weapon. My next step would be to call about you on the radio.

Whistle- good, we have those too. Sometimes it’s the only way to attract attention in a noisy environment or from a long distance.

Moist towelettes- we use those, too. Everything in the tunnel is dirty with brake dust.

I’ve thought of buying a surplus gas mask but it would probably freak passengers out if they saw me wearing it.
Deidzoeb

The facemask also acts as birth control and can be folded inside-out to reveal your new deed to the Brooklyn Bridge. It plays a mean bass. Step right up.

No, seriously, it protects against breathing boulders. Boulders would be too large to pass through a standard facemask, so they could list that too.
Daemon

On top of other flaws, it’s seriously overpriced.
nicolaicam

For an actual subway emergency kit (or car emergency kit) you want to have a glass-breaking hammer, which is a small one with a very hard (not particularly sharp) point to cause toughened or laminated glasses to craze so you can kick the pieces out and escape. The baby pry thingy there isn’t going to do much.
Anonymous

Looks to me like this kind of kit would get you handcuffed and thrown in jail if you were searched.
nutbastard

i’m a bit skeptical about that mask. actually i’m completely unbelieving – protection against radiation? you mean that stuff that absorbs through your skin, that no amount of conventional clothing can protect against?

and really, moist towlettes? because you might be in a terrorist attack in a subway, but that’s no reason you can’t be fresh and clean for lunch?
- Antinous / Moderator
  
  protection against radiation
  
  Ambient radiation – bad. Inhaling radioactive particles – the gift that keeps on giving.
David Pescovitz

Indeed!
vxnerve

As a former Marine with 3 combat tours, years of training and dozens of real world “survival situations” to draw upon, I felt compelled to take a look at the Subivor and offer my two cents (because I wouldn’t pay two cents for it). Oh, I’m also NBC (Nuclear Biological and Chemical trained…among other things). I may take a bit of time to comment on the obvious flaws with this kit in a bit for now let’s talk about the three things that are really going to keep you alive in any disaster/survival situation. These should be obvious to anyone with a few marbles clanking around in their brain-housing group.

1. Knowledge
2. Training
3. Luck

During survival training we were continually drilled with the following acronym and it ALWAYS works (assuming you’re still breathing) and it doesn’t even need a kit or a go-bag to implement.

SURVIVAL

S – Size up the situation
U – Undue haste makes waste
R – Realize where you are
V – Value your life
I – Improvise
V – Vanquish fear and panic
A – Act like the natives
L – Live by your wits

With the above in mind you still only have the framework for action (prevailing directives). Without proper training and practical application (to the point muscle memory kicks in) you’re still going to be compromised. Before buying anything to assist in your survival I would first become informed and learned. Knowledge is power. Repetition yields clarity in duress. And if you’re number is up, it’s up. PERIOD.

Ok, so let’s poke some more fun at the Subivor.

Survival Mask – doesn’t protect against carbon monoxide (most fire deaths are attributed to this BTW). One of the examples used on the site for this product is the Sarin gas attack in Japan…sorry but unless you’re in MOPP4 you don’t have a chance of surviving a serious NBC event. Though I haven’t tested the mask, I have to wonder how you would be able to blow the cool silver tone metal whistle if wearing the mask.

Pry bars are used to pry and you’re not going to get much leverage off of seven inches. I also seriously doubt it has enough concentrated mass to break any type of tempered glass. Also, how would you hold it to take a swing? I see some hurt hands out there.

Flashlight – Duh.

Orange Moist Towelette Pouch – Anyone recall how the survivors of subway or building disasters look? Talk about shooting a BB gun at a freight train. Anyone know what happens when you’re really contaminated with a bio or chemical agent? Perhaps the towelette can be used to dry your little tears after the DECON team has brushed off all the gross contaminates, stripped you butt-naked (and bagged everything you brought), sprayed you down with fire-hoses, scrubbed you down with a soapy solution, sprayed you down again for good measure and then dumped you into quarantine (possibly under armed guards). Now wasn’t that fun?

Thanks, but no thanks. I’ll rely on my brain and what happens to be either in my pocket or within my reach when the boogeyman comes.

Chris Wendt
USMC

Oh, a good read:
http://www.globalsecurity.org/wmd/library/policy/army/fm/3-5/fm3-5.pdf

When it comes to fear, trust the fearless:
http://www.thinkbam.com/aboutBam-meetTheTeam.html
dculberson

I do think they oversell the mask a bit, but to be fair the really dangerous radioactive substances like Polonium 210 are alpha emitters. You’re reasonably safe from alpha emitters as long as you don’t inhale or digest them as your skin will block most of the alpha radiation. So if the mask keeps you from inhaling the particles, it will keep you from getting a lethal dose of radiation.

Now, a normal dust mask is not a very effective screen against even nuisance dust particles. But carrying a respirator and petroleum jelly everywhere you go might raise even more eyebrows than this would.
- Antinous / Moderator
  
  But carrying a respirator and petroleum jelly everywhere you go might raise even more eyebrows than this would.
  
  Or get you a date that you’ll never forget.
andygates

It’s obvious marketing to fear, but hey, nothing new under the sun.

They’d do better with a smoke hood instead of that mask: all the protection of the mask, plus protection against smoke (the Tube tragedy some years ago was all smoke inhalation).

What, a torch, whistle and towelette aren’t in your EDC anyway? :)
Takuan

and what radioactive particles are you LIKELY to encounter in a terror bombing?
error404

… fully trained in first aid, that is what unites.

All that crap in a bag is what divides.
Brainspore

Why not just throw some condoms in there too? You’re probably statistically more likely to get an STD in a subway than die from a dirty bomb.
Takuan

well, advertising, but related I suppose.
Anonymous

The image on their website is perfection.
Blackbird

Wow. Aside from the shield on the facemask and the prybar, I’ve got better stuff in my first aid kit that I carry!

I have a go-bag I made myself (I bought the bag and the stuff to go in it : ) )
I once made the ‘mistake’ of buying an actual 3 day kit. They were on sale from $60 for $10…so I thought…why not. Not bad…but not worth $60…that’s for SURE!

Tak…in answer to your question. I think you’d likely encounter Americium-241. Also alpha radiation. You’d see it in VERY small amounts.
iheartboingboing

That “BAM Intel” blog has some great articles!
Takuan

real ones aren’t cheap
http://www.saferamerica.com/saProducts.asp?categoryID=12
Flitere

Nicolaicam, there are non-destructive ways to get out of your subway car, and they’ll work even if the power’s out. They’re designed to work that way. If a glass-breaking hammer makes your emergency kit so heavy that you hesitate to carry it every time you leave the house, it’s worse than useless to you.

Chris, Danny, I don’t care about McGyver. He’s fiction too. In an emergency, what you need is reality. Let me quote you some of the extremely useful rules of thumb listed on the Macdonald Jump Kits/Go Bags emergency preparedness page (Greg London and I are both recommending the same page):

In a survival situation, you live as long as your feet do.
If you don’t understand what’s going on, back off until you do understand.
You can live to be ninety without a Rambo knife, but hypothermia or dehydration will kill you deader’n dirt by this time tomorrow.
A terrorist attack is just a badly-placarded HAZMAT incident.
Some situations are non-survivable. Think ahead. Stay out of those situations.
Never ignore a warning, even if it doesn’t make any sense to you at the time.
Check the batteries in your smoke detector.
Brush your teeth, wear your seatbelt, quit smoking, wash your hands before eating and after using the toilet, and look both ways before crossing the street.

If you have an emergency in an urban area and the power and/or transit go out, you’re going to wind up walking home, or to some place that’s better than where you are now. The fancy dust mask and the little pry bar won’t help you do that. Balmex, adhesive moleskin, a phone card, and some spendable cash are what you need. A radio gets you news reports so you can monitor the situation and make good decisions. A regional map helps you settle on a realistic destination and figure out which bridges to aim for. If the weather’s cold and/or wet, the poncho and space blanket are a lot of help for not much additional weight.

While you’re thinking about it: it’ll probably be easier for you to contact someone outside the affected area than someone inside it. You and your significant other(s) should settle on a person you’ll both call to get and receive messages. If there are obvious staging areas on the outskirts of your urban area, figure out what they are and agree on which ones you’ll head for.

Takuan, I agree that emergency kits can be overpriced. Get a fanny pack and stock your own.
Guysmiley

Fear-mongering at its finest.
Duffong

No glow stick? Hmmm…
Anonymous

with the possible exception of toxic smoke, the listed threats are mostly about particulate matter. it’s probably not that much more than an N95 mask with a face shield.

and hey, respect the towelette. step one in any biohazard decontamination (say, bird flu guy coughs blood in your face) is to get most of the stuff off of you. when there’s only a film left you can use a microbicide. (i guess they assume if you are the kind of person who would buy this you’re already packing purell.)
Mister Moofoo

Sadly, the crowbar is too small to be really effective against zombies.

You know, ‘cuz they attack subways, too.
joncro

Shoot, a fella’ could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff. ..
xaxa

@19: They should include some paracetamoxyfrusebendroneomycin.

@33: I don’t know about your subway, but on the one I use all the carriages have doors — both the normal ones on the side, and one at either end, for emergencies. The driver’s cabs (at either end) also have doors with ramps to the track.

Except if there’s a fire, the safest place to stay in a train crash is on the train.
dbarak

Orange Moist Towelette Pouch: Good for wiping your ass when you lose control of your bowels.

@ #16 posted

You beat me by ONE MINUTE! ; ) And I can’t find the full text in order to one-up you…
invisibelle

What about ricin? Got anything in there fer ricin?
Anonymous

Hmmm… do they offer a kit to protect you against the far more likely dangers of being hassled by the anti-terrorist goons that pass for our protection from terrorist? Something to make the “it’s illegal to take pictures” crowd move along? Now that WOULD be useful.

Lanval
airship

*bah* A 7-inch crowbar is not nearly big enough to keep other desperate subway passengers from stealing your protective mask.

And #16 is right – it’s not big enough for zombies, either.
dross1260

Goes with the carbon fiber Lee press-on nails.
Falcon_Seven

@16 – Zombies?
Anyone who has ridden the subways of NYC knows the real danger is the C.H.U.D.s.
Danny

Ha! Check out my blog for more! http://www.bamintel.blogspot.com
Flitere

That kit’s a serious ripoff. It’s equipped for Hollywood movie scenario emergencies, not for real urban/subway emergencies — which was pretty much Danny Loschiavo’s point.

Compare that kit with the lists on the Jump Kits/Go Bags page. Here’s their list for a waist-pouch urban survival bag:

Urban bag (along with what’s in your pockets):
one AA flashlight (electric torch)
one AA transistor radio
one spare pack of AA batteries
one pack moleskin (thick adhesive-backed cotton felt used to protect against blisters)
anti-chafing ointment
one small sharp curved scissors (iris scissors or cuticle scissors)
one space blanket
one disposable poncho
250 mL of water
one whistle
$100 in ten-dollar bills (enough for two nights in a cheap motel or an inter-state bus/train ticket)
$10 in quarters (most common coin for vending machines, toll booths, and pay phones)
two disposable butane lighters
one pack waterproof matches (lifeboat matches)
one pre-paid phone card
lists of phone numbers
one pen
one notepad
inventory list
consider: regional map
consider: laminated photocopies of important documents (e.g. marriage license, birth certificate, social security card, first page of passport)

I’ve been through urban emergencies and subway emergencies, and I can tell you right now which one of those kits is actually useful. If you still want a smoke mask, buy one and toss it in.
snakedart

The baby crowbar might take out an underachieving headcrab. On a good day.
BlackPanda

How long before carrying one is considered “an act preparatory to terrorism”?
chris

All MacGyver ever needed was a pocketknife.

Towelettes… psssffttthh…
malex

I came here to say what #17 said.

Though honestly, this could have been marketed as Earthquake emergency kit without being quite so blatant in their fearmongering.
Danny

#26 You beat me to the punch!
Ernunnos

It doesn’t have much stuff and it’s overpriced, but if it gets people thinking and talking about ways to do it better, great!

I tend to prefer multi-use items. If you look at your go bag and say “Shoot, a fella’ could have a pretty good time in Vegas with all this stuff,” you did it right.
tw15

A bottle of water is probably the most important thing you’d need.
GregLondon

I second the nomination for the Jim Macdonald packs, go bags, and so on.
Danny

That is hilarious!
DominicSayers

Selling fear.

Don’t buy fear.

Fear is not freedom.
Anonymous

Major T. J. “King” Kong: Survival kit contents check. In them you’ll find: one forty-five caliber automatic; two boxes of ammunition; four days’ concentrated emergency rations; one drug issue containing antibiotics, morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills; one miniature combination Russian phrase book and Bible; one hundred dollars in rubles; one hundred dollars in gold; nine packs of chewing gum; one issue of prophylactics; three lipsticks; three pair of nylon stockings. Shoot, a fella’ could have a pretty good weekend in Vegas with all that stuff.
Anonymous

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8n2Zz1m7qNw