Give yourself horse legs


83 Responses to “Give yourself horse legs”

  1. Dewi Morgan says:

    #66: Unicorn on bottom? Where does the horn go?

  2. BadStoryDan says:

    This + BigDog = epic halloween costume.

  3. Anonymous says:

    Do these legs make me look fat?

  4. EH says:

    Do they come in cordovan?

  5. misshouseunited says:


    OR Dranei!

  6. Anonymous says:

    You’re using coconuts. You’ve got two empty halves of coconut and you’re banging them together.

  7. dross1260 says:

    Where the Lapithaen women at?

  8. Phikus says:

    More Halloween possibilities:

    Darkness (Tim Curry in Legend)


  9. Xopher says:

    Excuse me, but Pan is a god. Fauns and satyrs resemble him, not the other way around.

    Io! Pan! Io! Pan!

  10. Marshall says:

    I’ve seen folks wearing gadgets like this before, and the downside is always that they end up being too tall to do stuff. Kim’s seem to be just about the right height to be practical, which is why they’re so damn cool.

  11. Anonymous says:

    The horse leg bit was kinda creepy.

  12. cans says:

    Done before!

    And I think these folks were ‘boinged, as well…

  13. jfrancis says:

    @66: It would go on the top, except that’s where the human part is

  14. jfrancis says:

    (I meant @72)

    …at least that’s what he keeps insisting. For the movie, we’re thinking Ben Stiller.


  15. GeekMan says:

    On the one hand: the thought of running across an open field at break-neck speed in the spring-loaded version of these legs is a wonderful thought.

    On the other hand, the idea of how excited the furry crowd is getting over these legs completely ruins that thought.

  16. Anonymous says:

    How long until these start showing up at Fur Cons?

  17. Anonymous says:

    What, no running?

  18. Bret says:

    Everybody google Pony Play.

  19. Phikus says:

    Why not? I frequently give myself a hoarse voice… *whinny cough cough*

  20. Anonymous says:

    Put em on backwards and you can be Torgo.

  21. Anonymous says:

    If you were a contestant on Mantracker, this would throw him TOTALLY off your trail… LMAO!! Kinda cool…

  22. the_boy says:

    I give it two years before “centauring” becomes a thing.

  23. Phikus says:

    It would behoove you to get yourself a pair…

  24. Anonymous says:

    The fetish crowd just went bananas.

  25. nzruss says:

    I don’t want horse hoves….

    I want bear arms. I have rights!!!!

  26. Anonymous says:

    Them will say; Not intended for actual use.

    Unless she wants to be litigated.

  27. Steiny says:

    First thing that sprang to mind for me was “The Arrival”

  28. Anonymous says:

    “Calling all centaur fetishists!”


    oh wait.. they’re already on it I’m sure.

  29. Anonymous says:

    This video is almost its own unicorn chaser

  30. jfrancis says:

    My daughter invented a centaur that is human on top and unicorn on bottom.


  31. Felix Mitchell says:

    that skirt does nothing for her thighs

  32. jfrancis says:

    When I was a kid I used to think the knees went backwards, but they actually just have normal knees and ankles and very long feet.

  33. natch says:

    Cool! But I want to see the crowd reaction shots… please? Take a stroll around Pike’s Market?

  34. Random_Tangent says:

    How are these good for Centuar fetishists? HELLO! These are obviously most useful for Minotaurphilliacs.

  35. Antinous / Moderator says:

    Did someone say Centaur fetish? Mildly NSFW.

  36. erindipity says:

    heh heh heh!

  37. Duffong says:

    This might sound kinda mean, but I want a horse to calmly walk up to her – shake its head in dismay – turn around – and then kick her into that lake.

  38. Anonymous says:

    $1000???? I made a similar set from junk salvaged from the dumpster at my apartment:

    I was following the wonderful directions from these folk:

  39. nutbastard says:

    oh man it’d be a blast to show up to an LSD party with these things on!

  40. Egypt Urnash says:

    Damn, I want some of these with big articulated claws instead of hooves.

  41. Anonymous says:

    I have always wanted cloven hooves.

    Horses don’t have the split hooves though, so this is really more like cow legs or Pan legs.

  42. TJ S says:

    Are these for me? I say “neigh”.

  43. Anonymous says:

    Am I the only one who finds these really disturbingly wrong?

  44. aoi says:

    @ #34 Anonymous
    I saw them at sakuracon too.
    They seemed to be fairly agile moving around in them, but man did they tower above everyone else. I wouldn’t mind taking some for a test drive myself, I’m wondering if they work more like stilts or just a balanced extension of the leg.

  45. Anonymous says:

    Oh, God.
    Xavier, Renegade Angel in real life!
    We are dead.

  46. Hanglyman says:

    They’re more satyr than centaur.

    Antinous, I’ll be forever left wondering what a horny centaur version of Mr. T has to do with folk music now.

  47. Anonymous says:

    The Centaur Fetish thing is ascendant.
    Dan Savage has been going on about it on his podcast for the last few installments.

    Sex Columnists: ONE
    Cultural zeitgeist: ZERO

    On a barely related note; this kind of weirdness in my world makes me glad to be alive right now.

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      After looking through many Google images for ‘centaur’, I have to report that of all the horrible ways to create an image of a centaur, creating it and then photoshopping your own head onto it is the worst.

  48. Hanglyman says:

    Oh man, and he’s actually not part horse, but part bull, so that makes him a minotaur? Except not, because minotaurs only have two legs?

  49. Anonymous says:

    Yeah, I’m thinking that would work well with that dinosaur show for the veloceraptors. Pretty cool and nice work. (Not sure I’d want to wear the furry legs.)

  50. nutbastard says:

    “things like this really get my goat.”

    “why does she have to be the centaur of attention?”

    “i wonder if this idea will Pan out”

    -nutty b

  51. Anonymous says:

    These are great for anyone who wants to dress up like the Tauren from World of Warcraft – the horse like species in the game. Are there conventions for those people too?

  52. Sekino says:

    These aren’t ‘digigrade’ though. Horses are unguligrades.

    Am I the only one who finds these really disturbingly wrong?

    I gather you don’t celebrate Halloween much: These would be SO awesome for a devil costume! Or a post-apocalyptic satyr…

  53. lakelady says:

    these would be sooo awesome for a production of Equus!

  54. Brainspore says:

    I’m sure the fetishists are working on a sexual position where two people in those getups would resemble one centaur. And no, I don’t need to see the link.

  55. nutbastard says:

    for the record:

    centaur – human torso/head/arms, horse body/legs

    minotaur – human legs, bull/ram head/upper body

    anyone know if there’s a ‘taur’ for what Pan is? (goat legs, man upper body)

  56. Anonymous says:

    I absolutely saw a couple with these things at SakuraCon. I don’t think they opted for the hooves, though.

    We spent most of our time wondering how they poop with those on. Do they remove them? Do they just pray they don’t fall?

  57. nutbastard says:


    ok… in that case:

    “these look like a lot of faun”

  58. Brainspore says:

    Anybody know the difference between a faun and a satyr? Does it just depend on how much they’ve been drinking?

  59. Tdawwg says:

    Satyrs are Greek; Fauns, Roman. Otherwise, there’s a lot of overlapping. They both drink a lot, a lot of the time.

  60. Tonamel says:

    Fauns are Roman, satyrs are Greek. They’re both half-goat folk, though.

  61. philoponia says:

    Can we please get some “legs” for our arms?

  62. nutbastard says:

    so when assessing the amount of agility imparted on the wearer, would one say this has good panhandling?

  63. Anonymous says:

    reminds me of portal’s spring loaded fall breaking thingies.

  64. Anonymous says:

    Felix Mitchell said chauvinistically:

    “that skirt does nothing for her thighs”

    So, an artist creates something unique for the universe, and instead of critiquing, appreciating, or commenting on it, you resort to sexism. It makes me feel awesome, that as a woman engineer, everything I ever create will be judged by men like YOU based on my appearance.

  65. Tdawwg says:

    Anyone interested in a good Centaur story should turn to the locus classicus, Ovid’s story of the battle between the Lapiths and Centaurs, in book 12 of the Metamorphoses. Lotsa drinkin’, lotsa killin’, lotsa (readerly) laughin’.

  66. Brainspore says:

    @ Aninous #40:

    Ah, that explains why the Narnia books were suspiciously devoid of orgies.

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      Ah, that explains why the Narnia books were suspiciously devoid of orgies.

      Did you miss Voyage of the Dong Treader and The Horse and His……oh never mind.

  67. Anonymous says:

    Wow. You could totally make a Doom Cyberdemon outfit with those.

  68. Anonymous says:

    Me need dinosaur version.

  69. jimh says:

    I know a lot of people will be fauning over these and making their own. But I hope she doesn’t try to copyright this idea- because you know… satyr is fair use.

  70. nutbastard says:

    @#40 Antinous

    “Satyrs are also highly sexualized. Fauns not so much.”

    With Pan being the glaring exception??

  71. Teller says:

    Palominolo Blahnik.

  72. quiksilvrm says:


    I take it you haven’t heard of BlizzCon’s Costume Contests

  73. High On Markers says:

    So, what, you BB readers are not also Cracked readers? That must be why you’re so woefully ignorant of Boytaur (back onto the centaur love theme, here)

  74. Anonymous says:

    Hey Hurk!

  75. Dewi Morgan says:

    JFrancis: My mind is simply too dirty to envisage a suitable location for the horn. So, I’ll be first in line for the movie!

  76. fnc says:

    And you won’t need someone to follow you around clacking coconuts together either.

  77. Brett Burton says:

    This is who you market these to:

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