Shatnerquake: bizarro novel about every Shatner character sucked into reality to hunt down William Shatner

Rose sez, "Shatnerquake is a book by Jeff Burk, available now from independent publisher Eraserhead Press who specializes in publishing bizarro cult fiction."
It's the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.
William Shatner? William Shatner. William Shatner!

Buy Shatnerquake


  1. Denny Crane is already capable of breaking the fourth wall with his cow-given mental powers, what would happen if he were able to move from one fictional universe to another?

  2. Thanks, Cory – that just resulted in yet another buying spree on Amazon. I’m trying to cut down, but a book that features Bruce Campbell *and* William Shatner is going to end up on my bookshelves eventually.

    I cant describe how I feel now!
    Shatner and Campbell!!!! ÔÔ

  4. Interesting intellectual exercise: If you put James T. Kirk, T.J. Hooker, and Denny Crane in the same room, who would come out alive?

  5. I’m surprised that you’d endorse such a blatant pandering to anti-Campbellian prejudice. We are a peaceful creed and would never resort to terrorism, even to save the world from Shatner’s ego.

  6. Hey, it’s not just Crane, Hooker and Kirk:

    “Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and – of course – William Shatner!”

  7. Im staring at that book cover, squinting, trying to see how that can resemble william shatner. my brain doesn’t recognize that representation.

  8. Looking forward to the film version.

    Shatner, of course, would love to do it – playing all the parts. Campbell would be in for sure. But it would be even more deliciously awesome if they hired Drew Carey and had Kevin Pollak do the voice.

    Or maybe get Zemekis to direct and do the whole thing in CG – not cuz it would be cool but just so we get those awful pictures of Bill in a blue spandex mocap leotard.

    That was too much.

    I have to go lie down now.

  9. I’m guessing when one Shatner meets another, the first thing they do is size up each others hairpiece. I wonder if Tim Allen’s character from Galaxy Quest is involved.

  10. Dear GOD, why isn’t there an ebook version of it??

    I should be on the 5th page by now!!

  11. This was kind of already done a few years ago in a spoof/advert thing entitled SEVEN which featured T.J. Hooker, Captain Kirk and Rescue 911 Shatner reenacting the final scene from Se7en.

    You can get your fix of multiple shatners here:

  12. This has got to be the stupidest goddam idea for a book that I have seen in a long time. It is, of course, now in my shopping cart.

    I will need GlaxoSmithKline to rush development of a memory-wiping drug so that, once I finish reading it, I will be able to read it again with an identical amount of surprise and delight as the first time.


  13. ZippySpinCycle @19: Yes Jack, but how many Shats do you think you can handle at once?

    Also, IRT the “Seven” clip: effing win on the Star Trek door “woosh” sound.

  14. Nanuq, Daneyul: the answer is simple. They would all succumb to the might of the Big Giant Head.

  15. I’m almost afraid to read this book – the concept is so utterly brilliant, it’s almost impossible to live up to. I kind of feel like I should just worship it without actually reading.

    Alas, I can’t do that, I have to find out for myself.


  17. @29
    I would only like it if they had Kevin Bacon’s character from Tremors.

    On another note:
    I am saddened they have left out a couple of Shatners.

  18. I would like to go on record as having bought this . Amazon makes it too easy to impulse buy and I don’t even have 1-click turned on.

    I told my wife about it, she said, “You don’t ever have to worry about me borrowing THAT one.”

    Looking forward to reading this!

  19. My son is gonna love this! He’s a real Campbellian (last time I looked in his room, yesterday, Bruce was on the TV!) I think he’s a little frightened and confused by Shatner.
    The boys have always known him as Uncle Bill. He only stops by when he needs something- use the phone, couple bucks for gas, or just laying low. He got in a fight with our dog once over a big beef rib bone.
    We would never leave our sons alone in the room with him.

  20. What about a “Prey for the Wilcats” William Shatner? That is the true acid test of the Shatner Geekdom of this novel…

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