Shatnerquake: bizarro novel about every Shatner character sucked into reality to hunt down William Shatner

Rose sez, "Shatnerquake is a book by Jeff Burk, available now from independent publisher Eraserhead Press who specializes in publishing bizarro cult fiction."
It's the first ShatnerCon with William Shatner as the guest of honor! But after a failed terrorist attack by Campbellians, a crazy terrorist cult that worships Bruce Campbell, all of the characters ever played by William Shatner are suddenly sucked into our world. Their mission: hunt down and destroy the real William Shatner.
William Shatner? William Shatner. William Shatner!

Buy Shatnerquake


Discussion

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Concept: 5 out of 5!
Execution: Remains to be seen.

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Likely a load of Shat.

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#3 posted by EH, April 30, 2009 11:26 PM

DENNY CRANE!

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Malkovich Malkovich?

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#5 posted by Anonymous, April 30, 2009 11:58 PM

Denny Crane is already capable of breaking the fourth wall with his cow-given mental powers, what would happen if he were able to move from one fictional universe to another?

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Thanks, Cory - that just resulted in yet another buying spree on Amazon. I'm trying to cut down, but a book that features Bruce Campbell *and* William Shatner is going to end up on my bookshelves eventually.

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I could not help myself. I bought the book.

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OMFG WTF FTW LOL!
I cant describe how I feel now!
Shatner and Campbell!!!! ÔÔ

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I would have called it "Shatnerproof"

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#10 posted by nanuq, May 1, 2009 4:34 AM

Interesting intellectual exercise: If you put James T. Kirk, T.J. Hooker, and Denny Crane in the same room, who would come out alive?

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I'm surprised that you'd endorse such a blatant pandering to anti-Campbellian prejudice. We are a peaceful creed and would never resort to terrorism, even to save the world from Shatner's ego.

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#12 posted by daneyul, May 1, 2009 5:40 AM

Hey, it's not just Crane, Hooker and Kirk:

"Featuring: Captain Kirk, TJ Hooker, Denny Crane, Rescue 911 Shatner, Singer Shatner, Shakespearean Shatner, Twilight Zone Shatner, Cartoon Kirk, Esperanto Shatner, Priceline Shatner, SNL Shatner, and - of course - William Shatner!"

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#13 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 5:47 AM

what, no William Shatner-as-Alexander the Great?

http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=16166

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#14 posted by MarkM, May 1, 2009 5:48 AM

Im staring at that book cover, squinting, trying to see how that can resemble william shatner. my brain doesn't recognize that representation.

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Sorta like the plot for White Comanche!

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#16 posted by Sparrow, May 1, 2009 5:52 AM

But does it have William F***ing Shatner? (I'm sure I'll buy it anyway.)

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#17 posted by Robbo, May 1, 2009 5:56 AM

Looking forward to the film version.

Shatner, of course, would love to do it - playing all the parts. Campbell would be in for sure. But it would be even more deliciously awesome if they hired Drew Carey and had Kevin Pollak do the voice.

Or maybe get Zemekis to direct and do the whole thing in CG - not cuz it would be cool but just so we get those awful pictures of Bill in a blue spandex mocap leotard.

That was too much.

I have to go lie down now.

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#18 posted by Snig, May 1, 2009 6:09 AM

I'm guessing when one Shatner meets another, the first thing they do is size up each others hairpiece. I wonder if Tim Allen's character from Galaxy Quest is involved.

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#19 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 6:10 AM

No 3rd rock Shatner?

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#20 posted by Blaine, May 1, 2009 6:10 AM

Dear GOD, why isn't there an ebook version of it??

I should be on the 5th page by now!!

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#21 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 6:11 AM

WOW published fan fiction.

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Shatner. I'd fight William Shatner.

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#23 posted by igpajo, May 1, 2009 6:26 AM

I want my copy signed buy William Shatner!

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This was kind of already done a few years ago in a spoof/advert thing entitled SEVEN which featured T.J. Hooker, Captain Kirk and Rescue 911 Shatner reenacting the final scene from Se7en.

You can get your fix of multiple shatners here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZseK_2IVXtU

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#25 posted by Phikus, May 1, 2009 7:08 AM

Does it include our favorite Shatner, the chocolaty one?

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#26 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 7:14 AM

We MUST hear what Bill has to say about this!

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Oh my, that is funny. Kudos to the author and to Eraserhead Press.

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#28 posted by Ratdog, May 1, 2009 8:08 AM

I'm actually crying it is so beautiful.

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#29 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 8:14 AM

I wanna see this same concept with Kevin Bacon.

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This has got to be the stupidest goddam idea for a book that I have seen in a long time. It is, of course, now in my shopping cart.

I will need GlaxoSmithKline to rush development of a memory-wiping drug so that, once I finish reading it, I will be able to read it again with an identical amount of surprise and delight as the first time.

I await SHATNERQUAKE AND ZOMBIES.

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A better title would have been Shatstorm.

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ZippySpinCycle @19: Yes Jack, but how many Shats do you think you can handle at once?

Also, IRT the "Seven" clip: effing win on the Star Trek door "woosh" sound.

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#33 posted by Ignatz, May 1, 2009 9:13 AM

Nanuq, Daneyul: the answer is simple. They would all succumb to the might of the Big Giant Head.

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#34 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 10:19 AM

@21, that clip of Shatawesome was done for the MTV movie awards way back when.

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#35 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 10:35 AM

I'm almost afraid to read this book - the concept is so utterly brilliant, it's almost impossible to live up to. I kind of feel like I should just worship it without actually reading.

Alas, I can't do that, I have to find out for myself.

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#36 posted by Phikus, May 1, 2009 11:09 AM

Theredmax@21: FTMFW!

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#37 posted by jimh, May 1, 2009 11:27 AM

PICTURE yourself... in a BOAT. On a RIVER!

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Is there a Priceline Shatner in it, too?

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#39 posted by Phikus, May 1, 2009 12:14 PM

...And a GIRL with KALEIDOSCOPE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

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Never mind. Just read the Amazon reviews. Of course there is. Want.

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#41 posted by daneyul, May 1, 2009 2:18 PM


Esperanto Shatner!

That alone is worth the price of admission.

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#42 posted by Snig, May 1, 2009 2:23 PM

I'll only get it if it has $20,000 pyramid Shatner
http://www.poetv.com/video.php?vid=27947

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#43 posted by Anonymous, May 1, 2009 2:41 PM

Yes, but who is the real Shatner??

"That guy, is the worst actor ever!"

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#44 posted by Ratdog, May 1, 2009 9:13 PM

@29
I would only like it if they had Kevin Bacon's character from Tremors.

On another note:
I am saddened they have left out a couple of Shatners.

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I would like to go on record as having bought this . Amazon makes it too easy to impulse buy and I don't even have 1-click turned on.

I told my wife about it, she said, "You don't ever have to worry about me borrowing THAT one."

Looking forward to reading this!

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#46 posted by Anonymous, May 2, 2009 6:35 AM

Don't forget Shatner the Chairman from IRON CHEF!!

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My son is gonna love this! He's a real Campbellian (last time I looked in his room, yesterday, Bruce was on the TV!) I think he's a little frightened and confused by Shatner.
The boys have always known him as Uncle Bill. He only stops by when he needs something- use the phone, couple bucks for gas, or just laying low. He got in a fight with our dog once over a big beef rib bone.
We would never leave our sons alone in the room with him.

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#48 posted by Ratdog, May 2, 2009 8:05 PM

@47

I'm telling Shatner what you said about him!!

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What about a "Prey for the Wilcats" William Shatner? That is the true acid test of the Shatner Geekdom of this novel...

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