Florida town orders employees to wear underwear and cover wounds

City workers in Brooksville, Florida have been handed a new set of workplace rules. Now, they must wear underwear, use deodorant, and cover their open wounds.
There's your new tourism slogan: "Come to Brooksville: We've Covered Our Wounds!"

Fighting for the great American tradition of going commando at work was the city mayor, Joe Bernardini, who was the only member of the council to vote against underwear. He expressed concern over how the new code could be enforced, while also getting a headstart on being charged with harassment: "They said you had to wear undergarments," the mayor was quoted as saying, "but who's going to be the judge of that? Sometimes when it comes to certain people going bra-less, it's obvious. [Emphasis added.] But who's staring to see if that person doesn't have underwear on?"

City Workers Ordered to Wear Underwear


  1. Hmm…employees ill-dressed, reeking, and bearing open wounds. I think they need to stop hiring zombies…

  2. I’m with Joe; commando is the way to go.

    Also, aren’t there credible health concerns with wearing a bra? …something about pressure impairing certain lymph nodes, I think.

    Additionally, what an epic management fail that workplace rules were sought, rather than, you know, communication among employees.

    Just come out and tell Bob that he smells bad, or tell Jane that bleeding on the floor is unsanitary.

  3. I guess Lindsay, Paris and Britney will have to job hunt elsewhere when the celebutard gig dries up.

  4. Surely health concerns with wearing deodorants, too – recall the BB story just a while ago about all the vile and toxic ingredients in cosmetics.

    Brooksville, Florida: Don’t expect service if you have a perfume allergy.

  5. @6- Allowed? You might even be required to if you’ve got a gaping head wound and nothing else is handy.

  6. My mom worked at a bank that had a “casual day”. Some of the employees seemed to not understand work casual. One gentleman was wearing bright green overalls with the front flap down and a t-shirt. When he was asked to at least do up the flap he said “I can’t, the flap has a stain on it.”

    Pants, collared shirt, underwear, socks, black shoes. Hard to go wrong there at most office jobs.

  7. This is about par for the course for Brooksville — via the growth in central Florida in the last 20 years, they’re now too big to be podunk according to the numbers, but mentally, they’re still a wide spot on the road.

  8. Brooksville is named in honor of South Carolina senator Preston Brooks, who became famous for beating fellow senator Charles Sumner in the Senate Chamber as commentary on Sumner’s recent speech vilifying slavery. A lot of Southern folks thought he was a real hero for that.

  9. Clearly, the underwear part will be enforced by giving wedgies. If a person is not wedgie-compliant, then they’re in violation of the policy.

    This *isn’t* as bad as the Bozeman Montana stuff. This is just dumb. Bozeman is EVIL.

  10. But wait – what about non-wedgieable undies? e.g. the classic 18th Century drawers, chemise, and three or four petticoats combo.

  11. Reminds me of the scene in Woody Allen’s Bananas where El Presidente declares that underwear must be changed every half-hour and worn on the outside, so they can check.

  12. I don’t object to the idea of a dress code, but wow, this drags me back to first grade in Catholic school, when our uniform included navy blue underpants – and being out of uniform was a serious offense. Even if it was white underpants instead of navy blue.

  13. It’s not shameful enough to be involved in government that they have to figure out a new way to make it worse?

  14. Wow, I am so very non-compliant today. I did cover open wound by changing from bike attire to geek attire, though. So, ya know, one out of three ain’t bad, right?.

  15. The article says the city also requires “no skirts worn “below the waistline””

    SWEET! The heck with miniskirts. Anything below the waist is TOO LONG.

  16. So who defines what is considered underwear? is a Brazilian thong with nothing more than a spot in front enough? I agree with the mayor because if you start checking then you are opening yourself up for a lawsuit.

  17. They ought to make sure that they are all using toilet paper, too. I take it that the underwear must be clean to meet the goals of this Policy.

  18. Lawsuit. This is a government, not a private
    company, abridging expression. Why are pierced
    earlobes ok, eyebrows not?

    (I have neither)

  19. I can’t believe the mayor is the only one who realized how unenforcible these new rules were. Who’s going to be inspecting underpants?

    Although he loses all of his hard-earned points for the remark about some women going bra-less being obvious. That totally derailed his argument.

  20. Nothing like watching a garbage man wearing a short skirt bend over to pick up a garbage can.

    Who wears short shorts… Police, Firemen & Garbage Men wear short shorts… If you dare wear short shorts… Nair… never mind.

  21. oh, yay! floriduh makes the news once
    again, and once again, it’s not only incredibly stupid,it’s right up the road. what can one say about brooksville that would be good….they have the most challenging disc-golf course in fl. i think there is even more than one stoplight! requiring them to cover their stench cannot be a bad thing. instead of enforcing the underwear law, they may wanna consider doing something about the copious man-boobs flollopping around up there. in other words: put a freekin t-shirt on fellas! and ladies of brooksville, NO MINISKIRTS, PLEASE! also, i believe that area is the meth capital of fl. as well! thank u, thank u very much brooksville.

  22. Sign painters in the town are expecting a temporary bump in business as “No shoes, no shirt, no service” signs are required by “law” to be updated to include “no underwear, no deodorant, open sores”.

    P.S. Is the job for Town Underwear Inspector open, and what’s the pay?

  23. When I lived in Indiana, I worked at a factory for a while. One of my friends (a room mate) who also worked there was a die hard free baller, and generally wore sweat pants to work in. Apparently, some of the women complained about being able to see the vague form of his junk through the loose-fitting sweats and the supervisor told him he’d have to wear underwear. Not being a particularly compliant sort of fellow (and not actually owning any underwear) he did the best he could and wore a second pair of cut-off sweats over the long sweats. It seemed to do the trick, because nobody else complained.

  24. @Just Another Username

    That infomercial is priceless, it cries out for remixing. “You can use a lot of power on Salli” FTW!

  25. I’m a nurse and one time I was wearing striped boxers under my white scrub pants when the nursing supervisor sneaked up behind me and whispered in my ear that I had to start wearing white underwear.

  26. In response to #8’s comment: Every once in a while, we have “jeans days” at work. You’re not limited to jeans, but you can dress casually. Anyway, last fall, one employee took this a little too far and wore a bedazzled Reno, NV shirt and a pair of super tight spandex leggings (you know, the kind people wear under long shirts/dresses when it’s cold out).

    That person doesn’t work here anymore.

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