Just Thinking About the Charmin Bears Makes Me Cringe

According to this story on mental_floss, nothing is more American than Mom, apple pie, and the freedom to wipe your butt with commercially produced toilet paper.


  1. yup. i remember being in bathroom stalls in Latvia that had holders stocked with slips of old newspaper to use.

  2. I’ve been in plenty of places where the bathrooms had nothing. It was a luxury to have a toilet, much less toilet paper. America has awesome public shitters.

    1. If we criminalize shitting then only the criminals will shit. And they’re too inconsiderate to light a candle.

  3. I was interested to note during a recent trip to Neveda that the US Charmin bears have dialogue – and it seemed weird. I much prefer the UK ads with silent characters and voiceover instead.

    I always liked the ad campaign – with its “bears defecating in the woods” motif I thought it was both clever and honest: “Toilet paper: you wipe your arse with it.”

  4. Americans, on average, use 57 squares a day..

    ..but not for pooping, surely. What do you spend your 57 squares on?

    1. .but not for pooping, surely.

      I believe that we eat quite a few more fruits and vegetables than our UK brethren.

  5. I want to hear more about these other, non-commercial, modes of toilet paper production. It there some maker movement 3d printing toilet paper, or lovingly crafting it from the pulp of crushed ukuleles?

  6. I think we all know that bears crap in the woods. It seems unlikely they would use toilet paper. Leaves probably, bunnies perhaps, but not toilet paper. Just saying.

  7. Toilet paper must be the second-most euphemised product after tampons and pads. Recently in NZ we’ve had an ad campaign by a major TP seller that tried to extend the uses of toilet paper. The woman in the ad stuffs some down her bra to pad out her dress and then uses some to apply cosmetics to her face. The voice-over man tells us that their toilet paper has many more uses and really is “pamper paper”. I gag every time I see the ad.

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