A blog about horrible fake tan jobs

paleisthenewtan.com. A blog about the dangers of fake tanning. (via JDP)


  1. Wow. The guy they compare to Goomba really looks like a mummified corpse. It’s absolutely horrible. I can’t imagine what some of these people can have been thinking.

    Do they look better in person? Is it the photography that makes them look like Chameleon Boy from the Legion of Super Heroes, only without antennae?

    Let me just say Ew.

  2. Remember when people would say, ‘Healthy tan’?
    I would refer to it as a “pre-cancerous burn”

    I’ve got a nice healthy pale going and have had for a long time.

  3. Best t-shirt quote I’ve ever seen:

    Chicks dig pale skinny guys.

    Unfortunately, the person wearing the shirt was a pale skinny guy.

  4. When people ask me why I look so much younger than my real age, I tell them “I stay out of the sun.” I do, and I always have. I got a tan one year, and it looked OK, but I’m a paleface and I look best when my face is pale. Unless I take extraordinary care, I just plain burn. I gave up on looking tan.

    For a while I considered a spray-on tan, but I thought they’d look like real tans. Now that I see what they actually look like, I’ll stick with my glow-in-the-dark pallor, thank you.

  5. A lot of crossover with hotchickswithdouchebags.com, at least with the guys (Gator, Poo, the Prompaloompas), some acknowledged, some not. But yeah, scary as all hell.

  6. Not about the danger, about the ugly.

    Also, the real overdone tan is the worst.

    Best ever, I have a health textbook from 1925 that makes grand claims about the ‘healthy coat of tan’ including the claim that average window glass blocks all UV which is needed for health! Of course we do need vitamin D, so it’s not completely farfetched.

  7. Yeaaah. I’ll take my healthy, stay-out-of-the-sun-and-wear-a-hat-and-blockout-if-I-MUST-go-out-in it skin, tyvm. I’m 33 and frequently get mistaken for 25, so I must be doing something right ;-)

  8. The bodybuilders showcased do not just walk around tanned like that though. They have special tanning products that they use only when competing and while it does look goofy it’s slightly less out of place when performing on stage with 10 other people in swimwear.

  9. You can play Count The Kissy-faces too. WTF is up w/ that? Like we needed further proof of douchebaggery…

    And yes, there must be something to staying out of the sun and staying young looking. People generally guess my age as 10 years younger.

Comments are closed.