Apartment building exorcism

Nichole East posted this video on Flickr documenting an exorcism performed by her neighbors last week. She also snapped the above photo of the friendly note she left them. (Thanks, Greg Long!)

• [bitman362]

  What “Video of an Exorcism”? All I saw was a wall and closed door.
  How about I post a video of an empty street and call it “Subway muggings” ?

• [wrybread]

  My thoughts, not that they particularly matter: this would be a hilarious note to leave someone who’s having super loud sex regularly. But in this context I feel for the people on the other end. Its belittling their deeply held religious beliefs, and I say that unless these exorcisms are very regular (I have a feeling they aren’t), give them some space. Its kind of like leaving a note asking someone who’s having an emotional breakdown to please shut the fuck up I’m trying to sleep.

  If you really want to live in the city with no noise ever from your neighbors, move to a loft building where you can bully people with the co-op board. Otherwise learn to deal with the fruits of cultural diversity.

  That said, as someone who loves spotting notes in the wild, its still pretty funny. Bitchy, condescending and rude, but funny.

• [dragonfrog]

  Personally I prefered to have neighbours who were noisier than us – that way, we know we’re not the noisy ones. I’ll gladly put up with a bit of jolly drunken singing, or shouting through the apartment rather than walking to the next room, because then I can rest easy when my own parties get a little rowdy.

  As long as it’s not loud top 40 music. The combination of catchiness and constant repetition of a tiny rotation of songs is a killer.

  • [AirPillo]

    I used to think that was a blessing too… until the noisier neighbors kept getting so rowdy that sheriffs showed up… and then moved on down the street after breaking up their rowdy parties to break up our peaceful ones preemptively.

    In that case the noisier neighbors become sort of like the kid in class who goes “teacher, you forgot to assign us homework!”

• [Anonymous]

  Why would you leave a note in English if the exorcism was not in English? That does them no good.

  What I got out of this was “En el nombre de Dios, vas! AHORA! Cuando vas? AHORA?” meaning “In the name of God, GO! NOW! When do you go? NOW!”

• [Anonymous]

  @Anon #47 – Superstitious Mahayanist / Chinese / Tibetan Buddhists have all the same trappings as Western Organised religion.

• [Nawel]

  It doesn’t sound like a typical Catholic exorcism, since those are done according to the Roman Ritual; this guy keeps repeting “now, now, now”, it doesn’t sound like a priest to me, but more like a pastor or self appointed preacher of some kind, of some “evangelist” christian church.

  It does sound a little creepy, specially by the end (in fact I’m not playing it again ’cause the wife asked me not to), but it’s hard to know if it is the real thing or not, at the beginning I thought it was some guy beating his wife or something.

  I would love to know what happened next.

  • [Antinous / Moderator]

    It doesn’t sound like a typical Catholic exorcism

    Catholic exorcisms require a priest. As far as I recall, the Jesuits are usually the only ones qualified.

• [Anonymous]

  Wow, that sounded like someone getting the crap beaten out of them…didn’t it occur to anyone to just call the cops?

  • [Antinous / Moderator]

    Exorcisms don’t kill people. Exiting demons kill people.

• [scifijazznik]

  The power of Christ compels me to say that sounds wonderfully kinky.

  • [voivoed]

    Agree, I have to convince my wife to let me exorcise some demons out of her. It sounds awesome.

• [Antinous / Moderator]

  Is that what you kids are calling it these days?

  • [mmbb]

    the ‘r’ in “exorcism” still believes in open relationships, duh!

• [Anonymous]

  I love that someone is claiming that Buddhist exorcism is superior to Christian exorcism.

  What criteria is being used?

• [Chas44]

  This kind of thing is why I now live far out in the country, in a single-family, detached home. (In my last apartment, the nice family downstairs filled the building with the smell of kimchi four times a week. I’d never smelled it before. At first I thought I was having an aneurysm.)

• [David Pescovitz]

  Ahora!

• [Hirsty]

  Was this an exorsism or some unwanted dinner party guests?

• [joeposts]

  Geez, and here I am getting threatening phone calls from the gentleman downstairs because I “walk too loud.” I sort of envy people who don’t understand how disturbing they sound. If we had more exorcisms in the building maybe I wouldn’t have to tiptoe around.

• [ASIFA-Hollywood Animation Archive]

  They should sell tickets! Sounds like a great show.

• [weatherman]

  The problem with these apartment exorcisms is that no matter how well they work, the demon always just goes to another apartment. I have the same problem in my building with roaches – my neighbors bomb, the roaches come to my place. I bomb, the roaches go to the neighbors place.

  To be really effective you have to exorcise the whole building at the same time.

• [David Pescovitz]

  Ahora!

• [Anonymous]

  Translation please?

• [Anonymous]

  I summon an interpreter.

• [Anja Flower]

  The power of Christ would compel me to knock on their door and ask them, for the love of God, to shut the fuck up so that I can work in peace.

  Then again, my roomies and I have been known to have midnight Angerfist stomp parties, so that might be just a tad hypocritical of me.

• [Anonymous]

  I fully agree that there is no need to alarm and upset an entire buildings worth of tenants with demon exspelling on a school night. it was damn nice of the tenants to not phone the police and allow the process to unfold in a an organic way in any case. cultural understanding goes both ways padre.

• [Anonymous]

  The whole video look was so banal that I was waiting for the door to blow off just after I’d been lulled into boredom and make me crap my pants.

• [Grey Devil]

  wut

• [kc0bbq]

  The area I work in had an exorcism done in it one weekend. It was a Buddhist exorcism, so no Captain Howdy awesomeness. :(

  • [Anonymous]

    What the heck is a Buddhist exorcism? I didn’t think they believed in that.

    • [Anonymous]

      although buddhism does not exist, it does exist though a very famous buddhist master who told their pupils to go in the forest to meditate with the tigers and the demons.

      spiritual people tend only to see spirits. with or without body, there should be no difference.

      • [technogeek]

        That was zen. This is dao.

        As far as people’s deeply held beliefs are concerned: If the noisy ritual is a one-time event, fine. If it happens a second time, I think it’s worth pointing out that not everyone shares those beliefs and it might be better to take this activity to sacred — and better noise-isolated — ground.

        Yeah, I know; the joys of apartment dwelling. Which, as someone else said, is one of the reasons I eventually gave up on apartments; a house is more expensive but provides a lot more privacy. In both directions.

    • [Anonymous]

      Tibetan Buddhists have been performing exorcisms for much, much longer than any christian priests. It’s the better model, because it separates the psychic attachment (demon to christians) BEFORE removing/destroying it, which results in a hell of a lot less screaming.

      Tibetan Buddhism is very spiritual and understands that, just because they’re not trying to worship anything, that doesn’t mean there aren’t entities all around, such as Tulpas and Djinn and other spirits. These things can latch onto a person or an area, and can be removed by the correct methods.

      -Sef
      http://www.exodus-solutions.org.uk

• [scifijazznik]

  Ahora?

• [Anonymous]

  The Spanish word “ahora” means now.

• [David Pescovitz]

  Ahora!

• [juepucta]

  That was a lot of “ahoras”. Basically it’s your regular jesus freak mumbo jumbo about “blood of christ compelling you to leave, filthy demon – NOW; leave this person NOW; etc”. I think these sort of things work because, if i were a demon i’d be so annoyed by the preacher man i’d leave just to get him to shut the hell up.

  -G.

  • [Antinous / Moderator]

    NOW; leave this person NOW; etc

    That’s why they have to keep doing it. They haven’t cottoned on to “ahora y siempre” yet.

    To paraphrase another thread, “You’re a hairdresser, not an exorcist!”

  • [Felton]

    Exorcist: Now! Leave this person now!

    Demons: But we just opened this case of beer…

    E: Now!

    D: Look, man, it’s the middle of the night.

    E: Now!

    D: I think we have squatter’s rights.

    E: Now!

    • [Anonymous]

      juepecta: I snorted. Literally. Thanks for the giggle!

• [Anonymous]

  I was wondering where this video was taken?
  I lived in San Francisco’s Mission District for over 3 years before moving away to the Pacific Northwest. A roommate and I lived in a two bedroom apartment with another two bedroom apartment in the entire building. Our neighbors were an immigrant family from Central America that were heavily religious. One night we started hearing chanting in Spanish, that evolved into screaming in Spanish, that evolved into chaos. At first we just thought “They are having a Christian party.” But when the screaming started up which was really frightening. Luckily we had someone who spoke fluent Spanish translate for us what she could hear. Welp, it turned out to be an exorcism or a similar demon cleansing ritual, that eventually moved into the hallway we shared. It was an experience we will not soon forget. It was both frightening, confusing, and annoying all at the same time.

• [Day Vexx]

  Haha, your apartment sucks. /Nelson

• [jaypee]

  Exorcism? Sounds more like a creepy SEXorcism to me…

• [TheRealSiliconDoc]

  You know these exorcisers are really rude. They do all their whiggy jhiggy stuff, and we find out they could give a damn where the demon(s) go once they get rid of them.
  So, yeah there ought to be a fewe laws against releasing demons from the possessed. It’s like having the flu and sneezing in the face of adjacent human.
  No, it’s like dropping the mashed candy bar back in the grab bag so the next participant gets the junk.
  You already touched it, it’s yours !
  You already sold your soul in sin, live with your demonic burden!
  I don’t know they had better work on public relations and come up with a little glass demon catcher with a cork or something.

• [Anonymous]

  But what if the demon doesn’t speak Spanish? Does he have to push one or something?

• [Jwilliam]

  XXXorcist outtake?

  • [Anonymous]

    “In the name of God, I command thee now. Now, thou goest, now. Now, thou goest, now.” Lather, rinse, repeat.

• [Anonymous]

  “by the power of christ I command you to leave, NOW” but the phrase changes a little on every repeat and I cannot hear very well

• [Knuckledusters]

  I love when people omit important letters and/or misspell shit while attempting to be didactic jerks. She forgot the R in exorcism.

  LOS SEXORCISTOS FOR THE WIN.

• [Genteel Bartender]

  What penmanship!

  • [Jaan]

    I was thinking the same thing!

• [Xeni Jardin]

  AHORA!!!

• [jonathon212]

  POOP I got the format bassackwards! Is there a name for that kind of obstinacy mixed with dyslexia? Is it even dyslexia if you swap the entire syntax around. I guess in Latin it would be alright.

• [WaylonWillie]

  A WHORE A!

  • [nicleT]

    Ha ha ha ! XD

• [Boba Fett Diop]

  Luego!

• [cymk]

  And here I thought I was suffering with a neighbor and their noisy yip yip dog.

• [Anonymous]

  No translation needed. Same dialogue you remembered from the Exorcist or any of those hip ghost hunting/exorcism shows the kids watch today is suffice to understand.

  Guess the girl in that apartment had to exorcise “Sabado Gigante” from her brain. Nice!

• [boingvad]

  Ahora?

  No communications on those frequencies, captain.

• [JohnCJ]

  I saw this earlier today in a NWS environment. I assumed the vid was sex sounds and the note a comically passive aggressive attempt to get the neighbors to quiet their passion. Eh. Either way it’s funny.

• [agentouchie]

  hail satan

• [Suburbancowboy]

  I think they were playing Virtua Fighter, and the guy kept playing as Akira.

• [GeekMan]

  “Okay people, I’m registering sexorcism.com. Let’s get on this.“

• [Haro!]

  Hey preacher guy, I’m happy for you and Imma let you finish but Catholics have the best exorcisms. In case you’re wondering, Catholic exorcisms require more formalities.

  • [lyd]

    You wouldn’t think so, but it’s still funny.

• [VICTOR JIMENEZ]

  If it was me I would had knocked on the door and said:
  “Mira, ¡¿Se podrían callar ustedes AHORA?!”
  “Look, would you mind to shut up NOW?”

• [Blackbird]

  Do it in latin… its for the best, they hate latin!

  • [skabob]

    From the comments, these people are probably Latin… wouldn’t whatever language they speak be Latin then?

    • [Jerril]

      By that logic, whatever language I speak is Canadian.
      שעד, איך באַפעל דיר צו פאַרלאָזן דעם גוף איצט!

• [Lt DirtyFreq]

  All I got was “now” Now Now… never heard the mention of “christ” because that would of been “christo”.. But he did say it would have to leave now & God (dios is god in spanish) was mentioned. Other than that, I can’t listen to it too loud without disturbing my neighbors.

• [Schorsch]

  This is why I own my own house.

  So people won’t leave snarky notes about my exorcisms.

• [Phikus]

  To be fair, it is hard to exorcise an entire apartment building. Do we know exactly what it was possessing?

• [Art]

  I was brought up in NYC apartment buildings.

  This exorcism actually more desirable than the perpetual smell of cabbage in the hallways :)

  • [neffezzle]

    Whats wrong with cabbage? I’d rather have an apartment building filled with the smells of people cooking rather than people trying to exorcise spirits like that because noisy neighbors are the worst things on the planet.

    • [lyd]

      I totally disagree, man. Smelly neighbors are the worst.

    • [Anonymous]

      Myself, I never really enjoyed the smell of boiling human flesh, but that’s just me.

• [Chupacabara]

  Man, Spanish tupperware parties sound BRUTAL.

• [Anonymous]

  That’s when you turn the volume up on Deicide.