Hilarious story of disastrous cross-country move with dogs


45 Responses to “Hilarious story of disastrous cross-country move with dogs”

  1. Brainspore says:

    Oh please, not another “cats vs. dogs” flamewar…

  2. AndrewF says:

    Ally’s blog is brilliant. I like her alot.

  3. Barry Wilson says:

    @#21 I see what you did there.

  4. Anonymous says:

    The sheer range of noises our dog could make was impressive,but the funniest was the chattering whine he’d make when he seriously wanted something (like the Christmas turkey)) – his teeth would actually chatter as he whined and drooled.

  5. Anonymous says:

    After all the dog and vomit talk, can we please have some unicorn poo?

  6. Emo Pinata says:

    The story of her dogs are always great, especially with the neurotic need she has to make her dog feel good about itself despite the clear blissful ignorance it lives in.

    My personal favorite story is the one about the fishing trip she took as a father. I am actually saddened by the thought of her running out of stories from her childhood.

  7. lava says:

    Dogs like car rides, head out the window, because its like running with none of the work

  8. faithmanon says:

    Allie Brosh is a goddess and rules the internets. That is all.

  9. tallpat says:

    Champion of the internet right there!

  10. rootboy says:

    Hyperbole and a half is one of the funniest things out there now. This girl is insanely talented.

  11. cowtown says:

    I love H.5 so much. I end up sending almost every one to my wife, even though I know she subscribes to the RSS feed too. As a dog person, this one is doubleplusgood.

  12. Stefan Jones says:

    I think whoever raised my dog took her on a lot of trips. She loves the car, and seems to “understand” the concept of a temporary dwellings. Once I show her a motel room, she seems to know that it is our place, and accurately drags me back when she’s done walking.

    I hope this bodes well for any future move.

    Dogs eating vomit? I think that’s a feature. Makes cleaning up the carpet a lot easier. Kira once ate a pocket gopher, chucked it up, and ate it again. All of it. Bones, fur, guts, everything. Really, it was easier cleaning up the stain than it would have been to scrape up a fairly big chewed-up rodent.

    • The Mudshark says:

      A bit of a messed-up story: Years ago I went to a beer-fest in the countryside (ugly business generally and not a favourite pastime of mine). Afterwards, on the way to where we were staying, one guy threw up inside the car that was taking us. The owner calmly told him “not to worry, I´m just going to let the dog in later”.
      The dog positively couldn´t wait to get in, wagging it´s tail enthusiastically and jumping with joy. Twenty minutes later, there was not a speck of vomit to be found, and the dog probably hammered from the ingested alcohol.

      • Ugly Canuck says:

        One creatures vomit is another creature’s sustenance. What is to be counted as “waste” is strictly related to the specific organism under discussion.

        Ain’t ecology grand?


        I personally try not to be disgusted by the life-habits of non-human organisms…and sometimes I even succeed.

        • The Mudshark says:

          I wasn´t disgusted. More intrigued and quite a bit amused, mostly by the equanimity of the car´s owner, indicating that this was somewhat of a routine procedure.

  13. Stefan Jones says:

    I found something my dog wouldn’t eat.

    A food something.

    A year or so ago I bought, on impulse, a package of “Gansitos” snack cakes, from the Mexican-based Bimbo Bakery.

    Gansitos are “chocolate”-coated twinkie-like things which in addition to “creme” filling have a little dribble of supposedly pineapple flavored goo inside.

    I ate half of one, and it didn’t taste right. Not at all.

    I picked apart the various parts in the other half, and tasted them individually. Nothing tasted actively bad except the chocolate coating. Think, candle wax flavored with carob and burnt toast.

    Then I whistled for my dog and put the half down on the ground for her. Kira picked it up, mouthed it, and put it back down. I encouraged her to try again. She licked it, sniffed it, looked at me and walked away.

    Good dog!

  14. Fraulein says:

    Hyperbole and a Half FTW

  15. Crashproof says:

    That’s okay, I hate it when people anthropomorphize people.

  16. Anonymous says:

    The video in her archives about “Cat Safety Propaganda” had be rolling on the floor. “Cats: They have sharp parts. Do not pet when angry.”


  17. kaini says:

    allie truly is queen of the internet. i check her site daily, hoping upon hope that there’s a new blog entry.

  18. Anonymous says:

    I have a couple of dogs that eat _much_ worse than vomit. And, yes, their attitude is ‘I made my own food! Yay!’

  19. spool32 says:

    oh, that was hysterical! :)

  20. Mythus says:

    I love Hyperbole and a Half. Her posts never, ever fail to make me laugh hysterically. I started reading it back in April and it rapidly became my favorite blog on the internet. … With the exception of BoingBoing, of course.

  21. Grimnir says:

    I love that blog so much. Basically every single post since she started doing drawings with them is total comedy gold, many of them downright eye-wateringly tongue-blisteringly funny. The earliest stuff is kinda hit or miss, but she fairly rapidly found her stride.

  22. alisong76 says:

    HaaH is one of my favourite blogs. I’ve learned not to open it at work due to the shrieking-with-laughted factor.

    One of the best of the lot is This Is Why I’ll Never Be An Adult.

  23. Rich Keller says:

    DogStarMan, are you Sirius about that?

    I think I know why dogs like vomit. Adult wolves will gorge themselves and then return to wherever their pups are. The wolf pups will start licking at the adults’ mouths, causing them to regurgitate. Then the pups eat up the vomit. So, I figure that vomit is kind of like baby food for dogs and brings back memories of happy times. Nostalgia is funny that way.

    Remembering this the next time your dog tries to lick your face might be enough to make you gag, which is okay. Your dog won’t mind at all.

  24. shannigans says:

    Her post on why I’ll never be an adult pretty much sums up my life. Love.

  25. Nword says:

    My vet said that riding in a car isn’t the most enjoyable experience a dog can have, they have a much higher range of hearing than we do, and it’s quite possible that car engines make noises that we will probably never hear (but they do..).

    That said, my dog likes going in the car, because we usually take him somewhere he likes to go.. for example, the mountains.

  26. thequickbrownfox says:

    Proverbs 26:11 “As a dog returns to its vomit, so a fool repeats his folly.”

    Former Australian Prime Minister Paul Keating was fond of quoting this text in regards of the Conservative opposition.

  27. Anonymous says:

    Darn, this is tooooo gooood!!!!

  28. Anonymous says:

    That picture is great. Any chance we can get a larger size?

  29. DogStarMan says:

    I hate it when people anthropomorphize animals.

  30. ackpht says:

    I have seen a Newfoundland lap up the black, slimy, hideously stinky gack that came out of a drain that had been stopped up for a long time.

    There is precious little that a dog will not eat.

    • Ugly Canuck says:

      Dogs have a much much more developed sense of smell than we do; and, as smell contributes so much to the taste of food, I like to amuse myself by thinking that the canines feel that we are fools – for not joining them in their “feasts”.

  31. pretzellogic says:

    Not a dog person, Cory? No kidding!! Is ANYONE at boingboing a dog person? Nothin’ but cats on BB! Sleepin’ cats! Keyboard playin’ cats! Kittehs (whatever the hell that means) and cats with poorly spelled phrases attributed to them!
    Spend an afternoon with a dog. You will soon realize that cats are really no better than squirrels as companions.

    • blueelm says:

      A lot of us developed our distaste for dogs precisely because we *have* spent afternoons with them.

      I like animals that know how to leave me alone.

      • Antinous / Moderator says:

        Look at me.
        Look at me.
        LOOK AT ME!
        LOOK! AT! ME!

      • kaini says:

        Heh, I had to go and er… ‘drain the lizard’ earlier and left the bathroom door open, because I was alone in the house except for my dog. Who just sat in the landing, staring at me in a very unnerving manner for the duration of the urination and grinning, in the way that dogs do.

        All I could think of was Allie’s dog and *thinks:’TRIANGLE CIRCLE SQUARE’*. I would have PMSL, was I not already P.

      • Ambiguity says:

        A lot of us developed our distaste for dogs precisely because we *have* spent afternoons with them.

        I like animals that know how to leave me alone.

        I would suggest not procreating, if you haven’t already.

  32. Anonymous says:

    A friend was complaining that the dog kept bogarting the cats’ food. To a dog there’s no such thing as “cat food” and “dog food”. There’s just “food” and “not food”. And frankly, they’re not so sure about the existance of “not food,” so they have to test that theory on a regular basis.

    • MrsBug says:

      OMG, so true. We had a very nice boxer for a while and he was constantly going into the bedroom where we had the litter box for a “scooby snack.” Totally foul to have him walk out with cat litter around his muzzle, wondering what all the shrieks of disgust were about.

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