Glenn Beck's brain


Mother Jones and Steve Brodner bring us a MAD-Magazine-style exploded diagram of the contents of Glenn Beck's brain, just in time for the news that the weeping millionaire goldbug conspiracy nut is going off the air (if life were a Warren Ellis comic, he'd reappear as a presidential candidate).

What's Inside Glenn Beck's Brain?

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    1. I was gonna say! And no section for anti-semitism? Seems like a big part to miss. “Personal Recovery Narrative” should just be “Bootstraps!”

  1. Check out the comments on the Beck article on csmonitor.com. They read like the scribblings on the men’s room wall at the John Birch Society annual meeting.

  2. I don’t think it’s drawn to scale. By my reckoning there should be a significant amount of empty space in there.

  3. The guy acts like a freak and I suspect he is merely an entertainer cashing in like Limbaugh but for the few times I have watched clips I have never thought him to be racist.
    In fact I often find as much or more racism in the form of patronizing from the left than right, maybe projection?

    1. @rebdav: Yes, yes; progressives are notorious racists. See “I’m not racist, You’re racist” above.

    2. In fact I often find as much or more racism in the form of patronizing from the left than right, maybe projection?

      Yes, it is entirely possible that you are projecting your racist attitudes on whatever you define as “the left”.

  4. Shariatal Lobe! Perfect. Oh, and in before the butthurt “GlennBeck makes some good points and it’s childish to mock him” comments.

  5. If you’re not getting the neuro puns, you’re not getting the full humor of the artist. Shariatal ~ pareital, basal ganglia, good stuff.

  6. He’s a funny guy. He’d be much funnier though, if he was joking, and a third of the country didn’t take him seriously. Good thing FOX finally gave him the sack.

  7. I’ve never watched a single Glenn Beck show… He’s just too power-preacher-snake-oil-salesman for me to stomach him.

    Maybe he means well, but he destroys all that by running around like Chicken Little screaming that the sky is falling.

    1. Eh, I don’t somebody can say the things he says and “mean well”.

      I agree with the snake oil salesman part you said though.

      1. It depends on whose definition of “well” you’re using. Yours or the person committing the action… I don’t think most people wake up and say, “I’m going to do evil today!”, or, “I can’t wait to play these suckers like saps!” Certainly there are ones who do, I’m not denying that, but there is a part of people who tilt at windmills that sincerely makes them think they are doing what’s needed to make things “better” or right the wrongs. Each person, unfortunately, has a different concept of what “better” is. And some people who are honestly trying to do good based on their concept of what that is, actually do much more harm than good to society and peace.

        You see it in all classes of society, all religious affiliations, and all political parties. From crazy ladies who try to destroy Gauguin paintings to suicide bombers who slaughter anyone around, it’s all in the name of making the world better.

        1. Point taken. You are right, of course, that the crazies often do crazy and horrible things all while telling themselves the are doing “right”.

          Still, I think Beck’s motivation is less doing something right and more doing something profitable for Glenn Beck. Unfortunately for him, he doubled down too much on the crazy and people stopped watching and companies stopped buying ads.

          1. “I think Beck’s motivation is less doing something right and more doing something profitable for Glenn Beck.”

            Ah..yup, Beck makes 30 million a year. I doubt his leaving Fox will hurt him much. He’ll simply move his clown show somewhere else, maybe online, and his followers will only be more devoted because of the feminazi islamofascist gay agenda conspiracy against him.

            Glenn Beck, now on Hulu!

          2. his followers will only be more devoted because of the feminazi islamofascist gay agenda conspiracy against him.

            You forgot the Jews. Today at lunch time there was a guy outside the Fox News studios in Manhattan with a giant sign that said something to the effect of it being a Jewish conspiracy that Beck was leaving Fox.

          3. “You forgot the Jews.” — Oh not at all. As everyone knows, “the white male is the Jew of liberal fascism.” (Jonah Goldberg)

    1. Somebody wanna do Glenn Beck’s brain on drugs?

      It’s a little known fact that he becomes Alex Jones when drugs are ingested, in a kind of Jeckll / Hyde transformation. Notice how we’ve never seen the two together at the same place and time?

  8. Soros!

    My favorite Beckism was when he tried to insinuate that George Soros engineered the whole mortgage crisis,because Soros made a profit while others who invested in mortgage securities lost money.

    Never mind that Soros was telling everybody to *avoid* buying mortgage securities long before the bubble burst. Not exactly typical pump and dump behavior.

  9. if life were a Warren Ellis comic, he’d reappear as a presidential candidate

    Don’t say things like that! You never know who or what could be listening!

    *wards off evil eye* puh! puh!

  10. For more laughs, I love visiting “Tea Party Voices” a blog that truly reads like the scribbling on the mens room wall of a John Birch Society meeting:

    http://blog.timesunion.com/teaparty/

    I’m not sure what is funnier, the tea bag bloggers, or the wingnut commenters who egg them on.

  11. I’ve been listening to Back on radio recently. I can’t tell the difference between him and Alex Jones. They have literally the same sponsors and tout the same conspiracy theories. Beck says “I believe” and “maybe” where Alex Jones would say “we know” and “it is proven”.

    Oh and he is deeply passive aggressive where Alex Jones is a bull dog.

  12. whats?
    it’s not a brain..

    As a brown dude living in a Muslim country, I’ll just say that Mr Beck is the West’s radical cleric. There isn’t any difference between the crap religious scholars say and what this guys says to incite hate and violence against people they don’t understand, except that if course the clerics are (for the most part rightly) branded as terrorists and Mr Beck makes $30 million a year.

  13. “Seriously, no Hitler section?”

    Keep in mind that here is shown only the right hemisphere !

  14. I’m what’s generally referred to as a liberal around here (the States), myself, but it is my opinion that Beck, Coulter, et al. are really plants bent on making the other side look terribly silly— sort of like PETA has some points, but they are overshadowed by idiot press releases concerning “sea kittens” and milch humans.

    This is a wonderfully funny cartoon, but I must formally acknowledge that the Nazis *did* call themselves socialists, and had many programs that lived up to the name… however, I think most people found the whole “genocide” and “trying to take over the world” agendae more objectionable than their efforts on behalf of increasing the availability of public kindergartens and building autobahns.

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