Bike-seat-clamp with a built-in bottle-opener

Discuss

72 Responses to “Bike-seat-clamp with a built-in bottle-opener”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Note that the bottle must be held horizontally while prying off the cap. I hope you don’t mind pouring a little beer on your bike.

  2. Jon Hart says:

    As I promised, I put together a montage of Devin and I picking up our bottle caps after opening the bottles. These shots didn’t make it into the original video because they killed the flow. Now they get their own place of honor! Check it out

    http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/swarm/nectar-and-elixir-seat-clamp-bottle-openers/posts/68277

    • SamSam says:

      Ha! That’s great. Glad you posted that.

      Although, as a snarky internet commenter, I can’t help but say… this only highlights the problem of a fixed-position bottle opener, particularly one low down: you can’t help but drop the cap, and then have to go bending down to retrieve it after you’ve opened it. Hmmmm…. maybe it needs a net under it….

  3. Clark says:

    The “little nub”? It’s sideways.
    I’m sure hipsters crave the challenge of opening bottles and returning them to vertical before spilling. Perhaps it makes automatic the toast to absent couriers?

  4. Anonymous says:

    I can do the same thing with my gas cap.

  5. stabby13 says:

    The seat on my Swobo has an integrated bottle opener.
    Admittedly, I have never used it.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Seems like a neat idea but where I live having quick-release *anything* on your bike is basically an invitation to have it stolen. I’ll never understand why quick-release components have become the de facto norm on new bikes; if it’s a race bike, fine, I understand why the extra 30 seconds might be important, but on a commuter all they do is make you paranoid about having your wheels stolen the second you turn around.

    • AlexG55 says:

      Actually, a quick-release front wheel is a useful anti-theft device- makes it easier to remove the wheel so you can get a D-lock through the frame, both wheels and an immovable object. Not so sure about seatposts, but useful if you want to change the height a lot, and I think some people take the seat off and carry it with them when they leave the bike (security, again).

      • knoxblox says:

        Yes, I always thought that the quick release seat was developed so you could take it with you.

        I assume that anyone who’s had their (presumably) permanently affixed seat stolen, and then had to ride home over several miles afterward, appreciates this.

        Of course, there’s the seat cable attachment idea, but it’s still harder to steal a seat that isn’t there in the first place.

  7. Treespeed says:

    Let’s see a seatpost clamp is $10 and a keychain bottle opener is $5.
    So the extra $10 is a hipster stupidity tax?

  8. Rhonan says:

    Is it just me, or is anyone else disturbed by the fact they are obviously littering by not picking up their bottle caps, and then they are planning to drive cars after drinking alcohol?

  9. wrybread says:

    Surprised to see so many negative comments. If you don’t like a beer after a bikeride, fly back to outer space and enjoy yourself, but leave the holier-than-thou attitude somewhere outside our atmosphere. This is a hilarious idea, and cheap enough to be playful. And anyone who’s ever tried a wall mounted bottle opener (isn’t that everyone???) should know that even though the bottle is sideways when you open it, you don’t actually spill anything. Its one of the great mysterious of the world.

    And as far as the 3rd nattering criticism above, how on earth do you know they plan to leave the cap on the ground? Something tells me 99.99% of people who just finish a ride in the outdoors will pick the cap up, even if (gasp!) it fell to the ground first.

  10. Lobster says:

    I see no harm in this. Not like people riding their bikes through vehicle traffic have any need for balance, coordination or good judgment. Besides, they’ll always have their fast reflexes in case of the emergencies they’ll inevitably cause.

  11. Signal30 says:

    What about an ashtray? I’d bike more if I just had somewhere to put my butts…

  12. Fang Xianfu says:

    Also in this product line:

    Bottle-opener tyre irons
    Bottle-opener pilot’s epaulettes
    Bottle-opener climbing belays and carabiners
    Bottle-opener ski poles
    Bottle-opener SCUBA tanks

    Fun game!

  13. Anonymous says:

    I’m finding it harder and harder to buy a bike accessory that doesn’t have a bottle opener on it.

  14. Anonymous says:

    Of course, if you’ve already got your chainsaw (and of course you do), the seat post clamp becomes redundant.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbK3-EfJd-w

  15. von Bobo says:

    this is awesome. I can’t count how many times I’ve been on my bicyclce when someone has stopped me and asked if I had an opener.

    Now I can say “Yes!”

    Once I go through my current supply of seat clamps, I will stock up on these bad boys!

  16. Jon Hart says:

    I was trying not to step into this discussion, but I feel like I need to. I’m one of the partners in Swarm (the guys behind this product), and I need to clear a couple things up.

    First, and most importantly, to the point of leaving bottle caps everywhere- of course we didn’t. We absolutely don’t support littering, and are glad that you pointed this out. We didn’t include the shots of us picking the caps up in the video because we were trying to keep it flowing. I’ll put together a montage of the “picking up the bottle caps” clips this weekend.

    Second, to the point of the opener being sideways. Did you watch the video? We opened bottle after bottle, and even spoke directly to the fact that it is sideways. Judge for yourselves, but everybody who has used one has successfully opened the bottle on the first try without spillage.

    Also, thanks for the publicity!

    That is all.

  17. Anonymous says:

    hey could you hold my bike up for me so i can open this beer?

  18. Anonymous says:

    I’m glad to see that we’re not the only mountain bikers who enjoy a beer…immediately after a ride!

  19. Anonymous says:

    The horizontal orientation seems a bit odd, but the real question is: why haven’t they included a small magnet to catch the cap? When I open a bottle w/ a lighter (or any other number of things readily available when I’m biking), I can at least keep the cap in my hand when I open a bottle. Using their design, the cap falls to the ground.

    Seems like an obvious and easy to correct oversight.

  20. millrick says:

    i’m a bit confused…
    …does one carry the beer with you on the bike?
    …or merely ride to the beer’s location?

  21. Anonymous says:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dA2zy0hLbs

    you’re not a man unless you open a bottle with your stem….or your teeth.

  22. Anonymous says:

    I wish they would have shown someone picking up all those bottle caps off the ground!

  23. salsaman says:

    Agreed, pretty dumb, especially since it’s sideways. Bottle opener FAIL. The saddle would be a better place for an opener.

    But the flip flops with the bottle openers are GENIUS. On a week-long Mexican vacation with my friends, my flip flops saved the day like 100 times a day.

  24. Anonymous says:

    As spectacular an idea as this seems, I should point out that in countries like Australia, if you are caught operating a bicycle with a bac higher than 0.05 you are liable to lose your license.

    • AlexG55 says:

      On the other hand, in many other countries (like the UK), while drunken cycling is illegal, it has no bearing on your car license. In still other countries (like Finland IIRC), it’s only illegal to be drunk in charge of a bicycle if you’re dangerous to pedestrians. This has the unintended consequence that once you reach a certain stage of drunkenness you’re legal to ride a bike again, as you’re so slow and wobbly that you’re not dangerous.

  25. Anonymous says:

    Drinking a niche microbrew on your fixie?

    Yo dawg, I heard you like being a hipster so…

  26. Victor Drath says:

    There’s also a BMX bike stem with a built in bottle opener. I think that one works with a bike right side up, where this one you’d have to stand it on it’s back wheel to avoid spilling the bottle.

    Semi-useless idea either way.

  27. Anonymous says:

    My dad had a gearstick nob with a bottle opener on it in his ’77 charger. He loved it so much we buried him with it after the accident.

  28. Snig says:

    You could also have a spirally type of wine bottle opener that attached to a hub. Could also be used to defend yourself from cars, Spy Hunter style.

  29. Lewie221 says:

    The always-entertaining BikeSnob already took this apart:

    http://bikesnobnyc.blogspot.com/2011/02/investment-opportunities-all-you-haters.html

    Excellent stuff.

    • SamSam says:

      According to that review, their kickstarter project had raised hardly any money, and the deadline was March 19th. So this must be at least the second time they’ve tried to round up support for this thing.

      I also liked the still from their own promotional video that included beer gushing down the seat post after bottle after bottle spilled when being opened in this bizarre sideways position.

  30. bobsyeruncle says:

    Fail.

    1. Just about everything is a bottle opener if you’re halfways creative. I noticed there were a few mentions of the cigarette lighter. Surely you could a few points on your bike that would work even if they weren’t specifically designed for that purpose.

    2. It’s the 21st century. Are there still a lot of bottle caps manufactured that aren’t twist-offs?

    • wrybread says:

      Yet anther person commenting who apparently either doesn’t ride a bike or doesn’t drink beer. Most bottled beer, and almost all GOOD bottled beer, for whatever reason, doesn’t have a twist off cap. Curse the gods if you want to, but no need to curse these guys.

  31. SamSam says:

    Wait, you can carry multiple bottles of beer to your destination, but you can’t carry a tiny bottle opener?

    Does the bottle opener not fit in that car’s giant trunk?

  32. moa says:

    worst thing about this POS is that it is made of aluminum. I’m sure you have all had those crappy aluminum keychain bottle openers. and we all know those get torn to shit by the steel bottle caps in no time. if they want my money they’ll have to build a steel one that goes on my handle bars.

  33. Sork says:

    Isn’t this what the SPD cleats are for?

  34. Anonymous says:

    People who can’t open a bottle with a lighter shouldn’t be allowed on bikes

    • penguinchris says:

      Why all the comments about opening bottles with a lighter? And you shouldn’t be allowed on a bike if you can’t do it? WTF?

      Do all cyclists smoke? I guess if you’re a fixie-riding hipster cracking open microbrews while you ride you probably smoke (hand-rolled probably), but these days it’s far from a given that people smoke.

      Not that a lighter isn’t useful even if you don’t smoke, but most people who don’t smoke don’t carry lighters regularly.

      That said, as a cyclist I do carry a bike multitool (which amazingly doesn’t have a bottle opener) and there are plenty of other things that will open a bottle using the lighter technique, including most small tools.

      Personally, I like the technique where you put the lip of the cap over the edge of something hard (somebody else’s table or piano, tall curb, metal sign, etc.) and smash down hard with your other hand from the top. You can almost always find something around you that this works with, so you don’t need to worry about bringing a tool, and it impresses your friends and shows them how resourceful you are :)

  35. foobiebletch says:

    having a frosty beer after a ride is a beautiful thing, but having a bottle opener attached to your bicycle is just silly. this, however, is awesome: http://surlybikes.com/stuff/jethro_tule/

  36. dragonfrog says:

    After transporting your beer by bike, you can get a really impressive beer volcano!

    When cycling to a party, bring non-carbonated bevvies, amirite?

  37. friendpuppy says:

    Um…tilt the bike to one side then use it?

  38. Anonymous says:

    I’m pretty sure 98% of the equipment I buy that has to do with mountain biking has a built in bottle opener. Its like a virus that eats anything to do with mountain biking. My multi-tool, my sandals, my lock, my frame.

    To steal a quote from the great movie classic Notting Hill, “if you can find a mountain bike related product without a built in bottle opener grab it quick, its a rarity and worth an absolute fortune”.

    Put a bottle opener on it == put a bird on it.

  39. hostile17 says:

    I was genuinely interested, until I saw the site.

    1) One of those “If you buy one, we’ll throw in not one, not two, but five free gifts. And wait, that’s not all” adverts.

    2) They look ridiculous.

    3) Suggesting people do maintenance work without a mask, when you know… there’s your mouth too… is ridiculous.

  40. pjcamp says:

    No way.

    Not going to Utah.

    Not even for beer.

  41. jordan says:

    The problem isn’t attaching a bottle opener to a seat clamp (especially for those who must keep their bikes in their apartments). That aspect is kind of cool, really.

    The problem is that this product is broken by design. They basically did it wrong.

  42. Lucifer says:

    Yeah it’s a perfect design except for two details.
    the orientation of the opener makes no sense.
    the location of the opener makes no sense.

    A horizontally placed opener on the stem makes it possible to crack open a cold one while riding. Now that’s how you do it.

  43. Zizekian says:

    my friend JUST showed me today the bottle opener on the fork of his walmart beach cruiser. I like the concept, I’m often around my bike drinking without having to ride home that night. I do not want a cheap aluminum quick release on my seat, though.

  44. kjulig says:

    Regardless of how useful this product is, they managed to get featured on at least two widely-read blogs and get their name out to thousands of people. Not bad if you ask me.

    • Halloween Jack says:

      Yes, they’ve had to extend their deadline on Kickstarter and cut their funding goal by 80%, and now people on one of the most popular blogs in the world are pointing out the flaws in their product. They’re livin’ the dream!

      • bmcraec says:

        Nowhere have I ever understood that great, practical, necessary idea outperforms a stupid, crappy, wasteful idea. Apple Mac circa 1993 vs. Windoze. Betamax vs. VHS. The Fax machine. Come on, zombie apocalypse, and put us out of our misery.

      • kjulig says:

        The way they explained it, when they fell way short of their goal they managed to find cheaper manufacturers with lower minimum runs which is why they are able to start production with less money.

        For the record, I think the product isn’t very practical and I hate that they show people littering in their promotional video, not to mention the concept of _driving_ somewhere to ride a bike. Still, it’s exposure for them and design doesn’t have to practical or indeed usable to be famous (c.f. Philippe Starck’s squeezer).

  45. lknope says:

    Number one cause of bike accidents? Drunk biking.

    • Anonymous says:

      Actually, the number one cause is cars pulling into the street from the right side without looking. Number two is facetious commenters with made-up statistics.

      • Michael Smith says:

        Actually, the number one cause is cars pulling into the street from the right side without looking. Number two is facetious commenters with made-up statistics.

        When cycle commuting I carry a yachtsman’s pocket knife. I has a flat screwdriver, a tool for shackles, a blade, a bottle opener, and a seven centimetre locking spike intended for opening knots in ropes.

        If the police ask me about it I will tell them I carry it for the bottle opener.

      • Anonymous says:

        And the number one reason for being avoided at gatherings is lacking a sense of humor.

    • knoxblox says:

      Most likely.

      However, a GREAT idea that doesn’t have to include alcohol, like say…Mexican Coca-Cola bottles.

      I do hope they include a warning against unsafe for illegal behavior with each seat clamp.

  46. Anonymous says:

    I believe Bike Snob pointed this out already but the orientation of the opener sets the user up for inevitable beer crimes.

  47. Opspin says:

    I wish I had 4000 to spare for one of their custom designed bikes, as bikes are so expensive in Denmark that they would probably make me one that was better than the ones I could get here, the problem is that it would probably be snatched up in customs :( and I’d have to pay an extra 25% :(

  48. Anonymous says:

    This exists already, in tons of versions. its just being done by computer/web/kickstarter people so it should be better/awesome/worthwhile?

    http://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHFX_enUS392US392&q=seatpost+bottle+opener

  49. CSMcDonald says:

    So they’re promoting drinking while riding?

  50. Anonymous says:

    Drinking and driving is not cool.

  51. Anonymous says:

    I always got a laugh out of the Reef sandals that have the bottle opener on the bottom. I thought they were a really fun idea. Even saw them used in person. Then I thought “What if you stepped in poop? What about all the other nasty crap you always step in? Now put the mouth of your bottle to this thing on your sandal that will trap it all.” Eeeew. Good luck cleaning that thing out too.

  52. zio_donnie says:

    Ehm, why not use a lighter for opening the bottles? Or any flat object like a key or something? Kinda pointless invention if you ask me, much like the flip-flops with a bottle opener.

  53. IndexMe says:

    All the above.. I stopped watching as soon as they showed them littering.

    That, and they are promoting drinking and driving automobiles.

    And isn’t there something about not drinking alcohol in Utah? Or did I remember that wrong.

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