Trailer for upcoming Planet of the Apes movie

[Video Link] This looks good. But I still think the John Chambers' ape makeup and the ape tunics from the original are unbeatable.


  1. Dear Hollywood,

    Try some new ideas. Also, stop casting James Franco. A box of wood carries a scene better.


    Your Remaining Customers

  2. It’s refreshing to know that there are other people in the world that believe James Franco will cause the apocalypse.

  3. Why is the image of something jumping at a helicopter (car, wolverine, an ape) in slow motion, the thing to have in movies?

    1. Why is the image of something jumping at a helicopter (car, wolverine, an ape) in slow motion, the thing to have in movies?

      This time, like every time, I secretly prayed for a ballistic miscalculation resulting in a dreadful mess sprayed over the camera lens.

      Some day my disappointment will end. Even if I have to do it myself.

    2. Why is the image of something jumping at a helicopter (car, wolverine, an ape) in slow motion, the thing to have in movies?

      Because if they showed the shot in real time your visual cortex would scream “THAT LOOKS FAKE!” even louder.

      That said, this movie already makes about a million times more sense than the Tim Burton version.

    3. Because helicopter shots are fucking expensive. I would imagine blocking off a highway in LA + hiring a stunt pilot + helo rental + the required flight/movie permits means the director wants to get his money’s worth for what would normally be 2.5 seconds (60 frames) of film.

  4. You see in that trailer where the woman, who seems to be a cardboard cutout standing in for the conscience of humanity, says that some things weren’t meant to be changed?

    Well, think of her as you decide that you prefer ‘Conquest of the Planet of the Apes‘ over this one.

    Mostly because there is 100% less Severn Darden in this one.

  5. I had my doubts, before seeing this and up to halfway through the trailer. But… that does look good.

    Meanwhile, there will have to be, in the history of the universe, a very last time someone says “meh”. I am patiently waiting.

    1. It will be the last second before the heat death of the universe reduces all matter to dust, thus summing up the purpose of life as we knew it: “Meh.”

      1. So the giant universal “OM” is one long prelude to the final “meh”? That seems about right.

  6. “Conquest” was always my favorite of the old Apes movies. Looks like this is the retelling, which also explains why they never looked like real gorillas, chimps, orangs, etc. Could be cool, might be boring, can’t be worse than the Burton fiasco. I’d still like to see more original stories though!

  7. I dunno, doesn’t it cheapen the irony of the original movie? Apes didn’t take over because of some experimental biochemistry, they took over because of the stupidity of man and his endless wars.

  8. I wanted to throw feces at the screen while watching that awful, awful remake with Marky Mark in it.

  9. Uggh. Yet another remake of an old film but (1) darker and more brooding and (2) takes itself way, way, way too much seriously than the first one.


  10. Call me old fashioned, but I prefer my scifi to be heavy on allegories for class and race conflict.

  11. Thank you, my dear fellow BoingBoingerz… I thought I was the only one who found Franco totally… nothing. I’m not sure he’s acting. I think he’s just saying stuff and being cute. Which I can do. Except for the cute part.

  12. Why hasn’t Boulle’s “Bridge Over the River Kwai” generated as many sequels and remakes?

    …can’t get enough of the “Colonel Bogey March”…..

    1. Because with Kwai, they got the film right the first time. (Actually, I’m quite fond of the original Planet of the Apes with Charlton Heston as well. But I can see the desire on the part of movie makers to update it with modern special effects. Whereas with Bridge on the River Kwai, it’s hard to see how they would improve on Alec Guinness and William Holden.)

      I only recently learned that the novels Planet of the Apes and Bridge over the River Kwai were written by the same person. This amused me greatly.

  13. Looks a lot like I am Legend. Sure, you could say that about lots of zombie movies, but this remake of a sequel looks like a direct copy. Of a remake. Yay Hollywood.

  14. The fundamental problem with these films is that the apes are more likable than the humans. Having said that, I would like to request a remix with songs from Rocky Horror.

  15. Okay, a gorilla leaping of a bridge for a helicopter seems like a pretty damn stupid gorilla.

    I also love how dramatically they doing science.

  16. WARNING: SPOILER (for the original films): The original POA movies came out when I was 9. When I finished the trilogy I was mostly blown away by the cause-effect loop. If I remember correctly, the last movie ended with a baby chimp being born of the two parent chimps that traveled from the ape-evolved future. The implication was that the baby would grow up and begin the ape-over-man revolution. My teenage mind could barely hold the thought. There was nothing that made the apes evolve quickly apart from the one baby…wait, I still can’t comprehend it! What appeals to me now is that it was only implied, never shown. They left room for the audience to participate by filling in the gaps. So, it looks like this new film might do away with that scenario. Too bad,’cause the time-travel cause-effect loop was so cool to me. They also seem to just be laying out the whole story in the trailer, no surprise, no audience participation.

    1. The other part of the original series lore was that dogs and cats, the pets of humankind, had died out because of a virus carried back by the POTA apes. There’s a shot of a statue memorializing dogs and cats in the original Rise movie. After dogs and cats died out, humans took pet monkeys as substitute pets, but they were found to be so helpful that they soon became slaves.

  17. Looks good, though I am tired of the typecasting of that older guy from Bourne Ultimatum and X-Men 2 always being the morally bankrupt bad guy.

  18. I never was much of a PotA fan, so the nuances of continuity or storytelling didn’t register with me as I watched the trailer.

    What did, however, was a nagging question: Even if they all became super-smart right now, would apes (as opposed to monkeys) really pose a threat to humans?

    Poking around, I think the answer is an unequivocal no, but the reason is sadder than you might think: There just aren’t enough apes left to be a threat.

    As of 2005, the UN estimated that there were as few as 350,000 apes left (across the 6 most populous species). That’s in the whole world!

    So, unless James Franco also invented some sort of ape clone-o-matic, apes taking over the world is just as likely as, say, the world being controlled by the citizens of New Orleans, Louisiana.

  19. My main question is: Where did all apes come from? They aren’t exactly plentiful in north america, even in zoos.

    Also, I have the horrible suspicion that the writers are going to confuse intelligence with education. Being made smarter won’t give them the ability to read or create bioweapons or the like.

  20. *seething with anger*…

    What the hell. Seriously did someone just mash up Deep Blue Sea, I am Legend, and throw in the monkey aspect of PoTA?…

    I think Mark Wahlberg did it better in that other remake, and that wasn’t a very good remake.

    Know why good zombie movies are good? It has very little to do with the actual zombies, it’s all in how the people survive.

    Where the hell is the cast of ZombieLand when you need them?

  21. I don’t mind James Franco too much (though I don’t think he’s a great actor or anything) but he’s ridiculously unconvincing as a lead scientist on a major project like this. He’s just way too young, and he looks younger than he actually is (32). It’s not even necessary to the story for him to be the lead scientist to be the lead character – if anything it would have been better for him to be a post-doc or something.

    Anyway, I’m a fan of the original films, and though this looks like it could be ok (though I agree that slow motion helicopter shots are ridiculously cliche…) I think a big part of the charm of the originals is the ape costumes.

    I guess it doesn’t really make sense to have the “evolved” ape form if you’re depicting how the apes came to rise up initially, so I understand their decision here to go realistic (as realistic as CGI can be, anyway), but it worked in the story arc of the original films, which also depicted their initial rise.

  22. I hope it has a just and happy ending! I.e. the apes win over, and dish out vengeance to, the human civilization that treat fellow animals as slaves.

  23. I watched most of the original Planet of the Apes movies on the hood of a station wagon at the Jolly Roger Drive-in in Cincinnati. No CGI could ever, ever replace that experience. Modernity, I scoff in your general direction.

  24. This is great. You guys are just annoyed because you don’t want to see some other animal being smarter than us and taking over the world. Boo Hoo. I for one welcome our new ape but also non-human overlords, and if the world ever does end FSM willing I hope it ends like this. I also hope the apes can talk (and I imagine they will be able to, looking at POTA history) so they can tell everyone how stupid they are, and have debates about evolution and stuff. And the un-caged apes will probably knock over the Statue of Liberty in this movie too.

  25. I hope that one day Rod Serling, of Twilight Zone fame, who wrote the original screen play adaption of Plant of the Apes will be recognized as one of the greatest writers of the 20th century. His Patterns play was the bookend of Death of a Salesman.

    There is a fifth dimension, beyond that which is known to man. It is a dimension as vast as space and as timeless as infinity. It is the middle ground between light and shadow, between science and superstition, and it lies between the pit of man’s fears and the summit of his knowledge. This is the dimension of imagination. It is an area which we call The Twilight Zone.
    —Rod Serling

    1. I think he already is, at least by those who care about such things – he tends to be mentioned in the same tones as Paddy Chayefsky.

  26. The Lawgiver states that any ape who sees a helicopter just off of a bridge has to make the jump, and Ape Law states it is so, “‘Cause that’d be pretty bad-ass, dude.”

    (The codifiers of Ape Law were not unaware of their spectacle. The bits in Ape Law about throwing poop are pretty impressive. Seriously, it’s like Civil War renactors.)

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