House stolen


22 Responses to “House stolen”

  1. Anonymous says:

    Jeremy was only able to hover over Ontario for a short time before the fuel levels went critical. Luckily, he landed the ship safely near Proton Station, but where would he live? How would he blend in with his new neighbors on this strange new world? Then he recalled an ancient Earth saying from the broadcasts, “home is where you hang your hats.” This gave him an idea…

  2. Nash Rambler says:

    “The property owner initially produced documents proving the home was his – although these were later found to be fraudulent.”

    POLICEMAN: Sir, this is a Stuckey’s placemat with the words “THIS IS TOTALLY MY HOUSE, EH” written on the back in crayon.

    THIEF: Hey man, it’s notarized.

    POLICEMAN: Sir, notary stamp marks generally do not feature puckered lips and the slogan “sealed with a kiss.”

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      Yeah, laugh about it, but first listen to this. I (and half the neighborhood) had a restraining order against my crazy neighbor. When I called the police to report him on the property, he just said that he lived there. And the police were perfectly prepared to believe him. Since I had a copy of the RO, I had proof. Had he been a thief, it would have been quite hard to get the police to remove him since I would have no way to prove that he didn’t live there.

  3. Anonymous says:

    If you ever had your house stolen… you might be a redneck

  4. Phlebas says:

    Reminds me of “Bank Shot” by Donald Westlake.

  5. gths says:

    I give 8 points for audacity but I take all of them back for being stupid enough to steal something you can’t hide.

  6. OrcOnTheEndOfMyFork says:

    The thief previously had a record of shoplifting.

    As in, he stole entire shops off their foundations, no doubt.

  7. johnnyaction says:

    This is why you put your double wide up on blocks and at least take off the tires.

  8. MrJM says:

    It’s novel to see a home stolen by someone other than a bank.

  9. tom frenzy says:

    I teach in a high school whose students come from Dundalk (not Dundee). I have to say my students love this story and love it even more now that it (somehow) made it onto Boing Boing!

    Strangely enough, this housenapping is part of a trend. It’s not uncommon for teenagers to “borrow” someone’s rv or trailer for the night by hooking it up to their truck and carting it away over the fields to party in for the night, only to bring it back the next morning trashed and covered in mud. They seem to get the biggest kick out of parking the borrowed rv in the exact same spot as they found it in.

    Nice mental picture: rural teens careening across fields in scrap yard mud trucks with the lights off towing stolen trailers.

  10. kpkpkp says:

    The suspect’s only comment was “Lahey can go f*** himself”….

    • penguinchris says:

      Haha, I was thinking there was definitely something very Canadian about this story, and that was it. Forgot about that show (haven’t seen it since I last spent a lot of time in Canada several years ago).

  11. Anonymous says:

    Proton Station?

    It may be 10 kilometres north of there, but I bet they only have a vague idea of the home’s velocity.

  12. angusm says:

    Probably just a publicity stunt to promote a forthcoming “Grand Theft House” videogame from Rockstar Games.

  13. Anonymous says:

    The thief previously had a record of shoplifting.

  14. Anonymous says:

    A friend of mine worked in collections in MS some years ago. He would repossess delinquent mobile homes in exactly this way. At some point the loan company decided the bad publicity outweighed the financial recoupement and fired him. But he had a great collections record there for a while.

  15. Hamish Grant says:

    Today I Learned there is a place in Ontario called Proton Station.

  16. sconnors says:

    I heard Ricky, Julian and Bubbles are out of jail.

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