HOWTO bake an apple pie with no apples


16 Responses to “HOWTO bake an apple pie with no apples”

  1. Alex says:

    I never was too good at baking apple pies to begin with. The “invent the universe” part always confuses me.

  2. Dewi Morgan says:

    I have long been looking for the recipe for an apple pie with no apples, just crackers, that I had heard about in my childhood. Thank you :)

  3. Stefan Jones says:

    I remember the mock apple pie recipe on the Ritz box when I was a kid!  I think my mom told me about the Depression connection.

  4. Wow! Comment spam! I’ve never seen comment spam here before.

    … or did you killit already?

  5. knijon says:

    Not exactly a Depression buster, but I’ve made a mock apple pie with zucchini and cream of tartar that mirrored this recipe.  Couldn’t tell the difference and a great way to use up that excess summer zucchini.

    • siloxane says:

      My mother does this also. She has a vegetable garden and frequently has more zucchini than she knows what to do with them. I’ve never had the Ritz cracker mock apple pie, but the zucchini version is reasonably convincing.

  6. Chris Siren says:

    Speaking of creating the universe, the Cosmos episode from which that
    quote comes streams on  Hulu here: and
    appears in the opening segment during the first three minutes.

  7. Lobster says:

    The pie is a lie!

  8. bcsizemo says:

    I can see the depression having an effect on the price of apples, but in general it’s not hard to keep them out of season, especially if you are just making pie filling.  It wouldn’t take much to turn the standard pie filling into a can-able recipe, and viola apple pie year round.

  9. Rks1157 says:

    A similar recipe could be found on every box of Rits crackers in the early 70′s (maybe earlier. Andy Griffith was still pitching them —”mmm mmm. Everything’s better when it sits on a Ritz.”). My mom made it. Getting us to eat it was the trick. It tasted like mealy apples.

  10. parfae says:

    I made this once for a laugh, and, admittedly, it was fairly convincing. 

  11. sstair says:

    Speaking of speaking of creating the universe, the song “Glorious Dawn” by Colorpulse mixes clips from Carl Sagan’s Cosmos, and begins with that quote.

  12. brerrabbit23 says:

    Could you not just add malic acid from the supplements shelf to generate the desired “tartness”?

  13. Applejack ain’t amused, sugarcubes…

  14. m m says:

    my mother is a renown trixtrix, and this is her favorite of all time.
    when people tell her that it is the best apple pie they’ve ever had,
    she smiles, says, thank you, and that she’s glad to have made them happy.

    ..april 1st was always hell in our house.

  15. Guest says:

    Read Vegetarian Cookbooks online here:
    Fascianting vegetarian cookery books dating back to the 1700′s.
     Percy Shelley has one. Ads for ancient ‘Health Food ‘ stores are great.
    October is Vegetarian Month, free recipes and techniques here

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