1. The Customer Is Usually Wrong. Ensure they understand this by sending them illiterate, angry emails. That bitch got told.
2. It's Not A Lie If You Believe It. Mayor of Boston come on Bud you run a show that’s all you do.
3. Devote your hypothetical 125-strong PR team to a smear campaign of the gatekeeper who runs a key conference where you sell your clients' products.
4. When pretending to be your own former business associates, reply from your personal email address; bonus points for using this address on anabolic steroid advice forums.
5. If You're Wrong, Be Boldly Wrong. Bloggers never pay attention to carbon copied customer service complaints!
6. Name drop people who already loathe you, in a medium with a permanent record.
7. When cornered, claim that it's everyone else who is being unprofessional.
BONUS: 3 rules for Twitter stratagy.
1. If your name is not available on Twitter, change a random consonant or vowel until it becomes available. No-one will notice the difference.
2. Buy 20,000 followers, but only use the account to harangue abused customers.
3. Instead of changing your account handle when the heat is on, abandon it completely so that someone else might take it.
This gadget does exactly as promised: it looks like a thumbdrive (sort of) and fries the circuitry of any computer it’s plugged into. It’s made from camera flash parts, is charged with a standard AA battery, and delivers a 300V zap of DC destruction to the port for all your USB-murdering needs. Note that this […]
The Cobham catalog, exposed by The Intercept, features countless pages of surveillance gadgets sold to U.S. police to spy on American citizens: tiny black boxes with a big interest in you. In the creepily bland feature lists and nerdy product names is a whisper of a dark future; perhaps darker than anyone can imagine.
This image depicts the most commonly-found stylesheet colors on the web’s top sites—Paul Hebert did an amazing amount of analysis and this is just one of the intriguing visualizations he came up with. Most of these are obvious staples, especially HTML red and blue, though it’s interesting how far the blue “cluster” is from the […]
The Boing Boing Store’s Gift Guide is full of ideas for pretty much anyone in your life like hipster ice cub trays, Xbox controllers, Halo Boards, and even diamond necklaces. As always, all products in the Boing Boing Store come at great discounts, too. Shop by price bucket starting at under $20. Under $20:Bloxx Jumbo Ice Trays […]
Unlike traditional lighters, the SaberLight features an electronic plasma beam that’s both rechargeable and butane-free. This sleek lighter is even approved by TSA, so you’ll never be stuck buying lighters you’ll just have to throw away partially used. For some people, like me, this is a pretty big game-changer. The SaberLight’s beam is actually both hotter and cleaner […]
Holiday shopping is in full swing, and the Striiv Touch is one of the best gift ideas I’ve landed on. Its simple design works for females and males, and its wide range of features makes it suitable for even the non-fitness enthusiasts in your life.Unlike traditional fitness trackers, the Striiv Touch also acts as a smartwatch. It […]