Scottish gentleman is bewildered by newsreader's amazing appearing pen

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http://andrushka.net/ Scott Cushman

He’s not just some “Scottish gentleman.” That’s Brian Limond, aka “Limmy,” who is a somewhat famous professional comedian best known for “Limmy’s Show” on BBC 2 Scotland.
- http://twitter.com/PsychicWhoosh Michael W.
  
  He is hilarious. I am so glad to make his acquaintance. Thanks for the info.
- bluest_one
  
  Limmy, the only person to ever block me on Twitter because I challenged him over some terrible pro-capitalist, anti-protestor tweets he made (which he subsequently deleted).
  - http://twitter.com/clickting James
    
    Ah, so you’re one of the people who take everything he tweets 100% seriously? He spends his time being a contrary troll, fishing for the credulous. You got caught.
    - bluest_one
      
      I presume I’m speaking to a fan, but I had no familiarity with him up until that point. I wouldn’t know anything about “everything he tweets”.
      
      If you want to insult me and call me “credulous” that’s your call but I’d have more faith in your judgement on this matter if Limmy hadn’t shoved half a dozen of his tweets down the memory hole as a result of the backlash he got from them.
      
      If someone’s going to be ‘controversial’ it seems they should at least have the spine and conviction to stand by what they say, instead of scurrying to hide the evidence.
      - marilove
        
        Maybe he was just tired of dealing with clueless gits who weren’t getting his humor?
      - Guest
        
        and if someone is going to be a sucker, they should do it whole hog and from atop a high horse. bravo sir.
      - bluest_one
        
        [Apparently you can't reply beyond a certain threshold of comments, so there's no reply button to marilove & mdhatter03, so I'll do it here.]
        
        Your defence of Limmy might might have looked better if you all hadn’t just responded with ad-hominem insults. Are you guys typical of his fanbase? You might do him more favours by just being quiet?
      - http://datashade.livejournal.com/ DataShade
        
        @ bluest_one Two buddhist monks leave a monastery to purchase supplies in a nearby town. One monk is an elder of the temple while the other is a novice on his first journey outside the monastery walls since taking his vows. On the way to the town, they come to a river, but where there should be a shallow ford, they find the river is instead several feet deep. A young woman sits by the shore, crying, and the elder monk asks “child, why do you cry?” “I was supposed to bring medicine to my grandmother, but the river is full and I fear I will not return home in time.” The elder monk strips off his robe, picks the woman up onto his shoulders, and carries her across the river. The young woman thanks them both and runs to the town while the two monks continue at a more sedate pace. The monks reach the town and take lodgings, where, in private, the young monk cries “brother! we have taken a vow of chastity, we are not to touch women for any reason! I cannot believe you would defy the law of our temple!” The elder monk replies, “brother, I put that woman down hours ago. Why are you still carrying her?”
      - Marktech
        
        @openid-118050:disqus
        
        “Two buddhist monks leave a monastery to purchase supplies”
        
        Coincidentally, I quoted that story to my father-in-law earlier today.
        
        Also coincidentally, I was reminded of the Four Zen Monks Of Usenet, who were under a vow of silence:
        
        “Why do people think this thread worth commenting on?”
        “Shush! You know there’s no point commenting on this!”
        “You’re both fools for bothering to respond.”
        “All three of you who have spoken are wrong: I’m the only one wise enough to remain silent!”
sigdrifa

Some people are easily entertain… oh. Gosh. I just realized I just watched the whole thing all the way through.
A Nonny Moose

Is it bad that the most intriguing bit (for me) was what the announcer never got to finish saying about chest hair vis a vis elections?
- iCowboy
  
  It’s not just you. I’m also desperate to know why chest hair was making headlines that day.
Mitchell Glaser

The guy’s accent is intense: “Nae pen, pen!” should be a meme.
- neapel
  
  the YouTube comments are working on that. His other videos already have been flooded with that… plus they took the tradition of quoting every single line and turned it fun: “But then that mystery got replaced by a BAGEL MYSTERY. —LiamTheWombat”
- iamlegion
  
  CHEST HAIR!
http://twitter.com/NotSoNiceville Grant

I think the biggest mystery is, what was the news story about chest hair?
- http://meterandmath.wordpress.com Meter Andmath
  
  I Agree. What on earth were the next few words in that sentence? O_o
beemoh

For bonus fun, put the subtitles on, and see how YouTube’s transcription software handles Scottish accents and slang, considering how artfully it mangles perfectly clear regular English.

Spoilers: it manages “fuckin’”.
- http://symbioid.livejournal.com/ Dave
  
  Burnistoun deals with this topic quite well…
  
  http://youtu.be/5FFRoYhTJQQ
Stitch

“Nae pen, pen!” is the new “Back and to the left”
hbl

Yeah, that’s Limmy, his other youtube videos are incredibly funny and terrifying in equal measure. He also popped up as the unintelligible scottish window cleaner in The IT Crowd.
mkultra

This is how I hear the Wee Free Men…
http://twitter.com/PsychicWhoosh Michael W.

I want to hear his analysis on this chest hair story.
Paul Renault

Y’know, Limmy, there ARE other vowels besides ‘e’ and ‘o’, eh.

But, really, everyone knows that the best reason to go to Oban is for some Fesh’n'cheps weth broen soss at Norrie’s.
- CLamb
  
  Not in Scotland; the English took them. But consider the plight of the poor Welsh who had nearly all their vowels taken by the English only to flaunt them by placing them as silent letters in words–such as the “e” on the end of many words.
  - http://twitter.com/oddsocket Cal Bryant
    
    Yw tk tht bk! Ys Wlsh Dnt lk yt wyn y tlk lk tht!
    - DyingAtheist
      
      Oddly I read that as a geordie accent…
  - Gordon JC Pearce
    
    Depends where you are in England, and where you are in Scotland. I sound like a 1950s BBC newsreader compared to anyone from south of the Watford Gap where they only have one vowel and it sounds kind of like “uye” – “The ruyne in Spuyne…”
theophrastvs

gratuitous assertion without any data (aka: typical comment): English has the broadest bandwidth of all living languages.

think about it: Louisiana drawl to Scottish brogue and it’s still understandable – amaz’n! (must have evolved-in error correction redundancies up the wazoo) so let’s hear it for the Queen’s: best damn language on the f’n planet! yeah! (jingo jingo jingo)
- http://www.doggo.org doggo
  
  Oh aye. China and India have a goat load of dialects and languages many of which are non-mutually-intelligible. Yet English can be understood from Manhattan to Perth (going west).
  
  ‘Course if you’re from the Mid-west U.S. of A, like I yam. Then it helps if you’re drunk when talking to the likes of Limmy (’cause basically all English speakers end up sounding like Scots when they’re drunk*).
  
  *I kid! I kid because I love! I love the Scots!
Zero Sonico

Nea Pen Pen was a friend of mine from Vietnam.
RJ

David Robertson is a mystery wrapped inside a conundrum wrapped inside an enigma wrapped inside another mystery. By pointing this out, Limmy is messing with dark forces no mortal was meant to look directly at.
http://noctilucent-studios.blogspot.com/ Noctilucent Studios

Wow….what a great way to finish out 2011. Hilarious.
Stephen M

Hah! love it, more bewildered scots needed ASAP.
http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=706402809 Chuck Spidell

Limmy!
Bodhipaksa

It’s because of this spirit of enquiry that Scotland was able to give to the world inventions such as the pneumatic tyre, the macadamised road, the postage stamp, steam engines, the telephone, television, and mammalian cloning.

In other words, we fuckin rock, ya bastards!
- petsounds
  
  Roads paved with macadamia nuts? That sounds like one tasty mode of travel.
http://halfbakedmaker.org Robert Baruch

I will preface this by saying that I absolutely adore every UK accent. Each one is like music to my ears. That being said, “Nae pen… pen!”
harvey the rabbit

“Yesterday David revealed his grandfather had taught him the pen trick – and he had been doing it on news shows for years.” – Nov. 2009

http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/showbiz/2008/01/27/bbc-newsman-s-disappearing-act-78057-20300140/
- http://twitter.com/ManekiNico Maneki Nico
  
  The dateline on that story is actually Jan 27 2008.
  
  Choice quote: “Limmy’s YouTube clip has had almost 7000 hits in 12 days.”
  
  Viral had a lower threshold then, I guess.
keith mccann

Limmy’s great! I love Adventure Quest http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sYPiUSwLmzQ
chrisspurgeon

I’d love to see what this guy would do with a double rainbow.
http://twitter.com/digitalArtform Joseph Francis

Have you ever tried any … Saurian brandy?
bobcorrigan

The best laid schemes o’ mice an’ pens
Gang aft agley,
An’ lea’e us nought but grief an’ pain,
For promis’d joy!
pstarr

that was strangely relaxing.
- Phoc Yu
  
  Especially if you turn on snowflake mode.
Petzl

What is the Bagger Mastery? I must know.
- Jamie Norwood
  
  It involves sheep, I am expecting
Edamame

There’s Two Series worth of Limmy’s Show on the BBC.
He takes a lot of risks with his humour. It’s experimental..
When it works it’s as funny as the Pythons. Limmy rules!
kartwaffles

I love his accent. Google audio transcription is hilariously wrong, too: “I don’t see octane desiccated fellow harvesting cacao!”
noah django

I greatly enjoyed this.
anna reser

I read all of these comments in his accent. NAE PEN, PEN!
eli laztanguren

Why has this silly story such a succes? And why are most of the people commenting here male? “Nae pen (nis), pen (is)” Do you get it guys?
- noah django
  
  >eli
  >And why are most of the people commenting here male?
Anon_Mahna

Think of me as just another giggen yank, but I was highly enthralled listening to his accent. I spent 30min+/- after the 1st watch trying to copy the pronunciations.
oliver schmieding

…just showed this vid to my son (who started to learn english about a year ago…)
his expression went from ’nae frown’ to ‘frown’ in about 5 seconds…priceless :)
https://plus.google.com/104067355242126774300/posts?hl=en Dennis Smith

Does this guy need glasses? It’s in his other hand FFS!
bigidiot

Am I the only one who was actually holding out hope for a rick-roll?
http://echofox3.blogspot.com efergus3

Old Scottish joke: Why do the Scots wear kilts? Because the sheep can hear zippers being undone from miles away. (Ferguson)
http://twitter.com/Listener43 Listener43

F*ing Pens – how do they work?