Did you know that Nokia has a "luxury" subsidiary that makes phones for stupid rich people?
As the European cellular industry's supernumerary nipple, Vertu has long specialized in calculator-display brickphones that look like dragon poo rolled in gemstones. It oozes along the dried slugtrail of progress, having just announced its first touchscreen Symbian handset--sure to be an LG Prada-killer!
In spite of its claim to be the "pinnacle of mobile phone excellence worldwide," the sad reality of Vertu's obsolete junk shows how alien the gadget business is to sellers of luxury. Technology's R&D-driven elements of quality and credibility are now so fast-changing as to be inaccessible to them. Even the most clueless class aspirant appreciates the power that new technology exerts over traditional tokens of extrinsic self-worth; it's better to just get a gold case for a standard-issue iPhone.
Though the company's future is uncertain--Nokia is reportedly trying to offload it--Vertu still understands the communication needs of oil wives and drug dealers better than anyone. Pictured above is the "Data Cable", featuring "High Speed USB 2.0", on offer for $190. With tax and shipping, that'll head well over $200 for a cable you can buy at monoprice for $2. Talk about charging what the market will bear!
Even a standard lithium-ion battery will set you back $90.
The V Collection Bluetooth Headset at least has the same unique, vaguely-80s design as the handsets themselves; but what could be more illustrative of the "invisible clothing" problem than its $790 price tag? Apart from the $1300 cases with names like "Signature Precious".
Chester (or Shasta?), a Red Labrador, has figured out a way to deal with the Roomba that’s more efficient than barking at it or biting it: turning it off. [Thanks, Heather!]
An EU court ruled against a seller of customized set-top boxes this week, with the judge saying that his preinstallation of certain Kodi Add-Ons makes the boxes illegal to offer. Mr Wullems sells, over the internet, various models of a multimedia player under the name ‘filmspeler’. That device acts as a medium between a source […]
AquaGenie is “the world’s smartest water bottle,” a $70 internet-of-things device that “knows your water goals” and will connect to the Internet to inform you if you have met them. AquaGenie is your daily companion that keeps you on track and fully hydrated, helping you achieve all your health, wellness, fitness and weight loss goals! […]
Bamboo has lots of uses beyond just being panda food. Things like bikes, roads, scaffolding, and musical instruments are made from the fast-growing grass. But unless you are participating in a tropical-themed LARP, you probably wouldn’t want a shirt made from bamboo stalks. So why do bamboo bed sheets make any sense? Because yarn extracted from […]
If you want to work in tech, but don’t have any desire to code web apps to help businesses sell things to other business, you might want to consider a career in cybersecurity. Judging from the apparent complete infiltration of Russian hackers in American cyberspace, it seems fair to speculate that there’s a major shortage of […]
All moms are different. But all moms like getting flowers on Mother’s Day, and that’s a fact (not, however a fact we can document in any fashion.) Instead of getting chewed out for forgetting to call her on the second Sunday of May, you can take care of it ahead of time with Teleflora’s flower […]