[Video Link]. Yes, this remix video is months old, but you probably missed it—and it's not like stuff this weird ever grows old. The song is here. (Thanks, Tara McGinley!)

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Boing Boing editor/partner and tech culture journalist Xeni Jardin hosts and produces Boing Boing's in-flight TV channel on Virgin America airlines (#10 on the dial), and writes about living with breast cancer. Diagnosed in 2011. @xeni on Twitter. email: xeni@boingboing.net.

MORE: cat • cats • Funny • Kitteh • meme • music • pets • video • Weird • WTF

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lisaz

It’s really sad that Xeni feels the need to promote animal cruelty like this. As a woman, I’m very ashamed to have her in the sisterhood.
- http://www.xeni.net/ Xeni Jardin
  
  please tell me you’re joking. if not, I’m going to die ROFLing.
  - nosehat
    
    You’d better not post a link to the Muppaphone then!
    - http://www.xeni.net/ Xeni Jardin
      
      good one!
    - Sparg
      
      I was waiting for Chuck Barris to hit the gong.
  - irksome
    
    Reported to the ASPCIB… those legs look like they’ll buckle any minute.
- usonia
  
  Of f’chrissakes. Have you never had a cat that enjoys a solid beating? Seriously, my cat loves nothing more than having her lower back bongo’d upon…at least I ASSUME she loves it: her purrs & purry-mewling suggest pleasure, but I might’ve been reading her reactions all wrong for the last 12 years.
  - technogeekagain
    
    Yep. Done properly, lightly drumming on a cat works the same way chopping massage does on humans. And, especially through a microphone, it sounds like a much more solid hit than it is.
    
    People are more likely to rough-house with dogs — among other things dogs solicit it more, and aren’t as likely to catch you with a claw if overexcited — but cats can enjoy it too. The cat has to trust you, and you have to trust the cat — but then again, that’s true of a lot of play with cats and kids and other small creatures.
    
    And as always, it’s your responsibility to pay attention if your playmate says “not now” or “enough”.
    
    (I just got a look from one of mine: “Hey, I was nibbling on that finger!”)
    
    Note that the cats voluntarily came to _him_ for this game. It may or may not help that they’re ‘Meezers, since Siamese tend to be more human-oriented than many cats.
    - marilove
      
      “And as always, it’s your responsibility to pay attention if your playmate says “not now” or “enough”.”
      
      Cats make that easy: They have claws!
      - goopy
        
        Sadly, most owner declawed them before they can be used…at least the owners I know.
      - marilove
        
        @goopy:disqus Thankfully, I don’t know a lot of people who do that. Ugh. So lazy and cruel. :/
        I have a kitten (about 8 mos old) and she keeps climbing on my window screens. She demolished one!I will nto be delcawing her. Instead, I’m going to purchase more things for her to claw, and I’m going to replace my screens with pet-proof screens. ’Cuz I’m not an asshole.
    - oasisob1
      
      We’re still talking about cats, right?
      - technogeekagain
        
        Yep. Though I admit deliberately muddying the waters.
        
        There’s a bumper sticker on my van: “If you believe in declawing cats, raise your hand” — with a picture of a human hand missing the first joint of each finger. The parallel is accurate.
  - SomeGuyNamedMark
    
    I’m not saying you are wrong but just wanted to point out that cats will purr even when they are obviously in distress. I seen cats do it when being held down and given a shot at the vet’s. I’ve heard theories that this is a self comforting action.
    
    The fact that the cat is not only staying there but arching into it makes me assume it isn’t hurting it.
    - marilove
      
      Cats won’t stick around if they don’t like what’s going on. You’ll know when a cat is unhappy: They will either run, or claw your eyes out.
      - SomeGuyNamedMark
        
        The ears back will be your first tip.
    - http://www.facebook.com/teal.scott Teal Scott
      
      Sounds like the purring was the kitty conveying “Give Daddy his medicine…”
    - Robert
      
      Sure, they purr. But they also obviously look like they don’t want to be there. Having seven cats of my own, I know the look.
      - technogeekagain
        
        We agree that we (and my two) disagree on this. I don’t see objections, and I know mine don’t object to a bit of light percussion. I suspect the hits on the ironing board bother them more.
      - marilove
        
        Erm, they could easily just … jump off the ironing board. Cats aren’t gong to stick around if they’d rather be somewhere else. Also, their tails look fine (not fluffy or wapping around like crazy), and their ears are not back. Those are two signs that a cat is not happy. They look content.
  - http://www.nathanhornby.com/ Nathan Hornby
    
    Although I agree with your main point, purring can be as much a sign of nerves or fear as pleasure.
    
    So actually, she might hate it.
    
    But the real sign that these cats aren’t being creuly treated is the fact that they seem to go to him to get a little drumming action. I’ve never known a cat that doesn’t get away from, or attack, things it doesn’t like.
    
    And I hate animal-cruelty-as-entertainment videos as much as the next animal lover.
- Robert
  
  *head* *desk*
- gothicgeek
  
  :(
- Jason’s Robot
  
  I’m pretty sure it’s something the cat likes and does on a regular basis.
  
  Otherwise it wouldn’t have come jumping up on the ironing board when the guy drummed on that.
  
  My friend had a cat which liked being swung around in a bag. From the outside observer it looks kinda scary – But rustle a bag and the cat came running, then put said bag on the floor and the cat jumped in and would wait for the ride.
  
  No. It didn’t start out with a full swinging the first time. The can liked being in grocery type bags anyway and they were swung gently in the early days.
  - technogeekagain
    
    As with kids, a trust game depends on building trust.
Brainspore

It was the next logical step.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9nGyPz9uT0
- BobRH
  
  I knew that one had to be coming here someplace – can’t believe I never caught the “mouse organ” reference before though!
http://twitter.com/Pandertroll Philip Chinn

First the video then the first comment made me LOL so hard!
Benjamin Coblentz

this is stupid. s.t.u.p.i.d.
- marilove
  
  Um, duh. This is the interent. i.n.t.e.r.n.et.
  - francoisroux
    
    Man, I so clicked on that and Google said it can’t find the i.n.t.e.r.n.e.t.
    - Antinous / Moderator
      
      Welcome to Disqusistan, where a period with no space on either side is a web address.
    - marilove
      
      Oops! Google Chrome could not find i.n.t.e.r.n.et
      
      –
      UH-OH! I think this video killed the internet.
Thomas Zaraat

My siamese cat enjoys that sort of thing too
- marilove
  
  Yeah, my long-haired cat really likes rough lovin’, too. ”PET ME! NO HARDER! HARDER! HAAARDER!”
  
  Ahahaha I just creeped myself out.
  - koko szanel
    
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hngIzzQ0XZc
    - marilove
      
      Oh god I remember that episode. hahaha.
GawainLavers

“I got a fever, and the only prescription is more cat slapping!”
Navin_Johnson

Cat slap fever
duh duh duh duh
cat slap fever..
- Brainspore
  
  Sadly, when Ted Nugent performs this song the cats rarely survive the ordeal.
- http://twitter.com/WpgCameraMan Rock Hardwood
  
  You’ve helped us end the cruelty of cat-juggling .. Mr. Johnson, can we count on your support for this?
  - Navin_Johnson
    
    ”Roll the ugliness”
  - technogeekagain
    
    Cat Juggling: The Flying Karamazov Brothers did that at least one, in a show taped for TV. It’s on Youtube.
    
    (For those who don’t want to bother: “Paulo Barechesto” briefly accomplished this by shuffling cats on a counter. It’s a valid cascade even if no cat was ever thrown…)
http://www.facebook.com/people/Smash-Crate/100002608840736 Smash Crate

There is no animal cruelty going on here. The vast majority of cats love to be slapped on the meat of their behind and you can do so with surprising force without them complaining. In fact, their purrs usually just intensify. Your bond with them will strengthen.

In my experience, this works best with female cats as they tend to have more muscle in the rear quarters, while males have their spine more exposed, so I recommend softer slapping for males until you find the “sweet strength”.

Certain breeds may not take to this kind of activity, but every cat I’ve ever had has adored this, as strange as it may seem.

Ease your cat in softly and pick up the force with time until you understand their tolerance.
- mguffin
  
  OK, “the sweet strength” thing. I think you just bad-touched everyones mind a wee bit there…
  - Navin_Johnson
    
    “The sweet strength” is also sometimes known as “the special purpose”.
  - noah django
    
    show us on the doll where he said the “sweet strength” is.
- Blaise Pascal
  
  “Ease your cat in softly and pick up the force with time until you understand their tolerance.” <- Isn't that from Terrence Sellers' "The Correct Sadist"?
- irksome
  
  You’ll also need a “safe word”.
  - technogeekagain
    
    Nip, or swat, or depart are all pretty good safeword-equivalents.
    - irksome
      
      One scratch says she’s lost control again?
- SomeGuyNamedMark
  
  My cat likes it though I wouldn’t do it as hard as this guy. He also likes having his head lightly patted to. He’ll raise his head and tilt it back to get into it.
MT_Head

One of our cats really enjoys being spanked. Takes all sorts.
- SomeGuyNamedMark
  
  You know what they say about owners and their pets resembling each other.
http://noctilucent-studios.blogspot.com/ Noctilucent Studios

One of my all time fav. songs now forever after associated with one hella weird ass video. Thank you?
- winter67uk
  
  No thank you. One of my favourite songs too, and all I could think was “Is this what our lives have come to? Did we all turn into overweight, balding, button down-wearing, ironing board-wielding cat slappers?” Really, I weep.
  - marilove
    
    Yeah, well, you took the time to log in and comment on such a video, so, you know, pot, kettle, all that.
irksome

Perpetuating the false stereotype that odd, balding, bespectacled and somewhat portly middle-aged men have no natural sense of rhythm.
- Donald Petersen
  
  Never mind the puss-pounding, my first thought was “This is what Joy Division fans look like these days?!”
  
  In my own private inner world, this fella would rock out to Steely Dan, or Michael McDonald-era Doobie Bros. If he got sufficiently liquored up first.
  
  Well, no, I’m not gettin’ any younger myself.
  - Roy Benevidez
    
    Yeah, I don’t look like that. Wait, yeah, I kinda do.
    
    {slinks away in shame}
Mitchell Glaser

It’s the ironing board that does it for me.
- technogeekagain
  
  What, no protests about abuse of ironing boards?
SomeGuyNamedMark

He left out the part where his cats pee in his closet to get revenge.
- Felton / Moderator
  
  … the video of which will be set to Twisted Sister’s “We’re Not Gonna Take It.”
- bibulb
  
  Upon the first cat slap, I thought “This guy’s gonna get cat poop on his pillow that night, isn’t he?”
gws

I wanted to watch him slap his cats for the full two minutes but the rhythmic dissonance was just unbearable. How hard would it have been to edit the slapping to even approximately match the beat of the song?
- marilove
  
  You take these things too seriously.
- Robert
  
  Dude, it’s a guy slapping cats. If you need it to be on the beat, you don’t understand the Internet.
- technogeekagain
  
  It clearly *was* edited to more closely match the beat. That’s the depressing thing.
http://nawel.tumblr.com Nawel

Best. Thread. Ever. The video and the comments. First comment is pure gold.
JoshP

oh, oh internets. oh you. you silly, silly internets.
bklynchris

I’m in Love
I’m in Love
I’m in Love with a Strict Machine…..
$19428857

I have had several cats with masochistic tendencies. The slapping thing, yes, but one loved to have his tail pulled.
http://twitter.com/sirkowski Sirkowski

PeTA will hear about this!
- technogeekagain
  
  People Eating Tasty Animals?
MandoZink

One of my female cats will annoy the hell out of me just to get me to bop her on the rear like this. She LOVES it! I have 3 males and 3 females. They all like butt tapping, but the one female is crazy about it! I can tell these cats are into it. They jumped up there on purpose. If they didn’t like it they would run off in an instant. I’m lucky to be typing this right now without a cat bugging me for attention.
Jason’s Robot

It’s odd – Boing Boing’s a tech and indie pop culture blog, yet it consistently loads the slowest and plays video the worst of any site I regularly visit.

woah is me.
Andrew Pam

Swedish massage! Our late cat Tripitaka once jumped up on the portable massage table when our masseuse made a house call and was setting up, so he started massaging the cat to see what would happen and he loved it. I would occasionally drum along to music on him too. I think oriental cats may be particularly fond of massage.
geessebeschleier

I can turn my female cat into a cat homing missile by doing this , i carry her around on one arm head pointing forward , make eye contact with my tomcat (who is about twice her size and weight) slap her on the bum a few times and drop her to the floor, it’s like seeing a torpedo bomber drop the said torpedo , she goes straight for him and here goes the “beating”.
Beating doesn’t last long as after a second or two the tide turns.If no line of sight, she goes into homing mode and looks for him.
My gf (who had never lived with cats) was quite shocked when she saw me giving them a “whooping” , point is , are they restrained in any fashion ? Nope, they could run away any time.
In fact, right now as i’m typing , my tomcat is making this operation a bit more difficult as i slapped him on the rear end a few times and he is now spread on half my keyboard
- MandoZink
  
  Our first cat, a female, used to park herself next to my wife with her kitty rump in the air. My wife would pat her on the butt a few times and then say “Go ZOOM!”. The cat would shoot out like a rocket and run like mad throughout the house. The cat thought this was great fun.
John Smith

True Faith by New Order might have been more appropriate.
cstatman

HOORAY comments, video, all of it. everything about this? total Boing Boing Wonderfulness!
John Jones

Oh man…they mixed him soooo behind the beat that it is painful, not cool.
Jerril

Another cat owner here with a cat who likes to be spanked, athough she prefers on the sides of the hips more than the… back of the pelvis I guess? I can bongo her butt back and forth between my hands like a masochistic pingpong ball for a minute or two before she usually wants a bit of a time out or something scratched. Time out is declared by lying down so her bum can’t be bounced back and forth, and a demand for scritches somewhere involves turning around and shoving the body part into a hand.

Or she’ll grapple a hand and start grooming it.

There’s a video on youtube somewhere of a cat who will drum the bed/chair/whatever after having his butt bongoed – the owner would drum on him for 15-30 seconds, stop, the cat would drum for a bit, stop, owner would drum on the cat, etc. Cute!

Joy Division's "Atmosphere," accompanied by slapped cats

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