At the Billfold today, a wonderful and mathematically precise post that explains exactly “how much money do I need to create giant floes of gold in a private vault and dive into it like Scrooge McDuck?” (thanks, Dean Putney!)

  • oasisob1

    I can’t say whether or not it’s mathematically precise, but gold isn’t the rarest metal:

    http://www.curiousnotions.com/home/metals.asp

  • http://profiles.google.com/max.kingsbury Max Kingsbury

    Obviously fake math. So fake that at the end: ”
    Matt Powers is in his early twenties-ish. _He is also good at making up fake math._”

    Math is srs bsnss!

  • aaronmhill

    Definitely read the comments section. 

    One person quotes the “Duck universe” article on wikipedia to establish the ACTUAL volume of the money bin.

    Another person quotes the specific quantity (some absurd Disney fake-number string) of dollars/coins that Scrooge has. 

    Multiple commenters correct (and snarkily chastise) the OPs very unprecise math.

  • Antinous / Moderator

    Would you settle for a golden shower?

    Note: You must click the link, not the image, to get to the correct time stamp.

    Thanks, Disqus, for forcibly embedding videos and then stripping out the time marker. You’re a real pal.

    • citizen

       As long as it’s not a Dothraki golden shower…

  • woid

    As of Uncle Scrooge comic #15, in September 1956, his fortune totaled one multiplujillion, nine obsquatumatillion, six hundred and twenty-three dollars and sixty-two cents.

    Accounting for later profits and inflation… Ah, just do the math.

    • woid

      Documentary proof!

      • http://deansli.st/ Dean Putney

        Now THIS is the type of investigative journalism I’ve come to expect from our commenters!

        • woid

          Scrooge looks upset because he’s just heard he might be only the world’s second-richest duck, edged out by Flintheart Glomgold. It finally comes down to their respective giant balls of twine, which they unroll across the African plains… 

          Ah, just read the comic. It’s still only 10 cents (as of 9/56).

  • pjcamp

    You can’t dive into gold. You can only dive onto it and bust your ass.

    • http://www.linkedin.com/in/kenahoo Ken Williams

      Yeah, I thought it would be physics-based, explaining how [much gold you'd need] to dive actually into it somehow.

      • relawson

         Right, just try pressing your hand into a jar of pennies. I would not be the first to try such a feat. I’d bet someone else that they could do it, first ;)

    • http://twitter.com/samthepea Sam Pourasghar

      If Scrooge McDuck were in fact the T-1000 I expect he’d be heavy any strong enough to blade-hand swim through the loose metal.

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=671015696 Leo Cortens

    That integral makes me cringe it’s so wrong.  Cubing the area? What?

    • Joel Phillips

      … and at what point did he fail out of chemistry class in order not to realise that a cubic inch of gold is going to weigh a lot more than an ounce?

  • cservant

    No offense, but reading the rest (well a good portion) of the site, The Billfold, just makes me even more depress.

    Is this a good reflection of the daily fianances of typical Americans?

    • penguinchris

      I found the site and its articles to be very odd. Not sure who the audience is. But it does, actually, seem like a good reflection of the daily finances of typical Americans, sadly enough. 

      The worst part is when you realize that these apparently are people who feel compelled to write about personal finance, meaning there are huge numbers of people who are much worse than the people on that site with their money. There’s a weird acceptance and even pride in having poor financial habits on there.

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_KLDXI7FI3NUHYC23SUHMGLNBCQ Tom

         This.

        I poked around and it looks like someone posting and reposting articles they found slightly amusing. It looks like it wants to be a serious site, but has no focus.

  • bagoombah

    Peter Griffin’s analysis of this concept was the most accurate I’ve seen so far, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMyk7MXsseg (Not Safe for Toons)

  • http://twitter.com/ambiguator ambiguator

    I stopped reading at “Given that 1 ounce of gold is roughly $5.00″

  • http://aqfl.net Ant

    Swimming in solid hurts. ;)