That tingling in your mouth could be a squid trying to mate with you

If you eat a male squid that has not been disemboweled first, you might end up with said squid's spermatophores—basically, sperm-filled packets—attempting to burrow into your soft gum tissue the way they burrow through the flesh of a lady squid. This apparently hurts. We know, because it has happened to more than one person and those cases have been documented in peer-reviewed research journals. (Via Hank Campbell)


  1. “Waiter — I have a question about the menu.  What’s the difference between these two squid dishes?”

    “Two?  Oh, wait, that’s the menu we use after 11pm.”

    “11pm?  I thought you closed at nine.”

    “Uh … I’ll just give you the proper menu.  Let me…”

    “And why are there pictures of people in black leather on this menu?”

  2. D:

    I feel the need for some kind of chaser, but unicorns aren’t enough. Maybe some nonoxynol-9 mouthwash.

  3. “I’ve probably had hundreds of spermatophores ejaculate on my fingers”

    Those lady marine biologists are like librarians, pretty wild when they get off work!

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