So, a Higgs Boson walks into a church...

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20 Responses to “So, a Higgs Boson walks into a church...”

  1. nem0fazer says:

    Looks a bit FSM to me. Just sayin’…

  2. agrovista says:

    A Higgs boson walks into a bar, the barman asks “what’s the matter?”

  3. aaronmhill says:

    From now on, whenever someone asks why it’s called “The God Particle”, I am going to say “it’s because of this dumb joke. It has nothing to do with God, really.”

  4. bzishi says:

    A Higgs boson sits down on a swivel chair. A coworker asks “what’s the matter?” The Higgs boson responds “I can’t spin.”

    • Richard Dagenais says:

      This one sounds clever; if we were at a party I would have laughed. But honestly it went over my head.

      • AnthonyC says:

        Spin is a quantum mechanics property that all fundamental particles have. Electrons, protons, and neutrons have spin- 1/2. Photons and many others have spin-1. The Higgs is predicted to be the only one with spin 0. Hence it “can’t spin.”

  5. BonzoDog1 says:

    I’m sure “God Particle” infuriates crazy Christians and Muslims alike. It reminds me that Fred Hoyle could have saved us all a lot of grief — and outfoxed the theologians — if he had named the origin of the universe “The Touch of God” rather than the “Big Bang.”

    • AnthonyC says:

      That would not served as well for his goal of mocking the idea, given the nature of public discourse at the time.

    • Timothy Krause says:

      A rarer, more fascinating discovery than the God particle itself would be someone of a secular bent who didn’t feel the need to cavil at the title “God particle.” Now that would be a rare discovery indeed.

    • Craig Brummer says:

      It’s even crazier to think that the original formulator of the Big Bang theory was actually a Capuchin friar, a Catholic priest.  One for the “Catholics love science” team.  Go figure.

  6. Tara Fredette Malow says:

    This joke was written by the brilliant and funny Brian Malow, aka @sciencecomedian. You can see the bit here: http://fora.tv/2009/11/08/Science_Laughs_Science_Comedian_Brian_Malow#chapter_07

  7. BDiamond says:

    The Large Hadron Collider actually opened a window into a parallel universe, in which Magnum, P.I. was real instead of a TV show. (Stay with me on this.) In that universe, Jonathan Higgins actually served in the British Royal Navy instead of the Royal Air Force. While in the Royal Navy, Jonathan served as the foreman of a deck crew. In essence, the Hadron Collider discovered … the Bosun Higgins.

  8. CLamb says:

    I would expect a Higgs Boson, or any Boson, would be more comfortable in a fundamentalist church.

  9. Teller says:

    Here’s the usually depressing Elizabeth Kolbert’s depressing pun: A Higg’s Disappointment?

    http://www.newyorker.com/online/blogs/newsdesk/2012/07/is-the-higgs-boson-a-disappointment.html

  10. timquinn says:

    Yeah, right. How is the bartender going to have a conversation with something that only stays around for a nanosecond or so. Talk about commitment issues!

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