British police call off lion hunt

Police in Essex, England, said Monday that they've found "no evidence to support locals' claims that they'd spotted a lion." [Reuters]


  1. There were several definitive statements from the police that the photos absolutely, positively showed a lion.   Here’s one of the photos.  Srsly.

  2. Follow up: in an attempt to prevent two dolphins from mating at a local aquarium an employee was returning from the seaside with two baby seagulls, since their cheeping is the only thing known to quell the amorous desires of dolphins. On his return trip he noticed the lion sleeping in the middle of the road. Unable to go around it he carefully stepped over it.

    He was later arrested for transporting young gulls across a sedate lion for immoral porpoises. 

  3. A man walks into a bar with a giraffe. They both get pissed. The giraffe falls over. The man goes to leave and the bartender says, “Oi. You can’t leave that lyin’ there.” And the man says, “No. It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”

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