Art crit generator

After rigorous study of the Instant Art Critique Phrase Generator, I conclude that with regard to the issue of content, the disjunctive perturbation of the spatial relationships brings within the realm of discourse the distinctive formal juxtapositions. "The Instant Art Critique Phrase Generator" (Thanks, Terre Thamelitz!)

• [An Infinitude of Tortoises]

  Sort of a watered-down Post-Structuralist text generator, eh?

• [Boundegar]

  I had friends in art school.  They really talk this way!

  I sat in on a class, but had to leave when I heard the phrase, “uniquely shrinelike juxtaposition of reifications.”  Many years later, I wonder if that means something.

  • [Saltine]

    Not to you it doesn’t.

    But I’m guessing that two things were brought into being, probably some physical representations of abstractions, and then, placed side-by-side, they sort of fetishize whatever the topic is in a way similar to a religious shrine.

    That’s not to say that there aren’t pretentious jerks out there. But the It’s-Greek-to-me pose is a pose too.

    • [Boundegar]

      Good guess.  But it’s still Greek to me.

• [Tsv1138]

  To be used in conjunction or response to an artist statement generator for a sort of “new aesthetic” Turing test.
  http://www.playdamage.org/market-o-matic/

• [tristan eldritch]

  Only art critic I put any store in:  (NSFW for language)

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N0NIs1fOkQg

• [d3matt]

  hehe…  glad to see I’m not the only one who put 12345 in the generator…

• [timquinn]

  We tried pointing and waving, but you non-visual types would not pay attention.

• [mindysan33]

  Is that Burroughs?  I love pictures of young Burroughs.  Because he is just a guy of think of eternally as an old guy, for some reason.  

  • [Gyrofrog]

     Was wondering the same thing.

• [Art]

  Finally!  Proof that there are no actual editors or writers at Art Forum Magazine.

• [blueelm]

  This is well and good, but I’d like to build one that uses actual bits of mechanically reclaimed criticism from which you could then construct a work of art. Now THAT would be fun.

• [Deidzoeb]

  “A celebration of line and form and color and the body human.” – cliche I learned from art appreciation class. If there’s no human explicitly pictured in the work, and if it’s too much of a stretch to imagine a urinal or whatever as a metaphor for a human, you can leave that part out. Pretty hard for any visual art to not have line or form, and even something in black and white could be interpreted as commenting on color.

• [Substance McGravitas]

   There is an excellent blog here that consists of poetry generated with a variety of programs.  One of those programs, JanusNode, is wonderful and kooky and klunky and free and also has an art criticism generator.

  “Ms. Evelina Thoodpoh’s recent work with best-seller lists presents us with a painstaking isolation, underscoring the obvious courageous neo-trope of top-40 music. This work, at once comely and rationalistic, extends the neuropsychological post-self-defeating naturalism of edging, symbolized by this artist as an enthusiastic mélange of rouged lips and a 547 microns long maroon and grey striped scarf with “orange” written on it. As consumers we exalt in recognition of how this pagan artist exploits the uncompromising display of talent/flowering. “