Show me where I did that.  What I said is that going through the stage where one is angry at one’s god is actually very common, not unusual at all in cancer.

This would be the second time, in fact, that I am making a point of stating that I am not questioning your friend’s belief in a god.

Perhaps your argument is with other posters, but it was easier to click on mine.

i am dismayed at the number of folks who do not hesitate to make a lot of assumptions about what i wrote without even clicking through –– but that is more than offset by the kind and supportive comments from people with and without religious beliefs.

(Small factual point: I have not challenged Lana on her beliefs, here or anywhere else.)

Imagine what it would be like if a serious medical condition you suffer from was virtually always referenced from within the framework of, say, Hinduism.

By believing that things happen for a reason, people set themselves up for all sorts of unnecessary angst.

If you don’t believe that things happen for a reason, you apparently live in a universe without cause and effect.

There are ways of making a point without being mean.  But then, to do that requires thought, intelligence and other traits that seem to be lacking in those who are quick to cram their ideas down the throats of others—-And… to do so in a way that is so close-minded.  I prefer to find common ground, to build a bridge rather than hurl a grenade.  If grenades make someone else feel better, I’ll just step out of the line of fire.  Live and let live, Like I Said.

And creative ritual CAN provide a modicum of comfort at a trying time. I’m reminded of Savina Teubal’s Simchat Hochmah ritual:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oylp2elmM8I
http://www.scribd.com/doc/71314040/Savina-Teubal-Simchat-Hochmah

On the other hand, I *can* cause myself to change beliefs in response to evidence about their factual accuracy. I can ask things like, “What should I expect the world to look like given the existence of an omnipotent, omniscient, omnibenevolent god? What should it look like given the nonexistence of such a god? How does the world actually look?”

My 2¢:
It does not matter what happens to us, only what we think about it. I won’t give example because we could never agree on what’s good or bad – because it’s ultimately subjective. The experiences we have – according to me – are lessons in consciously manifesting how you want to feel about life. Wanna suffer? Then your experience seems to focus on pain and discomfort and all the shitty bits. Wanna be happy? Then it’s a chance to discover more about how the challenges of life bring you closer to God, or brings people together or whatever it is that makes you happy. 

Being angry at G-d is still having a relationship. Being disappointed at a lack of appearance, or delivery of a much-desired request, is still having a relationship. Expecting the relationship with G-d (or spiritual community, or family) to always be easy, rewarding, or even understandable, strikes me as emotionally undeveloped and intellectually incoherent. We’re complicated, or ideas need to acknowldedge complexity, our relationships are going to be complicated. Everyone’s balance of the emotional and rational is going to be different.

Whatever keeps folks going through the hard times IS the right way. Given the historical record, the Jewish take on spiritual practice and deity has worked well for Jews. (How many 3000 year old communities of Greek, Roman, or Carthaginian Pagans remain? AFAIK, only Zoroastrians are also survivors from the Classical era). If skepticism or atheism are evidence-based as claimed, we must examine the lived evidence to judge whether belief is an effective, reasonable strategy for coping with adversity.

Perhaps the atheist/skeptic questions are “Which human needs are being met by belief?” “What aspects of belief are most helpful?” “Whom is belief best suited for, and who should try other methods?” “Which other approaches are at least as efficacious as belief?”. Rationality isn’t condemning folks for using what works – that’s prejudiced cruelty. Rationality is finding and encouraging what works best in each instance.

Surely acknowledging the reality helps?

The Erin Brockovich case was relatively easy to solve, because there wasa big source of pollution that was easy to identify and correct. Most cases of environmentally-caused cancers are lost in the noise, so to speak.

Based on what I’ve learned from her and from other reading about the subject, cancer is a byproduct of life and we’ll never eradicate it because it’s part of the way that our bodies grow. The best we can do is to acknowledge this, and adjust our perceptions and treatments of cancer to maximize quality of life rather than length of life. Dying in an ICU, as one of my workmates recently did, is seriously wrong.

Cancer is something that has always been really outside of my experience, but I’ve been paying more attention to it since Xeni began posting about it. (and admittedly since I started watching Breaking Bad around the same time) 

I was tempted to skip this essay at the mention of Personal Gods ™ but it’s not the point of the work. (nor Xeni’s post for that matter) Also, “I was over these platitudes.” was a plenty-good hook.

We spend so much energy looking for cures, and caring for those who suffer from cancer. But we rarely acknowledge that much of the cancer epidemic is entirely avoidable, if we just stopped filling the world with substances that harm us.

(*) That thought provoking statistic is from this report that just came out:
http://daraint.org/wp-content/uploads/2012/09/CVM2ndEd-FrontMatter.pdf