Ruben Bolling at 8:55 am Wed, Oct 3, 2012
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Good to the Last Drop Dead: Caffeine and Marathons
Yé-Yé Girls of '60s French Pop
Particularly good at archery man had me laughing hysterically.
I still can’t believe he gets to hang out with “genius who has a nuclear-powered flying suit of armor man” and “guy who is actually an immortal deity who people pray to and stuff man.”
I’ve been ranting about this issue for a while. Trick arrows and being a good shot could more practically be translated into other types of weapons which take less time to deploy (Batman’s grappling gun, smoke bombs, explosives, etc.). Arrows might be good for stealth, but that’s about it.
Somewhat good, but as I’ve seen products intended to reduce string noise, and myself have been alarmed at the sound of drawing back and releasing a bowstring, it’s use for stealth may be overstated
In the noise of the city no one can hear my bowstring, at least my chosen prey never does. That amounts to effective silence as I rid my city of the scum that prey upon the innocent. You know, BP execs and such. What? You think I’d go for small fry like drug dealers?
Patrick Bateman seems to have picked up a new hobby.
Less time to deploy? http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=ab9_1327240958
I dunno about the “barely competent with a …” part either. Most people with a pistol, as one drill sergeant put it, couldn’t hit the ocean from a dinghy and Tommy Guns were the classic “spay and pray” short range weapons.
Tommy Guns were the classic “spay and pray” short range weapons.
Any veterinarian who proposes to machine-gun my cat in the privates is not getting repeat business, let me tell you.
even if he says a prayer afterward?
“Well, actually…” :) Let me put my Comic Book Guy hat on here for a second.
You’re also dealing with universes where magic is real, telepaths casually walk the streets, and you get to pal around with “guys who are actually immortal deities.” Hell, let me put a really fine point on it: you’re dealing with a universe where things that Grant Morrison thought of are canon. There is absolutely nothing in the Marvel Universe that says you can’t wield a bow so well that you’re as deadly as Thor, because your meridians are perfectly aligned, you’re pure of heart, and/or you’re the only descendant of Hawkface, The Really Really Insanely Good Archer Guy.
Real-world ballistics and tactics do come into it, I suppose. But they’re not the final arbiters here, no matter how hard you’d like them to be, because they’ll always get trumped by the Rule of Cool. That’s not just a literary trope in a comic book multiverse, it is basic in-world metaphysics! If you’re gonna do fandom wank (and believe me, I am all for this activity, it’s a blast), shouldn’t you do it in the context of the world you’re discussing? This is a mythical reality and I really think you need to take that into account if you’re playing “what-if”.
I wasn’t only referencing Hawkeye, but any number of other archer characters in comic books – Green Arrow, Shaft, Golden/Black Archer, Red Arrow, Jagged Bow, etc.
Hawkeye, however, definitely isn’t as deadly as Thor, even in the Marvel canon.
Since the rules of the comic multiverse are flexible (i.e. excising characters or traits or doing total transformations via What If?’s, Elseworlds, Ultimates, etc. versions), it’s perfectly fine to suggest that arguably uncool archer characters who don’t know their skills were made obsolete with the invention of the repeating rifle over a hundred years ago, much less the repeating plasma cannons they co-exist with in the comic multiverse, shouldn’t be a part of the multiverse or given much attention other than as the comically inept character who wants to be a superhero/villain but fails miserably.
And also, all the not-invulnerable heroes (not including the nigh invulnerable heroes) who have a amazingly low level of permanent mortality despite routinely being shot (or at least shot at), blown up, irradiated, poisoned and stabbed. And the “Pucker up, Legolas” line only works with an archer character. “Pucker up, Annie Oakley” isn’t as funny.
I think you mean “Clench up, Legolas.”
The super-archer’s ability to reliably hit their target from a distance despite turbulence and long lead times implies that they can foresee and exploit the weather and the movements of their enemies. What do you think they do during the 23 hours 45 minutes of the day when they’re not spearing tin cans? The half-dozen apparent deus ex machinas that allow the good guys to win were all planned out by the precog with the bow.
Or if you’re a fan of the DC universe, he’s married (at least in some continuities) to a woman whose voice can shatter stone. He also hangs out in a League with a guy who has a power ring that can do anything he can think of; a guy who can run at supersonic speeds and vibrate through solid objects; a woman who could bench press him … and his house, can fly, and can move fast enough to deflect bullets (forget arrows); a man who’s nigh-invulnerable, can shoot lasers out of his eyes, and can fly; and the man who’s the world’s greatest detective and one of the best hand-to-hand combatants.
At least he’s not as lame as the guy who has all the powers of a fish.
OK, you made me laugh. Maybe too hard.
You made Aquaman sad!
Make a long form graphic novel of the Idiot Time Traveler…. I would buy it
Perhaps you already did. . . .
It would have been cooler if Antonio had issued this reply to his own post!
Actually Antonio’s first post was meant as a response to another that hasn’t been written yet.
He will have done it long ago someday, if he can ever find the time. Maybe he left it in his other pockets?
One of the best yet :)
“I know not who ate your lasagna” is so off that it irks me. “Know who ate your lasagna, I do not”, would be more fitting, surely? There’s enough empty space in the word bubble for the extra “do”; failing that, there’s “Who ate your lasagna, I know not”. The “Yes, Hmmm” comes across as a desperate last-minute attempt to rectify this oversight.
Bah, I’m overthinking this. At least the usage of the word “Yodie” is unexpected.
I think that Yodie is in fact attempting to use Yoda-like grammar. He’s just very bad at it because he’s a moron.
Surely it’s: Who ate your lasagna, Know, I do not.
Am I alone in not actually understanding any of these comics, nor finding them remotely funny? Nor for that matter, getting the “dancing bug” reference?
Maybe not, but you’re the only one bragging about it.
The comics themselves aren’t funny, but the meta-reference is hilarious for those immersed in certain zones of geekdom. Tom the Dancing Bug is just the name of the strip.
I thought this was simply a riff on the weird temporal bubble that many daily newspaper comic strips exist in, with its assumption of strict family and gender roles (‘mother-in-law’ jokes) and comic strips that just make the same stupid jokes over and over (‘Darthfield’).
I guess Percival has found out that everyone kills Hitler on their first trip, but he’s still trying.
He’s from 1909, so to Percival, Hitler is a futuristic science-fiction despot.
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