By Xeni Jardin at 9:07 am Mon, Oct 22, 2012
“I said ‘Good Day!’ ”
“Ballot’s just posted. All politics is background noise to me now”
“Yet another thing you can do with Star Wars, oh how exciting.”
“I find your lack of cat food… disturbing.”
I can barely fathom the naivety of the cat for whom to haz cheezburger was to be happy; and, yet, that cat was I not so long ago…
“I hate Caturmondays.”
“I don’t always drink out of the dog’s water. But when I do, I prefer to bully him out of my way.”
“Put the camera down and the teddy bear lives.”
OH GREAT, ANOTHER IDEOLOGUE.
… I just wanted to run down there and punch him out.
The cat is a Master. He needs no caption.
You went on holiday and left me for 2 weeks with complete strangers and you expect me to be nice to you…
No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.
whoa, dude. hivemind.
if i hadn’t had to re-size the file twice before Disqus would let me post it, I would have beat you!
You shared your political thoughts on Facebook again? Really? Reeeaaaallly?
“For a species that calls itself ‘intelligent’, you certainly do provide a great many counter-examples.”
No, I’m Jamie – Adam is the other one.
“We are not amused.”
Thats funny because I was going to say “Antonius is not amused.”
Lord Plushbottom considers how hard it is to find good domestic servants.
“We need to talk… about diabeetus.”
I am so fucking sick of this stupid cat meme on the internets. How is this still a “thing” after 10 friggin’ years?! (That’s the caption, but my thoughts as well.)
Clowns? Who’s still amused by clowns?! They’ve been around for friggin’ centuries already…
And don’t even get me started on puppets…
Please proceed, Governor
Yep, that was mine, too. :)
No. I do not have ‘a case of the mondays.’
I am not amused by your puny attempts to put words in my mouth.
Your insolence, sir, is matched only by your ignorance.
“Christ, what an asshole.”
You want to do what to my what?
No Mr Mouse, I expect you to die.
OMG that cat is looking too angry , amazing pic btw
I swear to god, if this ends up on the internet I am so crapping in your shoe.
It should just say “meh.”
“Tragedy tomorrow, comedy tonight!”
“Last night I heard a cicada.”
“Is Amy Schumer TRYING to be funny?”
“Of course my name is Steve Martin, do I have to put my ‘arrow through my head’ thingy on?”
I remain, as ever, unimpressed.
Mr. Fumpkins’ had grown increasingly bored by the 10-minute standing ovations he recieved as a matter of course. He was, however, now trapped by his imposed social conventions; forced to endure the applause for their duration as his accolytes endeavoured to show their loyalty and shield themselves from any perceived lack of vigour in their adulation and the inevitable horrendous consequences.
Plans for propaganda balloons are cancelled.
Another internet meme. How clever.
I find your lack of faith disturbing.
Great…another Apple release…
CARD SHARPER CAT KNOWS YOU GOT NOTHIN
Uh……yeah! BIG FAT HAIRY DEAL.
Gimme a TV and a good hot meal! I said a nap in the sun, a friend to go for a run, the only thing that matters is… how good you feel!
i *will* has cheezburger
“Your food-dish-filling initiatives of the last fiscal quarter have consistently fallen short of the expectations of the board.”
Why, Yes. I could balance the budget. I just don’t feel like it.
Set your phasers to.. KILLL
I have heard your argument and find it to be both preposterous and absurd. You sir, are a fool.
“And I care it’s Monday because…?”
“This cat is obviously not… READY FOR SOME FOOTBALL!”
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Do I look like a cat to you, boy? Am I jumpin’ around all nimbly bimbly from tree to tree?
“I don’t understand the question and I won’t respond to it.”
I will walk into the living room in the middle of your dinner party and start beating off in the corner and there is nothing you can do about it.
“The brochure CLEARLY stated that breakfast and lunch are included.”
Hold on while I finish taking a dump in your shoe.
Please. Spare me the details . . .
I….am not amused.
No, I *don’t* want to spit it out.
“My client is using his right to remain silent, your honor.”
My name says I take second place,
but take just one look at this face –
I’m not number two,
No silly, that’s you!
It’s a good thing God blessed me with grace.
Just got in from work and Siggy is tickled pink. Primo, however, is not. Thanks Xeni!
I FIND YR LACK OF CHEEZBURGERS DISTURBING.
It bores me.”
“Yes, you are
so very clever.”
(Alan Rickman voice over would be perfect)
“Soon, soon, Segundo will be … Primo!”
“All your kibbles are belong to me.”
Tuna? That’s not tuna. Kill him!
Just three more weeks in the Office of the Damned and then it’s me in a Speedo on the beach in Ibiza.
The cat pic – that is no pussy – It’s the Cylon of Athon.
Let’s explain, for brevity, here’s a list:
Number Zero: Cylon of Athon, last (known) survivor of the Feliform Cylon ruling model of the Original Earth.
Number One: John Cavil
Number Two: Leoben Conoy
Number Three: D’Anna Biers
Number Four: Simon O’Neill
Number Five: Aaron Doral
Number Six: Caprica-Six et al.
Number Seven: Daniel
Number Eight: Boomer, Athena
And…the Final Five, humaniform Cylons from the Original Earth, who convinced the Colonial Centurions to sign a cease of hostility with the Colonies.
Four of the Final Five were betrayed, their minds altered with synthetic amnesia and placed among the Colonial humans by John Cavel, under orders from _Number_Zero_: The Cylon of Athon – a Feliform Cylon, the only (known) survivor of the Ruling Model of the original Cylons of the first Earth.
“Oh my god, they’re going to make me the focus of another stupid meme.”
The cat looks so thrilled to have its picture taken
You are the one called Blizzard. I am from UNICAT. You are to be replaced. I am now in charge here.
I like to sing-a! About the moon-a and the June-a and the Spring-a!
Nonplussicat does not approve.
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