Woman raised by monkeys when she was a young girl?


62 Responses to “Woman raised by monkeys when she was a young girl?”

  1. Mitchell Glaser says:

    I don’t believe it. Sounds like the unverifiable fantasy of a bored housewife. If it’s true then she is one strong woman who will easily be able to laugh off my quite understandable skepticism.

  2. mappo says:

    Alternate title:  The Girl with No Shame: The Non-Credible “True” Story of a Girl Trying to Raise Money

  3. Funk Daddy says:

    It sounds so plausible and the super-human powers she obtained prove it is true. No one could climb a tree without first living as a monkey for five years.

  4. mtdna says:

    Obviously phony. She says she competed with pythons, but everyone knows pythons only live in Africa and Asia. (The Americas have boas and anacondas.)

  5. DreamboatSkanky says:

    Howard Fast wrote an excellent story called “The Trap” that takes as its staring point a study of feral children, and ends with… 

    I recommend it.  It’s in a collection called “Time and The Riddle”.

  6. Steve Stein says:

    I remember attending a talk by Misha Difonseca about 15 years ago, talking about surviving the holocaust while being raised by wolves as a girl in Poland.  A very compelling story.  Also, completely made up. 

  7. Felton / Moderator says:

    Did they teach her monkey-style kung fu?

  8. mtdna says:

    More evidence that it’s phony. Capuchins are totally incapable of raising a human child. The story would be much more plausible if they were marmosets.

  9. Jesus says:

    I’m calling bullshit.

    • Funk Daddy says:

      I tried, the line is always busy and no one set up the voicemail.

      • IndexMe says:

        That was hysterical. I was blowing my nose as my eyes wandered down to your post and I almost got an embolism in my throat, nose, ears and the back of my head simultaneously. Did I mention I have a cold?

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      I’m calling bullshit.

      I’m throwing monkey shit.

    • niktemadur says:

      I called the number, got the auto-attendant, had to endure car insurance ads and “Please stay on the line, your call is very important to us” jingles between each of 5 option menus, then when I FINALLY reached the correct option and pushed the button, the voice said “Thank you, goodbye!” and it hung up.

      You know, maybe I DID reach bullshit, after all. So in a messed up way, I may be one satisfied customer.

  10. hyph3n says:

    Totally plausible… as is the rest of her adventures…

    “In between she has led a Colombian street gang made up of homeless and orphaned children, worked in a brothel and as a slave for an abusive crime family in one of the deadliest towns in Colombia, lost three fiancées in untimely, violent deaths, faced depression and a suicide attempt and has become the head chef of a British national institution.”

    I myself was shipwrecked on a tiny island with 6 other complete strangers (the captain, his first mate, a movie star, some rich people, and a geographically indistinct farm girl) and was forced to make radios from coconuts. True story.

    • Boundegar says:

      Wait, was there a hatch in the jungle?

    • Brusyur Soksow says:

      normally a woman with a history like that has a few pieces of interesting skin art, I wonder if there are any pictures in the book… “I got this one of a falling Madonna on my left shoulder when my second fiance was pushed out of an air-lifter filled full of Columbian marching powder.  as I was concealed in the wheelbay of the aircraft I managed to land in the Bahamas as we had planned…

      • ImmutableMichael says:

        …which was nice.

        • IndexMe says:

          …except for the bit about my second fiancee. I also did not expect to get punched in the left shoulder by a mysterious girl while I was drowning my sorrows in rum sloshed drinks at shadowy, rum-dark dive. I didn’t hold it against her since I couldn’t feel the pain, and that is how I met my third fiancee…

    • sqyntz says:

       i was confused when Gilligan always wore a red shirt but never died

  11. Listener43 says:

    I’m flummoxed and nonplussed at the reactions here, quite frankly.
    The comments all seem to centre on the question of the factual nature of these assertions.
    My problem is this: if she is indeed the girl with no name, who in blazes is Marina Chapman?

    By the way, hyph3n, I think your life’s story might have the makings of a fine television programme!

  12. DevinC says:

    “Eventually, hunters found her and swapped her at a brothel for a parrot.”
    I am nominating this line to win the Internet today.  Seconded?

  13. Quiche de Resistance says:

    Planet Of The Japes?

  14. awjt says:

    True story, brah.

  15. James Mason says:

    TC Boyle has an interesting story in his collection “Tooth and Claw” about a woman working on a PhD who researches dogs by living with them, etc.  Her spouse supports the effort…for awhile.

  16. smut clyde says:

    The Sunday Times puff-piece (reprinted in our local fish-wrap) explains that “Chapman has been questioned by Andrew Lownie, her agent, and by the publisher” — so DON’T BE SO SKEPTICAL.

    The next paragraph asserts that “Experts on feral children say that monkeys are known to accept young humans into their fold”. The total number of ‘experts on feral children’ actually named in the article is approximately zero.

  17. blueelm says:

    It would be amazing that anyone is “talking” about being raised by wolves, dogs, or monkeys, and showing anything like normal social behavior, and capable of writing a book… if it were true.

    • Boris Bartlog says:

      Well, she more or less claims to have lived with them from the age of what… four to nine? So the foundations of human language would already have been laid. However, just on Bayesian grounds I would assume the story is 98% likely to be bullshit even without going to the trouble of trying to find specific red flags.

  18. $19428857 says:

    And she’s also Princess Anastasia, yeah, that’s the ticket. My wife Morgan Fairchild, who I’ve slept with, told me.

  19. Sekino says:

    Hey, I want to write my memoirs too!

    I was raised by moose until the age of 10 when they decided to send me to a prestigious boarding school.  By then, I had developed extraordinary super-human abilities such as destroying cars by sitting idle on the highway and wandering straight into swimming pools.

    Oh and there were pirates.

  20. edkedz says:

    There are too many swipes at the veracity of her claims, and nowhere near enough jokes along the lines of “life raised by monkeys has prepared her ideally for her upcoming effort to run as a Tory MP candidate.”

  21. smut clyde says:

    in the 1950s, when she was four-year-old, she was kidnapped from her Colombia home and dumped in the jungle where she spent five years in the care of capuchin monks

    Fixed for plausibility.

  22. Jon Smith says:

    5 Other cases: http://theweek.com/article/index/235216/6-children-raised-by-animals the last is very Jungle Bookish…  I had always thought these were hearsay, but there seem to be enough to make me reconsider.

  23. Origami_Isopod says:

    Has anybody ridden through the desert with her?

  24. Halloween_Jack says:

    Turns out that she was actually raised by Capuchin monks, but she couldn’t sell that book so she added a syllable. (In other news, I really am Bowie, but pretend to be an overweight, balding librarian in the American Midwest so that people will stop asking me if/when I’ll tour again.) 

  25. Brood-X says:

    Of course her publisher totally fact-checked this by tracking down the troop of monkeys and interviewing them. Not!

  26. acerplatanoides says:

    I was raised by primates

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