An Auckland resident was ordered Tuesday to stay away from Prince Charles and wife Camilla during their stay in New Zealand, thereby thwarting his plans to throw horseshit at the royal couple. Sam Bracanov, 76, was ordered by Auckland District Court to remain at least 500 meters from the future British monarch. Though he pleaded not guilty on a charge of conspiracy to commit a crime, he described to reporters a plan to "make it liquid like porridge." [Reuters]

  • LinkMan

    Sounds like a challenge!

    Surely a man capable of making horseshit liquid like porridge is also capable of coming up with a device to fling horseshit 500 meters.

    • http://twitter.com/fossilfuels Funk Daddy

      Smart and a gentleman. 

      Horseshit is well-mannered, considerate flinging.

      If he were offended by their very existence as human beings instead of just their royal status he would fling something from the asshole of a predator.

    • Prufrock451

      “Jamie, this one comes from the fans on the Mythbusters forum. Apparently, back in 2012…”

    • bzishi

      It sounds tricky. He probably needs to put it in a bag. But if people can toss a pumpkin more than a mile, I’m sure some gentleman could rig up a horseshit trebuchet for a 500 m toss. And it is for a good cause!

      Another option would be to do it by balloon.

      • Ipo

         Or using a really well trained horse. 

        • Antinous / Moderator

          I don’t think that you really want to get into a fight with one of the Royals by using a horse as a weapon.

          • Ipo

             Oh I know, hasn’t worked since the 9th century BC or so in Anatolia. 
            No, seriously, they know horses.  Didn’t Charles get married to one? 

  • http://twitter.com/fossilfuels Funk Daddy

    Given the option I would rather be struck by a soft turd than any form of liquid shit. 

  • Gilbert Wham

     If you are specifically ordered not to throw horseshit at Prince Charles, do you then have carte blanche as regards other targets?

    • http://profiles.google.com/marc.k.mielke Marc Mielke

      What about other forms of shit? Personally, I think using horseshit is weaksauce and anyone who wanted to show TRUE disdain would go the extra mile and DIY.

    • Ashley Yakeley

      He was specifically ordered to stay 500m away from them, actually.

  • Ashen Victor

    This is a refreshing change considering that we are used to having politicians throwing bullshit everyday at low men & women.

  • ocschwar

    Amazing how people like him can’t wow the New Zealand with their brilliance and persuade the citizenry to leave the British Commonwealth. 

  • http://bemused.geek.nz Robert Cruickshank

    Apparently the nong has a record of this sort of protest. Makes me wonder what else he does with his time, other than sit around chewing over his hatred for the Royal Family like so much old soup.

    • Gilbert Wham

       I dunno, I’m English, and if I think about them long enough, I kinda want to throw shit at them as well.

  • mutante

    I’m a half-British New Zealander and come from a long line of anti-monarchists. I have seen that old bloke on Queen Street and read his rambling hand-written pamphlets. He’s as crazy as a shit house rat but good on him. Well done that man.