A man has been arrested for repeatedly sneaking onto a farm in Cornwall, England, covering himself in cow-shit and masturbating. This is the third time he was caught at it.
It sounds like he really made the farm-owners' lives miserable. From a This is the West Country article:
“The family have to regularly check their livestock, outbuildings and equipment, as he has masturbated in a muck spreader and set fire to outbuildings, killing livestock in frustration when they cleaned out their farm equipment in an attempt to stop him from this lewd and obscene habit.”
I write books. My latest is a YA science fiction novel called Homeland (it's the sequel to Little Brother). More books: Rapture of the Nerds (a novel, with Charlie Stross); With a Little Help (short stories); and The Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow (novella and nonfic). I speak all over the place and I tweet and tumble, too.