Bible Firsts, by Charles L. Paddock

Now we what know what people looked like in the Bronze Age! It's obvious that he wove his outfit from his own hair, but what did she use to make hers? (Via Suddenly)

Mark Frauenfelder is the founder of Boing Boing and the editor-in-chief of MAKE and Cool Tools. Twitter: @frauenfelder. Come and hear Mark speak at the ALA conference in Chicago on July 1.

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Navin_Johnson

All this time it was Tarzan and Jane instead of “Adam & Eve”.
http://ulstercountycloakroom.blogspot.com/ Count Ulster

Didn’t know Brylcreem was available in the stone age.
- petertrepan
  
  Brylcreem, a tiny grain shalt do thee
  Brylcreem, thou shalt look so debonair
  Brylcreem, adultresses shalt pursue thee
  Behold, they run their fingers through thy hair
- Brainspore
  
  They just had to make do with triceratops phlegm.
jandrese

An lo, God said, “Give them Product”, and he saw it was good.

I guess bad hair was another side effect of getting kicked out of the garden.
William Joseph Dunn

She killed a Muppet for her frock. It could be either Grover or Cookie Monster. I can’t tell.
- Dv Revolutionary
  
  I came here to say cookie monster. It’s always nice to have crossovers in fiction.
  - Felton / Moderator
    
    I’m not very familiar with the bible. Didn’t he tempt her with a cookie fresh from the oven of knowledge, or something?
- Quiche de Resistance
  
  I think it’s from a number of Russian Blue cats. :(
Ricardo Torres de Acha

Come on! Lapiz Lazuli + Wool = Blue Wool… you don’t even need a crafting table…
- Henry Pootel
  
  Of course! :)
- petertrepan
  
  Judging from Adam and Eve’s perfect hands, they haven’t even started punching trees yet.
GlenBlank

Looks more like the Bronzer Age to me.
http://www.facebook.com/people/Nell-Anvoid/100002383626402 Nell Anvoid

Well, there’s a sure sign that our ancestors were tossed from the garden: look at those teeth. Pretty sure Dentists hadn’t yet emerged from the primordial slime. Especially ironic if the garden was actually in England…

(Easy there, Brits! You get a cornucopia of opportunities for cheap shots at us Yanks. Allow us once in a while.)
- http://johnkgoodman.com/ John K Goodman
  
  where did they get suntan lotion?
http://twitter.com/digitalArtform Joseph Francis

Is this the Andrew Loomis bible? :D
http://boingboing.net/2012/11/26/exclusive-excerpt-from-creativ.html
Sagodjur

Heck, it’s even biblically inaccurate. If that’s supposed to be Adam and Eve in the garden, they wouldn’t have had a kid yet. They didn’t have Cain, Abel, Seth, and the rest of the unnamed progeny until after the fall.
- Boundegar
  
  That’s the “serpent.” God hasn’t taken away his limbs yet.
  
  Is this Jehova’s Witness lit? It definitely has that look.
  - http://daruiburns.tumblr.com/ Dlo Burns
    
    It’s funny how Jehova Witness and Hare Krishna stuff have just a certain look to them.
- http://www.youtube.com/user/Freethinkersanon Christopher
  
  Ironically people who claim the Bible is a reliable historical source usually have no problems changing it to fit whatever their needs are at the time.
- Brainspore
  
  This has to be post-Eden since they’re wearing clothing. Maybe they just got banished to the other side of the river.
- Martijn
  
  Since they seem to be wearing animal skins, they’re clearly not in the Garden anymore.
Øyvind

The only place I’ve seen that shade of blue in the wild, has been in old women’s hair. So I’m guessing there’s a bald bronze age grandma just out of shot.
Ramone

Of course Eve was blonde! And they look exceedingly gleeful for people who’ve just doomed all of humanity to a lifetime of Original Sin. Christ, what assholes!
Nash Rambler

So I guess the Garden of Eden was located in a west Malibu gated community or something. That baby frightens me most of all.
http://twitter.com/fossilfuels Funk Daddy

Lush vegetation hides the dinosaurs. Lame.
franko

they did a good job downplaying adam’s nipple shot, too. (and btw, does the bible explain why adam had nips in the first place?)
Lupus_Yonderboy

So I read the title really quickly and I thought that it was “Bible Fists”. Man, I really want that to be a thing.
Lee Brown

Weird thing is I have this book at home from when I was a kid, plus several others from the same publisher.
http://profiles.google.com/macrumpton Michael Crumpton

Whoa, who new that haircare was such a priority back then.
CHilke

Adam and Eve need Lebensraum
pjcamp

Aryan Adam and Eve on Yahweh’s golf course.
sean

LOVE that well-groomed look! “Brylcreem, a little dab’ll do ya, Brylcreem, you’ll look so debonair! Brylcreem, the girls’ll all go to ya, you’ll love the natural look it gives your hair…”
feetleet

I don’t know how to break this to you, Adam, but Eve seems to have been ribbed for someone else’s pleasure. Snake, you devil!
Aeron

Bibles first, historical accuracy second.
Cassie Smith

It’s Tom Cruise!
apoxia

I had this series of books as a child. Weird, I didn’t remember that until I saw this scan. It brought back some old memories!
http://twitter.com/wingland Will England

Heh. I went out of my way to buy the whole series just for the illustrations. Cost me a pretty penny, but they are just something to behold. Not good, but certainly something.