What to do on Mt. Everest when you're dead


48 Responses to “What to do on Mt. Everest when you're dead”

  1. Soooo.. unicorn chaser now please.

  2. franko says:

    i for one find this horrifying.
    (but also admittedly a bit fascinating.)

  3. Die valiantly but dress lavishly for the benefit of the living

  4. ChicagoD says:

    I have absolutely no concept of what the terrain is like, but I have always thought “nobody could take a saucer up with them and let a body slide back down?” Hell, Abe Simpson rode one of these guys all the way down a mountain.

    Also, I don’t feel the need for a unicorn chaser mostly because the risks are so well known and the effort required to be there so great that I assume that anyone who died on the mountain contemplated that death and was fine with it.

    • CH says:

      “nobody could take a saucer up with them”
      Probably not without risking their own lives,

    • Sam Ley says:

      The mountain isn’t just one giant cone you could just slide down – it is covered in splines and ridges and cliffs, a sled ride from the top would be fun for about 20 seconds before you got launched into some inaccessible area, off a rocky cliff, down into a hidden crevasse, etc.

      Though there is a technique used in parts of mountain descents that are suited for it called the Glissade, where you basically sit on your butt and slide down the mountain. You use an ice-axe in the self-arrest position (held across your chest diagonally, point out) to stop yourself when the rocks are getting too close for comfort.

  5. Sanjaya Kumar says:

    The cold that killed him then keeps his body from deteriorating.

  6. dioptase says:

    That tears it.  I’m changing my will.  I now want to be be propped up in a prominent location on Mt. Everest.  Mirrored sunglasses, margarita glass in hand, wearing a Hawaiian t-shirt, and sporting a shit eating grin.

  7. blueelm says:

    “Francys Arsentiev was the first American woman to reach Everest’s summit without the aid of bottled oxygen, in 1998. But climbers do not recognize this as a successful ascent since she never made it down the mountain. Following a rough night time trek to camp, her husband, a fellow climber, noticed she was missing. Despite the dangers, he chose to turn back to find his wife anyway. On his way back, he encountered a team of Uzbek climbers, who said they had tried to help Francys but had to abandon her when their own oxygen became depleted. The next day, two other climbers found Francys, who was still alive but in too poor of a condition to be moved. Her husband’s ice axe and rope were nearby, but he was nowhere to be found. Francys died where the two climbers left her, and climbers solved her husband’s disappearance the following year when they found his body lower down on the mountain face where he fell to his death.”

    This one sounds like the makings of a movie. Or is there one already made.

  8. Well, if I’m ever stuck on Everest and about to die, I’m gonna make sure to stretch out my arm and point in the wrong direction. F ‘em.

  9. feetleet says:

    Everest mountain ever.  

  10. sqyntz says:

    imagine the ethical dilemma(s) of taking needed equipment from one of the “landmarks”

  11. Art says:

    Chicago D’s got a very funny comment there !  :)

  12. peregrinus says:

    There is such an awesome zombie flick in all this.

    Sorry to be crass.

    • starfish and coffee says:

      Brilliant! You’re on course to win today’s internets sir!
      The twist would have to be that the zombies retain some of their alpha-male, “me first” attitude.
      Don’t like the idea of them attacking Nepalese villagers though. Perhaps the zombies should be attacking some of those “climb Everest for charity” muppets.

      • peregrinus says:

          maple syrup and jam!  love it

        The alphas would assault first by throwing away your oxygen bottles with grisly cries of thems’r fr wimps!”  Then chase you up the mountain.  They’d keep some intelligence, like the lovely nazombies in Dead Snow (DodSchno … DodSchneuoh?) which I loved, and perhaps in the final scene where our gorgeous heroine and hero are spindizzy and coughing, would attack eachother to be the first to the peak.

        Then that heli would arrive and safely carry them away (it’s a movie, ok?!)

  13. Daneel says:

    Chill out, kick some ice or give everyone the cold shoulder?

  14. niktemadur says:

    The Nepal side of Everest is where hordes of the bored rich, dahrling, go to die expensively.
    But K2, aka Godwin-Austen, sends shivers up and down my spine.  It’s like the Chinese side of Everest, from every angle.  It’s where superior athletes go to die.

  15. planettom says:

    I’m still hoping they find Irvine’s body (died 1924 with George Mallory), since there’s some speculation that the film in their cameras might be recoverable. Possibly providing evidence they were first to summit.

  16. peacock says:

    A hiker friend claims most of the deaths occur on the way down the mountain.  It is rare to die on the ascent.

    Can anyone confirm this is true.

    • peregrinus says:

       Certainly the falling deaths.

    • That’s what my physiology professor said while lecturing about high altitude physiology years ago.

      However I think it is a somewhat “duh” statistic on further consideration.  People will tend to stop going up if they are in trouble and start going down.  People who are in trouble are more likely to die.

      I personally have always found it easier to fall, and particularly to fall seriously when going down.  So that could be a factor.

  17. I believe it was mentioned in “into thin air” that one could see some dead climbers from a previous season from one point on the trail.  Could be from something else, however.

    • social_maladroit says:

      IIRC, you’re right (that was a good, and very sad, book). IIRC it also mentioned discarded junk (like oxygen canisters) piling up.

  18. timquinn says:

    So far as I am aware, no one has ever died from learning to play the piano.

  19. Greg Webster says:

    This appears to be an engineering problem. How about packing a body into an inflated ball and letting it roll to a safer place down the hill? Make the ball out of individually-inflated slices to cut down on the inevitable pops. 

    Of course, only bring down those whose families wish them brought down (and they can pay the costs incurred).

  20. eldritch says:

    Nuke it from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

  21. timquinn says:

    I have said this before, but those guys should be stacked like cord wood at the summit. This way make a real and lasting contribution to the field by making the climb that much more epic. OK, you’re here now climb to the top of the stack of bodies to really get high. I mean, how dedicated are these clowns?

  22. ImmortalYawn says:

    People seem to be able to take out a camera and stand around for a few minutes to take video and photos of the bodies…strange they cant take the bodies back down? Also a lot of bodies are between camps…I think the whole deal here is people CAN take the bodies down, but they have paid a LOT of money to do otherwise (not waste their time)

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