Making sure Pizza Hut is "accurately and effectively represented online"

Hello Mr. Pescovitz,

My name is Alli Berry and I am working with Pizza Hut, making sure that they are accurately and effectively represented online.

I noticed that your article “Pizza Hut Perfume” at discusses the exclusive Pizza Hut perfume but does not contain a link to the Pizza Hut website. Therefore, I wanted to reach out to you in hopes that you will consider linking to it for the convenience of your readers.

The Pizza Hut home page can be found here:

I hope this is helpful and you will consider updating your page accordingly. If you have any questions or need any further information, please feel free to contact me at the information below.

Thank you,

Alli Berry
On behalf of Pizza Hut

Site Summary:
Pizza Hut delivers more pizza, pasta and wings than any other restaurant. As the world’s largest pizza franchise and a subsidiary of Yum! Brands Inc., Pizza Hut operates nearly 10,000 restaurants in more than 90 countries.
The information in this email and any attachments may contain proprietary and confidential information that is intended for the addressee(s) only. If you are not the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that any disclosure, copying, distribution, retention or use of the contents of this information is prohibited. When addressed to our clients or vendors, any information contained in this e-mail or any attachments is subject to the terms and conditions in any governing contract. If you have received this e-mail in error, please immediately contact the sender and delete the e-mail.



    1.  I must be doing it wrong, all I’m getting is pictures of “Pizza the Hutt”. The postmortem photos after he ate himself to death are gross!

  1. Oh no! You duplicated the email when her footer says it is prohibited! The Internet Police are going to backtrace you.

    I always wonder under what authority they presume to be prohibiting the behavior of other people via unsolicited email. 

    1.  Nope – it’s only prohibited if you’re not the intended recipient. It’s alright for David Pescovitz to duplicate it, but don’t *you* go and duplicate that email.

      1. If I duplicate it for whatever reason, under what actual authority do they have to prevent me from doing so? Is there a law that says I cannot reproduce that email or is it as toothless as many cease and desist orders?

        1. I believe copyright technically might apply, solely to the case of copying the text of the e-mail directly, but nothing prohibits discussing what was in it. 

          But of course, we all know how everybody completely respects and obeys copyright at all times so obviously nobody’s going to do it. 

          1. Not-so-hypothetically speaking, the respect of an entity’s copyright is directly proportional to the size of said entity’s stable of lawyers and willingness to use them.

            Not-so-hypothetically because a friend of mine was actually threatened with copyright infringement charges if he dared publicize a nasty email someone sent him.

          2. We don’t know that the footer wasn’t actually added by Mr. Pescovitz, therefore making us the intended recipients. Prove me wrong.

      2.  But. . .  but. .  . I did duplicate it. . .  in my browser’s cache.

        Am I a criminal now?  My first crime. . .  and it’s totally lame.  FML.

      3. But aren’t I now the intended recipient, since David put it on his blog (on which I am registered member).

    2. Have you seen Cory’s e-mail EULA?  I had to get a bigger computer just to hold his e-mails.

  2. Gee, i had no idea how to find pizza hut. Can someone post a step-by-step FAQ on how to access their site please? ]: im so lost. Do i use Google? Do i send in something via snail mail? Pony Express?

    1. An easy way is to summon Dough’nz-cruzt, daemon prince of pizza, from the Planes of Torment and Heartburn. Simply burn the grease of six virgin sausages upon finest corrugated cardboard whilst chanting the Litany of Sauce. If successful, a rusting 1996 Cavalier will appear from a towering pillar of ash and smoke. His physical messenger will aid you from there, but be sure not to look on his visage lest your mortal soul drain from your body like so much melted cheese.

    2. If you are the older women I work with, you will type “google” into the browser window’s integrated search box, clink on the link to Google in the search results, and then type in “pizza hut website”. It physically hurts me to watch this.

    1. It’s mildly funny as a spoof, but it’s atrocious as a tutorial. Not because it overexplains a simple concept, but because it does so very poorly. 

      It’s mildly condescending, assumes no background knowledge one moment and skips steps the next, and mentions advanced concepts but doesn’t bother to provide even a link to a more detailed explanation of these.

      Tutorial humour: The last thing you’d expect to evoke the ire of technical writers.

    2. That is so funny! 
      Your link was useful to me.  I have always missed the line tool in Gimp because I cannot be bothered to read any tutorials. 
      Thank you.

    1. Say, aren’t Pizza Hut pizzas topped with a frothy mixture of lube and fecal matter that is sometimes the byproduct of anal sex?

      I can play SEO, too.

      1. Too bad “” is no longer what it used to be.

        Curiously enough, Wikipedia reports that, when the “” domain was available again after being shut down, the company trying to sell it was named “SEOBidding”.

  3. Of course, it has nothing to do with people being able to find, and everything to do with getting link juice from an extremely popular website  (link juice being highly preferable to whatever it is that runs off the top of a Pizza Hut pizza).

    1. Yes, and that is why I made the link “nofollow.” (Although I understand that it’s questionable how well that works these days.)

  4. Yeah, I might be in the market for an empty former Pizza Hut building; there’s one just a few miles away. Wonder if they have a trademark on the roof design and color. 

    1.  If they left the building that way, they can’t ask you to change the building.

      They might have a problem with you incorporating that distinctive roof shape and color into your marketing, though.

      1. I delivered pizza for Pizza Hut for several years between 1988 and 1994, and the company always referred to the sit-down restaurants as Red-Roofs, as opposed to the Delivery/Carryout-only locations (which were often repurposed Winchell’s Donut shops in Southern California; one could always tell by the rounded-triangle sign out front).

        I worked at a Carryout location, but down the block was a Red-Roof.  it got sold several years back, and is now an independent Italian restaurant.  They kept the distinctive roof shape, but painted it light brown, presumably so people wouldn’t mistake it for the Pizza Hut that occupied the building for several decades previously.

        So I wouldn’t worry about rebuilding the roof, but repainting it might be in order.

  5. Ladies and gentlemen, I invite you to observe the “SEO Expert” in its natural habitat.  The activity seen here is referred to as “Link Building”.  This ritual is performed hundreds of times — as a sort of rain dance — in the hopes that the Great Search God will bring Search Traffic to The Site.

  6. Despite having never visited the Pizza Hut website before, I find that I can type in “pizzahu” at which point Chrome helpfully fills in the T and the dot com for me.

    Telling us that the website address must be typed in as “” seems a little behind the times.  Perhaps Alli Berry should make updates to ensure that Pizza Hut is “accurately and effectively represented online” in the company’s literature.

  7. “…Pizza Hut, making sure that they are accurately and effectively represented online.”

    Fine, post a picture of a pizza and of a hut.  Done.

  8. Too bad their effort goes into marketing rather than production.  Pizza Hut gave up on making a quality product when they decided that their competition was Dominos and Pappa Johns in the early 1990s, and joined the race to see how cheap people were willing to go.  For you young whippersnappers, Pizza Hut was once marketed as the high-end pizza chain, and put out a quality pizza.

    1. Well, it certainly had delusions of being that and priced its products accordingly, yes. But I honestly can’t say the Pizza Hut products I had twenty years ago were that much better than the Pizza Hut products I had two months ago.

      1.  I remember that their pan pizza used to have a much better crunchy buttery crust and that their cheese was more flavorful, but maybe this is the glow of nostalgia and their serving me beer when I was underage.

    2. Hey, if nothing else, Pizza Hut’s efforts to reclaim the delivery market from Domino’s in the late 80s helped to greatly improve the quality of Domino’s product.  Used to be Domino’s pizza was downright terrible, but they were the only big chain that delivered, so you were stuck with them if you didn’t want to get up off your fat ass and pick up a pizza yourself.  Once Pizza Hut started delivery, their market share rose dramatically.  And it was only a couple of years ago when Domino’s literally acknowledged in their own advertising that they used to make pretty bad pizza, but now they were moved to improve it.

      And I have to agree with invictus.  I ate a hell of a lot of Pizza Hut pizza twenty-five years ago.  It pretty much tastes the same to me today.

      1. I know someone who hated the ‘Domino’s Is Now Better’ ads because she felt they were demeaning her for liking the old pizza. I’d make fun of someone for letting ads have power over them, but then I remembered that there’s still some PSAs that terrify me.

  9. Honestly, I’m glad to see Pizza Hut’s funds are directed towards awkward marketing efforts rather than lame legal threats.

    1. I have a combination KFC/Taco Bell a block from my house.  That’s almost as good.

      Weirdly, it’s the only drive-thru in my neighborhood with obviously bulletproof glass.

    1. Played this for the first time for my kids the other day, they laughed their tiny butts off. Pizza the Hutt was an especial favourite, even though we never eat there. Apparently, there’s some song in Australian scouting involving fast food restaurants  specifically pizza hut, that is fun to sing and totally not free advertising.

  10. Beats a Cease and Desist, which means they’re more internet-savvy than most of the remainder of legal corporate America.

  11. Ah, to be a PR monkey again. The thankless hours! The soul pulverizing! The prone positions whilst watching any last vestiage of self respect immoliated before my eyes by executive stooges!

  12. There is humor here, but at least it’s the food service industry we’re dealing with.

    If the MPAA were managing this issue, this would have been a takedown request, including three pre-canned lawsuits.

    For bonus fun it would have required that boing boing also remove the content from the pizza hut site, and deactivate the entire L’Oreal site for good measure.

  13. C’mon, folks! The Pizza Hut SEO person wrote a nice, threat free letter which politely asked for a little bit of BoingBoing link juice. Compared to some of the other corporate correspondence that BoingBoing has reprinted, this is definitely one of the least offensive.

    Of course, it’s not actually from Pizza Hut, and there’s no Thank You for mentioning them on the illustrious BoingBoing, and the link offered isn’t to the Pizza Hut Canada, who actually made/sponsored the perfume, but at least it’s better than some posturing wanna-be-takedown-notice.

  14. As it’s Pizza Hut Canada that’s shilling the perfume shouldn’t that be 

    And when do we Americans get crappy pizza with HOT DOG STUFFED CRUST?

  15. Here’s a lesson in SEO kids: Links in comments are worth crap-all in relative linkjuice compared to a link in the body copy of a post.

  16. I got this (nearly) exact same form email from someone representing Kohl’s when I wrote a blog post and didn’t link to them for a pair of $9 tights. I’ve been web-publishing since ’99, and SEO is creeeeepy.

  17. Gotta agree with those who see the email as a polite request, and nothing more.  The whole interaction now reads as Pescovitz being peeved and frustrated that his original snarky post (about an admittedly very odd product) was met with nothing but additional sincere effort to promote Pizza Hut products.  

      1. Ugh…can’t eat Pizza Hut pizza…nor Papa John’s (especially after Schnatter’s douchey ACA response) so Domino’s is much less offensive to MY little taste buddies…

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