By Cory Doctorow at 10:47 am Sat, Dec 15, 2012
Damnit Produce, quit telling me what to do
DO NOT STEAL PRODUCE, OR BECOME COMPOST.
Needs two periods.
One semicolon and one period would do.
I considered that option.
as a gardener and recovering truck farmer i think the sign looks correct as it is.
I used to interpret “Pick Your Own Strawberries” signs as a demand to leave the owner’s alone.
Dude, that was hilarious. I gave you an up-vote but I had to also comment.
You’ve been in Farmer Maggots crops!
might go for the semicolon there myself; they just taste better.
Needs a closing shriek mark too.
Or we could go with artistically dramatic punctuation. DO. NOT. STEAL. PRODUCE. Reads like a film trailer now.
Not enough words for faux-iambic pentameter
Wasn’t that one of the posters in “They Live?”
I wanted to write something flippant but I just agree. “Do not steal” suffices and “produce” is sound advice.
Amateur artists borrow; great artists banana.
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like, look at this banana, seriously.
Eats shoots and runs?
Isn’t that meant to be “Eats, shoots and leaves”? You’re about as useful as screen doors on a battleship!
Damn it. stepped on my own punch line.
Ahem. Isn’t it screen door on a submarine?
Careful, they’re trying to build a chain of mis-remembered qoutes, all leading to one another. They’re walking softly and carrying a big zuchini, if you know what I mean ;-)
Punctuation is important. Sometimes a comma is all that stands between an invitation at a happy family gathering and that same family resorting to cannibalism.
(“Let’s eat, Grandma!” vs “Let’s eat Grandma!”)
Or the importance of the apostrophe in preventing polygamy:
“Those old things in the corner are my husbands.”
So it capitalization. There’s a difference between “I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse” and “I had to help my uncle jack off a horse”
“That’s ‘make like a tree and leave’ you idiot, you sound like a damn fool when you say it that way”, …aaand I’ve said to much.
A definite article might do as well, Do not steal the produce.
Perhaps this is a left over sign from some Occupy march.
My guess is that it’s OK to steal everything except the produce.
I believe any sort of sign like that works better if it starts with the word please.
I was thinking grocer’s quotes:
DO NOT STEAL “PRODUCE”
Don’t even get me started of random use of quotation marks, just don’t.
A common and baffling exanple is the use of quotes around “Ice” at gas stations. Is it some sort of hipster ironic thing? Is it fake “Ice?”
Answering the question in my head with a typo:
Do not. Steel Produce.
The link below was right below this article in my feed. Very similar
Great minds RSS alike!
I prefer the sign, “Some of my plants are covered in deadly poisons. Only I know which ones.”
Fun with homonyms! Bitch! Pussy! Cock! Fag! Chink!
I don’t get it.
It’s a common koan and is correctly understood as: “Do not. Steal. Produce.”
tut. tut. you guys don’t know of which you type, the queen would not be proud of your use of her english.
DO! NOT! STEAL! THE! PRODUCE!!!
note the judicious use of exclamation points as well as all caps, plus the addition of a definite article.
in addition, i have removed the cloaked invocation of the protective angels and installed the curse of bambino.
hail satan! he shall ruul you allllll!?.//!::? (note the satanic invocation of misspellings and poor gramur–hail, hail satan)
DO NOT, STEAL PRODUCE. Perhaps the owner does not wish us to buy produce?
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