Needs comma

I write books. My latest is a YA science fiction novel called Homeland (it's the sequel to Little Brother). More books: Rapture of the Nerds (a novel, with Charlie Stross); With a Little Help (short stories); and The Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow (novella and nonfic). I speak all over the place and I tweet and tumble, too.

MORE: Funny • language • london • pictures • signs • uk • wide

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Ants and Stars: Bruce Sterling and Jasmina Tesanovic visit the Sardinia Radio Telescope in Italy

The Snowden Principle

doomcake

Damnit Produce, quit telling me what to do
http://www.facebook.com/matthew.david.sweeney Matthew Sweeney

DO NOT STEAL PRODUCE, OR BECOME COMPOST.
http://twitter.com/digitalArtform Joseph Francis

Needs two periods.
- Antinous / Moderator
  
  One semicolon and one period would do.
  - http://twitter.com/digitalArtform Joseph Francis
    
    I considered that option.
mathman_mr_t

as a gardener and recovering truck farmer i think the sign looks correct as it is.
Daneel

I used to interpret “Pick Your Own Strawberries” signs as a demand to leave the owner’s alone.
- DisGuest
  
  Dude, that was hilarious. I gave you an up-vote but I had to also comment.
ryane

You’ve been in Farmer Maggots crops!
http://twitter.com/dailyrev Brian Donohue

might go for the semicolon there myself; they just taste better.
millie fink

Needs a closing shriek mark too.
vinegartom23

Or we could go with artistically dramatic punctuation. DO. NOT. STEAL. PRODUCE. Reads like a film trailer now.
- Boundegar
  
  Shatner FTW!
  - http://daruiburns.tumblr.com/ Dlo Burns
    
    Not enough words for faux-iambic pentameter
- Preston Sturges
  
  Wasn’t that one of the posters in “They Live?”
Mike Baker

I wanted to write something flippant but I just agree. “Do not steal” suffices and “produce” is sound advice.
http://profile.yahoo.com/5FDXZESRY5KDSLG3VWOLPDER6U Nate

Amateur artists borrow; great artists banana.
- http://www.raines.com/ raines
  
  Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like, look at this banana, seriously.
Preston Sturges

Eats shoots and runs?
- http://profiles.google.com/gigazarak Adam Lemmo
  
  Isn’t that meant to be “Eats, shoots and leaves”? You’re about as useful as screen doors on a battleship!
  - Preston Sturges
    
    Damn it. stepped on my own punch line.
  - Jake0748
    
    Ahem. Isn’t it screen door on a submarine?
    - ocker3
      
      Careful, they’re trying to build a chain of mis-remembered qoutes, all leading to one another. They’re walking softly and carrying a big zuchini, if you know what I mean ;-)
http://newnumber6.livejournal.com Peter

Punctuation is important. Sometimes a comma is all that stands between an invitation at a happy family gathering and that same family resorting to cannibalism.

(“Let’s eat, Grandma!” vs “Let’s eat Grandma!”)
- Preston Sturges
  
  Or the importance of the apostrophe in preventing polygamy:
  
  “Those old things in the corner are my husbands.”
- http://twitter.com/DaleGlass Dale Glass
  
  So it capitalization. There’s a difference between “I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse” and “I had to help my uncle jack off a horse”
http://profiles.google.com/gigazarak Adam Lemmo

“That’s ‘make like a tree and leave’ you idiot, you sound like a damn fool when you say it that way”, …aaand I’ve said to much.
tudza

A definite article might do as well, Do not steal the produce.

Perhaps this is a left over sign from some Occupy march.
Paul Renault

My guess is that it’s OK to steal everything except the produce.
TacoChuck

Needs please.

I believe any sort of sign like that works better if it starts with the word please.
jimh

I was thinking grocer’s quotes:
DO NOT STEAL “PRODUCE”
- Preston Sturges
  
  Don’t even get me started of random use of quotation marks, just don’t.
  
  A common and baffling exanple is the use of quotes around “Ice” at gas stations. Is it some sort of hipster ironic thing? Is it fake “Ice?”
http://twitter.com/KillAdequate Do Something.

Answering the question in my head with a typo:
Do not. Steel Produce.
http://wowgrump.blogspot.com/ Ed

The link below was right below this article in my feed. Very similar
http://www.futilitycloset.com/2012/12/15/green-party/
- http://twitter.com/therilesyouknow riley
  
  Great minds RSS alike!
oasisob1

I prefer the sign, “Some of my plants are covered in deadly poisons. Only I know which ones.”
Preston Sturges

Fun with homonyms! Bitch! Pussy! Cock! Fag! Chink!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLXkPOThr0Q
steve849

I don’t get it.
miasm

It’s a common koan and is correctly understood as: “Do not. Steal. Produce.”
lewis_stoole

tut. tut. you guys don’t know of which you type, the queen would not be proud of your use of her english.
DO! NOT! STEAL! THE! PRODUCE!!!
note the judicious use of exclamation points as well as all caps, plus the addition of a definite article.
in addition, i have removed the cloaked invocation of the protective angels and installed the curse of bambino.
hail satan! he shall ruul you allllll!?.//!::? (note the satanic invocation of misspellings and poor gramur–hail, hail satan)
rocketpjs

DO NOT, STEAL PRODUCE. Perhaps the owner does not wish us to buy produce?