As is usually the case in times of unthinkable horror, The Onion just fucking nails it:
Despairing sources confirmed that the gunman, armed with a semiautomatic assault rifle—a fucking combat rifle, Jesus—walked into a classroom full of goddamned children where his mother was a teacher and, good God, if this is what the world is becoming, then how about we just pack it in and fucking give up, because this is no way to live.
I mean, honestly, all 315 million Americans confirmed.
“Well, I suppose we have to try to pick up the pieces and make some sort of sense of this tragedy and—you know what? Fuck it, I can’t do this,” said Connecticut resident Michael Zaleski, his remarks understandable given the circumstances, because, holy shit, what else can one say? “I’m sorry, but I can’t fucking do this. Can you? Can anyone?”
Fuck Everything, Nation Reports
'Just Illegalize Us Already,' Nation's Assault Weapons Beg
Report: It Okay To Spend Rest Of Day Curled In Fetal Position Under Desk
Right To Own Handheld Device That Shoots Deadly Metal Pellets At High Speed Worth All Of This
A 12-year-old boy demanded a Chicken McNugget from a girl who had just bought some, then held a gun to her head and asked again. She pushed the gun away and boarded the train, and he was later taken into custody, police say. The New York Police Department says the gun has not been found, […]
A jury in South Carolina today convicted Dylann S. Roof in the racially motivated killings of 9 black people in a church in Charleston. He faces the possibility of a death sentence.
You can find more information on the Sandy Hook Promise website.
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The 2016 World Series game 7 will undoubtedly go down in history as one of the greatest baseball games of all time. With endless suspense, a nefariously-timed rain delay, and extra innings, it reminded over 40 million viewers why they love America’s pastime – and why all bets were truly off in 2016. Savor the […]