/ Rob Beschizza / 9 am Wed, Dec 19 2012
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  • Denny's "The Hobbit" Menu Video Review


    Denny's "The Hobbit" Menu Video Review

    What could be more enchanting to a J.R.R. Tolkien fan than hearty meals which evoke the rustic grandeur of The Shire?

    Video: Rob and Heather Beschizza • Music: "Darkest Child", by Kevin MacLeod.

    When we saw that Denny's offered a Hobbit-themed Menu to coincide with the release of the major motion picture, we knew we had to check it out. What could be more enchanting to a J.R.R. Tolkien fan than hearty meals which evoke the rustic grandeur of The Shire?

    ★ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆

    / / COMMENTS

    / / /


        1. I can’t believe that you missed the chance to say, “It was cold and dead, and a foul sump of oily many-coloured ooze lay at its bottom.”

    1. A few months back there was another post on BB about the Denny’s Hobbit menu, but it got pulled almost immediately. Just curious — what happened there?

    2. It’s my contention that an actual bird with a chisel can produce better images than the cameras on these tablet phones. Modern Stone Age Imagery!

    3. I am very disappointed the meals did not match up to the photos on the menu. Why those plates didn’t look magical at all! 

    4.  Crumbya, the Ring of Breading, Burnya, the Ring of Still-Hot Fryer Oil, and Crya, the Ring of syn-propanethial S-oxide.

    5. Back in the 90s, the late lamented Bikini magazine used to run a regular feature where the self-loathing food reviewer would subject himself to fast-food gluttony feasts.

      My favorite is the one where he compared the Taco Bell 7-layer burrito to Dante’s 7 layers of Hell; as each layer progresses through your digestive tract, you are subjected to feelings akin to those of the suffering souls that line the concentric walls of The Pit.

    6. I feel like it would be a little patronising to say how smooshably adorable I find Rob and Heather in this video.  I guess it could be slightly cuter if they were wearing Ewok onesies, but only slightly.

    7. We went on 11/6 in New York, the day the menu premiered.  Which may have been part of the mistake.  My partner ordered the skillet, being a gluten free guy and the skillet had sausage, potatoes, etc.  I forget what fancy name they gave it, but he rather liked it.  I ordered the mango smoothie, which I couldn’t finish so my partner finished it.

      I got the Hobbit Hole, which would have been rather good had the eggs been cooked properly.  I like over easy, where the whites are cooked and the yellows oozing, but the whites were under-done.  I left half my meal on the plate, probably a wise decision.

      They never offered me the trading cards. As I didn’t need them, and the waitress was a complete ditz, I didn’t bother asking.  They were not what drew me, although they may have amused me.

      So we had a 50% satisfaction rate.  We avoided the fried donut holes obviously made with artificial color, etc.  If we’d both gotten the skillet, we may have both ended up happy.

    8. I’m two months late, but a couple of points:

      Did anyone besides me read the Hobbit video graphic as “Denny’s Manure View”?

      Also, between this and the “Cheesecake Factory” piece a month or so later, I’m starting to wonder if there’s not, well, an ax being ground here.  If so, no prob, I just like to know what’s what.

      Another side-point: I don’t fault restaurants for giving people what they want.  I fault people (me, for example) for wanting it.  If many of us, as Americans, are so fouled-up in body and mind and soul that we need single-sitting 3000+ calorie plates of comfort food to get us through our day, there’s something very wrong with our day, our culture, and our way of life.  Same with my take on guns: there’s something fundamentally wrong with us, if we’re so quick to fill someone/s fulla lead for so little as looking at us funny.  There’s an…insecurity and paranoia and basic unkindness/self-centeredness at play with most of us that really worries me.  American, individually or in groups, scare me a lot more than do plates of food or guns.  In my opinion, the idea of limiting access to guns (or high-calorie foods) doesn’t address the real issue: there’s something wrong with us that needs to be fixed.

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