Comments on: Disney Princess Armored Backpack, with carbon nanotubes

By: Steve Nordquist

Steve Nordquist — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 18:55:00 +0000

“Yes.” Satin and washable tuille, please. Do tell how the kinetic energy is going to not destroy the childlike function of the fleshbag ostensibly booking it for home? (Magneto backstory? Toni Morrison anthology on the outer pack?) An educator intern could ostensibly build a Juggernaut Of +2 Princess Bags over desks and nap mats in Red Bull Time and wear that…policy permitting…while “enhanced interrogation” of the new resource officer checks out.

By: Gilbert Wham

Gilbert Wham — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 17:24:00 +0000

You can get a LOT of books for 300 [currency unit] if you shop around. Gonna be a big bag (and probably bullet-proof, aye).

By: Mister44

Mister44 — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 04:20:00 +0000

I’ve owned desks from the 50s. They are built like tanks. I give them a fair shot of surviving an a-bomb ;o)

By: Mister44

Mister44 — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 04:18:00 +0000

Soft body armor doesn’t stop rifle rounds. You need a hard plate that slips into the armor for that.

By: artbyjcm

artbyjcm — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 01:06:00 +0000

Crossing my fingers for Nintendo licensing this, and making a Hyrule Shield backpack, at which point I will buy one for myself.

By: Ipo

Ipo — Thu, 20 Dec 2012 00:18:00 +0000

”Bulletproof” does not have to be heavy. At all.

By: MollyMaguire

MollyMaguire — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 23:24:00 +0000

I am going to design and market a personal mobile grounding rod, because getting shot in a mass shooting is apparently about as likely as getting hit by lightning.

By: Cowicide

Cowicide — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 23:02:00 +0000

Will this product come with a training DVD for the kids to watch?

Maybe they can use this quick guide I made in the meantime:

http://i.imgur.com/yx8De.jpg

By: Antinous / Moderator

Antinous / Moderator — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 22:59:00 +0000

If I had a child, I’d dress it in chainmail-kevlar. Which is one of the reasons that I won’t have any children. That and the fact that I’d name it Princess Cuddlemuffin. I know my psychological limits.

By: Brainspore

Brainspore — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 22:23:00 +0000

I suppose they’re at least as effective as those Hyrdrogen-Bomb-Proof desks schools used for duck-and-cover drills back in the ’50s.

By: Aaron Nolen

Aaron Nolen — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 22:22:00 +0000

Not necessary for me to test – I’m not a doofus that has no understanding of the capabilities and limitations of firearms.

By: johnyaya

johnyaya — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 22:06:00 +0000

If you got a regular backpack and filled it with $300 worth of books would it stop a bullet?

How about $300 worth of Little Mermaid DVD’s?

By: Atvaark

Atvaark — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 22:05:00 +0000

How could anything go wrong?

By: Michael Smith

Michael Smith — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 20:54:00 +0000

This is very Snow Crash.

By: Mandy J Watson

Mandy J Watson — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 19:24:00 +0000

I read that as “Unisex Unicorn Tactical Vest”. Even though it makes no sense I guess I really want one!

By: James Agenbroad

James Agenbroad — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 19:07:00 +0000

Carbon nanotubes…as opposed to ballistic nylon like a normal backpack.

By: Jay Yeman

Jay Yeman — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 19:00:00 +0000

OK Suzie and Johnny. When the big bad man comes into your classroom with a gun, run to your cubbie, grab your magic backpack, and put it in front of you. Make sure you don’t get shot. Have a great day at school!

By: Brainspore

Brainspore — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 18:26:00 +0000

I thought that was what all the metal detectors were for.

By: Dee Dee

Dee Dee — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 18:21:00 +0000

Oh, and you expect the kid to wear a bullet-proof whatever o a daily basis and not be affected at all by the stress of the perspective of being shot at. Let the kids spend their entire childhoods terrified, you know, that is surely the better way to stop violence.

By: BijouxBoy

BijouxBoy — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 18:02:00 +0000

What a bizarre country.

By: Brainspore

Brainspore — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:55:00 +0000

*wince*

By: Dean Putney

Dean Putney — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:47:00 +0000

Now available at Target!

By: Brainspore

Brainspore — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:47:00 +0000

As long as psychos only aim for the center of the backpack then the kids should be fine.

By: Navin_Johnson

Navin_Johnson — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:44:00 +0000

She’s horrible. In case anybody is curious as to what kind of background drives such idiocy:

http://shameproject.com/profile/megan-mcardle/

By: Brainspore

Brainspore — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:35:00 +0000

A few years ago my wife taught at an elementary school that responded to the threat of school shootings by forcing all children to buy transparent backpacks, the theory being that they wouldn’t be able to smuggle guns into school that way. So this bullshit backpack-based security measure has already been cancelled out by other bullshit backpack-based security measures.

By: nvlady

nvlady — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:21:00 +0000

The Avengers!? That is soooo last summer! What’s the new $300+ backpack the kids will want now? In order to protect, you gotta get ahead of the trends.

By: Jeremy Sebens

Jeremy Sebens — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 17:06:00 +0000

I’m confused.

If my understanding is correct, carbon nanotube materials are very, very strong in tension, but not so much in shear (just like carbon fiber). More importantly, toughness is not particularly impressive.

Seems like a silly material for energy absorption…

By: Steve Miller

Steve Miller — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 16:58:00 +0000

Nearly took off his thumb with that knife, didn’t he?

By: bcsizemo

bcsizemo — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 16:40:00 +0000

Not much is going to stop a bullet when you are going for maximum penetration.’
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Ew_jfj9798

By: allotrope

allotrope — Wed, 19 Dec 2012 16:34:00 +0000

Here’s a demonstration with a 9mm bullet fired a couple of feet away.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XQgUrjCZmZw

Here’s some stuff on the backpack itself.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iQDfZNM4vhA

I have no idea if they have a whole bulletproof blanket inside the Disney backpack, kinda doubt it if they sell for just 300 bucks. But if they can actually manufacture this stuff so incredibly cheaply then it won’t be long before the world’s armies are marching in bulletproof uniforms.