A most interestingly named corporation (NSFW language)

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19 Responses to “A most interestingly named corporation (NSFW language)”

  1. vonbobo says:

    I use these guys for all of my corporate control solutions, and enhancing upward mobility of my performance demographics. 

  2. I may work with these people. Just this morning, I received a document “just for final edits” which contained the following:

    “When a manager establishes that an organization is navigating the use of a particular tool or approach to project deliverables, but does not have awareness of a similar organization using the approach in the field or access to information on this particular topic, a manager can share the topic area with other managers to generate recommended approaches or identify peer organizations.”

    Obviously, I’ve derailed my entire day to rewrite all 32 pages.

    • blueelm says:

      Ugh… why? Seriously, why do people start writing that way when the subject pertains to work? There has to be some kind of linguistic or sociological rule here. There’s clearly an expected register, but somehow attempting it primarily results English that seems like it was run back and forth between Japanese and “Scientologist” in Google translate.

      • Boundegar says:

        If we write clearly, the boss might actually understand what we wrote.  And it might be wrong, or different from what the boss wanted.  Safety is everything.

        • Gulliver says:

          Not necessarily. I graded clarity at employee evaluations because writing intentionally obfuscatory memos wastes company time, lowers worker morale and seriously pisses the boss (me) off.

  3. sammyf says:

    First I was going “Yes!”, then I read the comments on the side, and went “man!”

  4. Joe DiMaggio says:

    It’s about time that these guys got some competition: huhcorp.com

  5. Steve White says:

    I expect a cease and desist letter from MerderPhuck Consultants at any minute. 

  6. awjt says:

    It’s only a matter of time before the Rise of the Necros.

  7. Johnny Farnen says:

    By utilizing Murderfuck’s services, we were able to expand our culture of paradigm rejection and increase our profits in distributing for these guys:

    http://www.alliedchemical.com/products/index.html

  8. CHilke says:

    formerly Goldman Sachs

  9. Over the River says:

    Murderfuck was established in 1995 by communications magnate Walter Q. Pistachio. Though he passed away in 2001 from bear-related complications, Murderfuck has carried on his proud legacy of innovation and directed leadership.

    That will do it every time.

  10. I need to update my resume anyways. . .  maybe i should put a fake entry down the list saying I worked for Murderfuck, just to see if anyone is paying attention.

  11. JhmL says:

    This is the one where Patrick Bateman works?

  12. Brood-X says:

    Schwag?

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