Two Americans arrested in international narwhal smuggling ring

Okay, which of you all just got busted for smuggling narwhal tusks? Fess up. It was either one of you, somebody from Reddit, or both, right?

Image: N is for narwhal - finished, a Creative Commons Attribution (2.0) image from notahipster's photostream

Maggie Koerth-Baker is the science editor at BoingBoing.net. She writes a monthly column for The New York Times Magazine and is the author of Before the Lights Go Out, a book about electricity, infrastructure, and the future of energy. You can find Maggie on Twitter and Facebook.

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MORE: animals • black market • crime • endangered species • narwhals • Science • smuggling

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The Snowden Principle

Arthur Delaney

Redditors love narwhals, they would never kill them for tusks. Gotta be digg.
OldBrownSquirrel

People who hunt narwhals are sea-unicorn chasers?
- Antinous / Moderator
  
  I don’t know; why don’t you goa tse?
Nagurski

This is a serious problem for animals that most likely deserve a ‘threatened’ listing.
- zuludaddy
  
  Narwhals were never overfished – too small, and only live above the arctic circle…
  - http://pulse.yahoo.com/_BOOM27DBLMZQIJVK4BQLE7K5YA Nagurski
    
    If overfishing were the only threat to their survival you’d have a point. Their small range, preferred diet and habitat and other factors put them in a very precarious position. They will very likely be listed as threatened in the next few years.
    - zuludaddy
      
      Yes, they are covered by CITES, so they are considered to be “endangered species” in legal terms, at least.
http://www.youtube.com/user/Freethinkersanon Christopher

It wasn’t me. I learned my lesson when I was busted for selling artificial powdered Barry Manilow nose to aliens as an aphrodisiac.
PhosPhorious

That is NOT a narwhal in my pocket. I’m just happy to see you.
Stay_Sane_Inside_Insanity

Well, you can’t say “predator” without saying “redditor.”
sam1148

If I had a Narwhal I’d call him Andy. Andy Narwhal.
http://twitter.com/james4765 Jim Nelson

Nah, it’d only be a redditor if there was bacon involved.

And time constraints.
zuludaddy

I have two (very legal) narwhal tusks.
http://billmcgonigle.com bill_mcgonigle

So who will be the first to hook up a LulzBot to an adjustable-height table with an arduino and start cranking out printable tusks?
http://profiles.google.com/steve.nordquist Steve Nordquist

How could a ring of teeth not involve a series of tubes? Sure you could open an airport bar with a narwhal theme and try to grow them from seed tissue, occasionally making toothpaste ads (is freezing saltwater brine making your teeth…sparkly purple? Well, we have the thing) but there’s no guaranteeing you make luxist regularly. FWIW: So, the USA has them on the Endangered list, just yet, and that’s why the trade was a crime.
Sparg

Narwhals, they stop Cthulhu eating ye.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykwqXuMP