Two Americans arrested in international narwhal smuggling ring

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16 Responses to “Two Americans arrested in international narwhal smuggling ring”

  1. Arthur Delaney says:

    Redditors love narwhals, they would never kill them for tusks. Gotta be digg.

  2. OldBrownSquirrel says:

    People who hunt narwhals are sea-unicorn chasers?

  3. Nagurski says:

    This is a serious problem for animals that most likely deserve a  ‘threatened’ listing.

    • zuludaddy says:

      Narwhals were never overfished – too small, and only live above the arctic circle…

      • Nagurski says:

         If overfishing were the only threat to their survival you’d have a point. Their small range, preferred diet and habitat and other factors put them in a very precarious position. They will very likely be listed as threatened in the next few years.

  4. Christopher says:

    It wasn’t me. I learned my lesson when I was busted for selling artificial powdered Barry Manilow nose to aliens as an aphrodisiac. 

  5. PhosPhorious says:

    That is NOT a narwhal in my pocket.  I’m just happy to see you.

  6. Stay_Sane_Inside_Insanity says:

    Well, you can’t say “predator” without saying “redditor.” 

  7. sam1148 says:

    If I had a Narwhal I’d call him Andy. Andy Narwhal. 

  8. Jim Nelson says:

    Nah, it’d only be a redditor if there was bacon involved.

    And time constraints.

  9. zuludaddy says:

    I have two (very legal) narwhal tusks. 

  10. So who will be the first to hook up a LulzBot to an adjustable-height table with an arduino and start cranking out printable tusks?

  11. How could a ring of teeth not involve a series of tubes? Sure you could open an airport bar with a narwhal theme and try to grow them from seed tissue, occasionally making toothpaste ads (is freezing saltwater brine making your teeth…sparkly purple? Well, we have the thing) but there’s no guaranteeing you make luxist regularly. FWIW: So, the USA has them on the Endangered list, just yet, and that’s why the trade was a crime.

  12. Sparg says:

    Narwhals, they stop Cthulhu eating ye.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykwqXuMP

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