I work in academic biomedical research (my last job was spending 3 years investigating drug actions, working with big pharma), and I don’t think there is any problem with “natural remedies.”  I have a big problem with faith-based medicine, where people refuse to have their belief in the remedies challenged.  But if you properly test it, and it still works, voila! Medicine advances, and we can all benefit.

Most adults learn how to administer effective doses of caffeine, alcohol and other interesting substances without a doctor’s advice: why not geranium oil? All we need to do is put the idea to the test to see if it stands up.

All that being said, I don’t disclose oral herpes before kissing, because, fuck’s sakes, so many people have it that I think you just have to assume.

If you have herpes, and if you want to go the mainstream-medicine route, Valtrex is very effective for a lot of people. You can take it daily if you have regular outbreaks, or episodically if you don’t. Generic is now available.

Also, handy news (no pun intended), gloves and condoms can be cut to use as dental dams. Makes those flavored rubbers in the variety packs extra useful :)

I feel if barriers are looked at as another type of sex toy, that also reduces worry, then it takes cloud of “chore” out of it.

Correlation doesn’t prove causation, but it’s a good starting point. OP tried something, it seems to work, she’s helpfully sharing information. You’re not being helpful, you’re just shitting all over that contribution, and I don’t think you ought to do that without some evidence.

http://www.animated-teeth.com/canker_sores/t5-canker-sores-herpes.htm

That you can’t know you don’t have it does not mean you can’t necessarily know you do.

Disclosing an infectious *anything* is a morally sound, respectful choice. I never said other people shouldn’t take any responsibility. The question was, if I’m positive, should I disclose. The answer is yes.

If the question is “I’m negative, should I ask?” the answer is… wait for it… ALSO YES.

Anyway, you misunderstand me. I’m a huge fan of disclosure. My problem was that you seemed to think people have a “right” not to get a disease that most people acquire in childhood. You don’t have the right not to get any disease; that’s not a right. If you’re concerned about contracting something, you take steps to avoid contracting it. It is not a violation of someone’s human rights not to disclose. In my opinion, it’s still wrong. It’s just not a rights violation.

Your language itself was stigmatizing, because I can’t imagine anyone ever saying they had a right not to catch a cold or the flu. You’re thinking of this as an STI and therefore different – which is stigmatizing. All by itself.

The parallel is not a magic tiger-repellent rock that keeps tigers away from where they never existed to begin with, the parallel is a fence and rifle that keep tigers out of an area where they were previously rampant.

My high school education was very good; I was well grounded in the history of science as well as the sciences themselves.  Going to prep schools in the mid-60′s, I benefited from strong new math and science curricula created at the time to compete with the Soviets (they got Sputnik up first! we used to sit out in the summer nights and watch it blink over head, whilst our grandfather ranted about the Communists…fun times!) 

I was headed for a career as a marine biologist when I got side-tracked by what seemed to me the more ‘relevant’ issues of the inequities of the Viet Nam war, segregation, the awful Summer of ’68, then Woodstock…never made it back to the labs.  But have always read and studied on my own.

Am bewildered by the shallow draft of knowledge exemplified by C W’s snarky remarks.  It seems very regressive.

Have just posted a minor epic in response to ‘Horus’. 

Be well!

I am in my seventh decade now, so that means I have dealt with the ‘wicked herp’ for at least 50 years.  We will pass over gently the many ‘scientific’ remedies offered by pediatricians and physicians in my earlier years.  When I became interested in being responsible for my own health and that of my infant children, I discovered other theoretical models for healing.  I experimented on myself and was very happy to come up with the remedies I mentioned above.

Even with the cancer pain and all, I still minimize my intake of pharmaceuticals…oh, I haven’t really said why…it’s the SIDE EFFECTS. 
I nursed grandparents, parents, in-laws and husband as they lived and died, mostly of cancers. 
One of the most insidious of practices is when the patient starts being medicated for the side effects of the drugs given for the side effects of the drug treating the main medical issue.

Having seen that so often and so up close, I refuse to do it to myself. (And note that verb is in the active rather than passive voice.)
It is an on-going effort and I am grateful that I have access to practitioners who are trained in other traditions, other sources of wisdom, than the rambunctious upstart that is western medical science.

I am the boss of me.  I engage a physician as I would a mechanic if I owned a fine fine automobile. 

Now, I expect that in your life time, and maybe even in what remains of mine, the  explosion of new tech, perhaps especially the 3-D printers, is going to mean huge strides in creating more effective and less toxic meds. 
Even now, I am fortunate to be treated for my cancer with a monoclonal antibody, rather than the chemical cocktail that was standard five years ago.

I offer this longer narrative, as elders tend to do. 
Rejoice in good health and be very wary of ‘scientific medicine’.  They are very good at diagnosis, great at mechanical repairs.  It is when they are faced with the mysterious malfunctions of organs and blood and cells that can’t be seen that things can go awry. 

Listen to Xeni; she knows the score.

Maybe it’s a placebo effect, but sometimes, even if we don’t yet know why, natural remedies work. Take aspirin, for instance – willow bark was used in ancient Egypt, ancient Greece and during Europe’s Middle Ages to treat ‘fever, pain and inflammation’, but the active ingredient salicin (a close relative of Asprin’s man-made acetylsalicylic acid) wasn’t known until the 19th century, and the reason it worked not known until the mid 20th. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/History_of_aspirin

After the second or third time I was misdiagnosed I stopped trusting anyone but myself to make decisions about my health.  This has resulted in my continued existence.

That has nothing to do with HSV1. It is not part of the normal STD battery.

Previously it was an actual herp.

I get tested for STDs every 56 days.

*shakes head* There is a certain amount of personal responsibility that is being disregarded on both sides here. Yes, disclosure is good on both sides. The extent though, especially if people don’t care enough about their own personal safety to ask? It’s not all on the poz’s end.

A responsible person would then assume that they DO have it versus throwing a fit when statistics discuss the extreme commonality/ease of transmission and likelihood that many people do not express symptoms or have outbreaks. If you seriously cared, you’d be tested for it as well. That you’re guessing is answer enough.

Infecting everyone with it would de-stigmatize it, but surely you wouldn’t argue for that. I hope.

That people may then opt not to kiss you does not in and of itself stigmatize the disease. It’s a choice people most certainly do have the right to make for themselves.