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Titanium multitool ring with five tools

Cory Doctorow at 8:52 am Wed, Jan 30, 2013

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Etsy seller boonerings has a $385 titanium "utility ring" with five in-built tools: "a working bottle opener, a straight blade perfect for cutting packing tape or fishing line, a serrated blade for tougher things like nylon strapping or those tough to open electronics heat sealed packages, a saw for cutting plastic and wood, and it has a comb" (the comb is recommended primarily for mustaches.

The Man Ring: Titanium Utility Ring (via OhGizmo)

I write books. My latest is a YA science fiction novel called Homeland (it's the sequel to Little Brother). More books: Rapture of the Nerds (a novel, with Charlie Stross); With a Little Help (short stories); and The Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow (novella and nonfic). I speak all over the place and I tweet and tumble, too.

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  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=723148341 Lucy Gothro

    The comb could also be used for eyelashes.  I’d like to see a feminine version.  

    • Donald Petersen

      Do eyelashes require combing?

      • Antinous / Moderator

        If they have lice in them.

  • slagmacg

    I’m sure that the TSA folks will love it

    • oasisob1

      They’ll never notice it. They are far too busy looking for water bottles, laughing at images on the pornoscanner and harassing non-terrorists.

  • http://twitter.com/jmck John McKenzie

    titanium is a poor choice of metal to clamp around a digit

    • http://twitter.com/metal_max Max Allan

      Why? I had a titanium wedding band. Inlaid with silver strips. (I still do have it, I just don’t wear it since I got divorced)
      It was light and metallic, everything a ring should be. Didn’t tarnish, didn’t corrode onto my finger etc.

      • me me

        my fiance is an emergency dept doc.  she won’t let anyone buy titanium rings as they can’t be cut off easily in case of emergency.  especially avoid the titanium cock rings, apparently.

        • Bevatron Repairman

          To coin a phrase, “Oh, my.”

        • nowimnothing

          I can see that, but every gold or silver ring I ever had ended up misshapen after just a year or two. My titanium one is perfect after 10 1/2 years.

          • me me

            as long as you are able take that thing off asap after an accident, you’ll be fine. 

          • Antinous / Moderator

            As long as you don’t mind ending up with Frodo for a nickname.

        • dculberson

          Maybe she should look into it a little more before spreading it around:

          http://www.snopes.com/weddings/horrors/titanium.asp

          Takeaway: Titanium is not significantly harder to saw through than steel.  Yes, it’s harder than gold, but it’s still possible to cut it off.

          • me me

            we weren’t talking about steel.  aerospace titanium, near impossible according to the link.  regular titanium requires 2 cuts to cut it off.  be my guest to put your digits or other parts in harms way.

          • Donald Petersen

            “Near impossible according to the link”?  According to the link:

            One could still be cut loose from it, but the process would be a bit more involved.

            Not saying I’d recommend aerospace grade titanium rings any more than you would.  Just saying you might be exaggerating a bit.

        • jlbraun

          “they can’t be cut off easily”

          Myth.  Titanium is quite ductile and cuts easily.

    • http://theladyfingers.blogspot.com/ Ladyfingers

       On the flip side of this argument, a wide titanium ring could save your fingers from a slam.

      • Antinous / Moderator

        Isn’t titanium on the brittle side?

        • http://theladyfingers.blogspot.com/ Ladyfingers

           Actually no, very much the opposite.

          It’s pretty remarkable in that it flexes without fatigue. I recall a titanium bicycle frame a few years ago that had a centimetre or two of elastomer placed in the junction between the seatstays and seatpost, and no mechanical hinge on the chainstays. The manufacturers were confident metal fatigue would not be an issue.

  • CSBD

    Getting caught by some TSA mouth breather with this sort of “tool” is probably proof enough for them that you are terrorist and that you are volunteering for a whole lot of goatse-esque cavity searches etc.  Now that they have gotten rid of the porno scanners… they are left only with suspicions and rubber gloves to protect liberty and freedom from the terrorists.

    • EH

      Not everyone has accepted their TSA fate so readily.

    • jandrese

      They only got rid of one brand of Pronoscanner, there are still others.  Depends which brand your airport bought. 

      My complaint with this product is that all of the tools are small enough to be annoying to use.  Cutting packing tape is fine, but for almost anything else it’s going to be awkward.  Even sharpening a knife that small (which you will have to do a lot because Titanium doesn’t hold an edge as well as carbon steel) is difficult, especially with the huge ring part getting in the way. 

      How often are you going to be asked to saw through a pencil in your lifetime? 

      • David Pawlyk

        No complaints about the $385 price tag?

        • EH

          and such small portions, too

        • jandrese

          That kind of goes without saying.

          • David Pawlyk

            The impracticality of the tools goes without saying as well.

        • http://devojane.blogspot.com devophill

          I don’t have too much of a problem with that. If this guy is still doing stuff like he did ten years ago, he’s making these ring himself. He has a CNC machine, and in many cases he makes rings to order. I love my titanium wedding band!

  • http://www.facebook.com/bhcabral Bruno H. Cabral

    Why would they include a bottle opener if you can easily improvise one with a non-utility-ring?

    • EH

      Or your teeth. Man, what a bunch of simps.

      • Antinous / Moderator

        Teeth? I guess that you haven’t been doing your Kegels.

  • http://www.matthewpetty.com/ Matthew Petty

    Men only

  • http://twitter.com/mr_raccoon Jason

    pretty much

  • Jen Onymous

    I like this a lot, but also see how this can make False Authority Figures panic.

    It also reminds me quite a lot of these:

    http://handytwineknife.com/index.php

    My late Grandfather had one–he worked as a deliveryman. I take it that wearing one of these within the same zip code as an airport would get you arrested now.

  • pjcamp

    Mustache comb — that’s about three feet further up than I was thinking.