Monopoly piece contest: kitty in, iron out

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31 Responses to “Monopoly piece contest: kitty in, iron out”

  1. Mike Robinson says:

    Damn it Reddit! Enough with the cats!

  2. allotrope says:

    I can haz get-out-of-jail-tree card? the cat wondered as it contemplated the barking Scottie dog beneath it.

  3. Stefan Jones says:

    Brilliant way to sell more copies of a uninspired game that almost everyone has a copy of already.

    I think we need “Settlers of CATtan,” in which the roads are little carved pieces of yarn, and the buildings are cat scratching posts.

    • Antinous / Moderator says:

      How about Settlers of Caftan, in which all the players are late-middle-aged gay men and every playing piece is a cat?

      • Stooge says:

        …number 138 in an occasional series of Antinoid solipsistic reveries.

      • Frank Lee Scarlett says:

        Huh. I envisioned Settlers of Caftan as a brutal, but romantic, ornately decorated, onion-domed world of paranoid, epicurean, aristocratic Russian libertines of the pre-19th Century era. Traditional Russian aristocrats loved their caftans. And their muzhelozhstvo (men lying with men).

        Your version would, of course, have to include a late middle-aged version of Shelley Winters and her wardrobe of 12 fabulously swooshy psychedelic caftans. Including the one in which she performed her Olympic-length Swan Swim in the waterlogged Poseidon.

  4. oldtaku says:

    The robot was so, so, much cooler. But if you ask the internet you’re going to get cats. Or porn.

    • Rich Keller says:

      I think you’re on to something. Monopoly pieces could be made from Kama Sutra poses. “Damn it! Why do you always get to be reverse cowgirl?”

  5. m0nkyman says:

    Boo. I always picked the iron, and proudly announced that I was going to flatten everyone else. 

  6. Alex Riepl says:

    Great. I knew they were going to get rid of my piece. I love the iron if only because of its charm and subtle menance (a hot iron is nothing to trifle with).

    I might be more bummed out if there weren’t nowadays a massive proliferation of far better board games to choose from (Agricola, Ticket to Ride, Thurn and Taxis, Dominion, Few Acres of Snow, and yes Settlers of Catan).

    I don’t know that I’ll ever be desperate enough to buy Monopoly these days.

  7. Stefan Jones says:

    Coming up next:

    Vote for which weapon will be replaced in CLUE.

    I want to see the Lead Pipe replaced with a Chainsaw.

    (Or a cat. Cats are underrated as murder weapons. And including a cat will sell thousands of copies to obsessive-completist cat fanciers.)

  8. 10xor01 says:

    Now just replace the wheelbarrow with a cheezburger, and internet kittehs will want to play.

  9. Ari B. says:

    I can’t haz iron?

  10. Senor Schaffer says:

    THERE WAS A ROBOT AND IT DIDN’T WIN?!? 

    FUCK

    THAT

    SHIT!!!

    • bzishi says:

      It wasn’t just a robot. It was a robot with a ‘stache! Apparently that was enough for it to cross over into the uncanny valley.

  11. gwailo_joe says:

    I am disappointed with this: what about the stupid thimble?!  A blatant symbol of female oppression by the Patriarchy if there ever was one!

    And not even a real thimble!  The iron was useful (theoretically)…  

    While the Scottie dog looks straight ahead at Art Deco attention; its new Nemesis strikes a fey pose…with Monopoly branding.  How…sweet.

    It’s a Travesty I tell you!  I am now going outside to shout random imprecations…

  12. Nash Rambler says:

    “You hear that iron?  Nobody likes you!  Nobody!  Now get out and stay out!”Of course, the iron grew up, became a major player on Wall Street, bought Parker Bros., dismantled the company and FIRED EVERYBODY.

  13. chgoliz says:

    I blame 4chan.

  14. dculberson says:

    From my hot, burnt hands!

  15. Fundamentally, Monopoly was never INTENDED to be a fun game.  Instead “the landlord game” was intended to teach Georgist economics.  If everybody but winner is forced to continue to play for a long time in ever growing poverty and boredom while the leader amasses ever more money and resources…well that’s kind of the whole POINT.

  16. Kent says:

    nice cat though.)

  17. Works for me.

    Dogs and cats make people happy. The thought of ironing, on the other hand….

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