Mark Frauenfelder at 10:43 am Thu, Mar 7, 2013
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"The Tribune followed up this story on the very next page with one on how the English aristocracy was turning into gorillas."
Mars peopled by one vast thinking vegetable!
“Peopled by vegetables.”
The awesomest thing ever said.
I bet at one time there was a tabloid on Mars proclaiming that Earth was vegetated by people.
They started out as people and then a horrific bacteria came along..
And that wasn’t written by Isaac Asimov – amazing!
And here I was thinking Episode 23, Season 3 of “Lost In Space” was a bad idea.
As an avid “Lost In Space” addict as a kid I’m astounded that I don’t think I ever saw that episode, but reading the description of it in Wikipedia…what part of that episode wasn’t an amazingly hilarious good idea? The Robot’s birthday? A purple-haired botanist? Doctor Smith turned into celery?
Oh the pain, the pain of it all..
Coincidentally enough, that’s about the only episode I remember seeing. Smith moaning, “Moisture!” over and over again.
The Great Vegetable Rebellion was LIS’s apotheosis.
That is very Stapledonian.
“The Tribune followed up this story on the very next page with one on how the English aristocracy was turning into gorillas.”And isn’t it funny so many years later, that we discover both stories were true?!
The kitchen staff had better put the silver back if they don’t want to deal with the silverback.
The second awesomest thin g ever said.
Wait, I thought they were reptiles?
(I looked, and am very surprised and disappointed D&D has no reptilian gorillas. What? A friggin OWL-BEAR is a viable critter and this isn’t?)
Isn’t that one of the Denarians?
And they didn’t post the gorilla one? I wanna see the gorilla one!
Someone left an “e” out of “neighboring planet” and they just ran with the story. Punched it up a bit.
Are you saying that Mars is a nigh-boring planet?
Immediately thought of Le Guin’s “Vaster than Empires and More Slow.”
No hi-res scan to read through. :-(
Here’s the hi-res scan:
Well, one out of two ain’t bad…
This issue of the Trib could have been from last week.
“american political system peopled by one vast vegetable” (sadly, not a “thinking,” vegetable)
So long as they give this equal time, alongside so-called “lifeless red planet” theories in the classroom, I will be satisfied.
Teach the controversy!
I find this to be more plausible than creationism. At least there’s that.
No wonder newspapers are failing; they aren’t running real journalism like this anymore. I’d pay for a print subscription to this fine publication.
Yes, journalism has been going downhill ever since the Weekly World News stopped publication.
Vegetables confirmed to be ghosts of deceased mormon men and their wives. Mars deigned Celestial Realm!
… torn between commenting about how mushrooms are just the visible part of a much larger underground body vs. breaking into a chorus of “Mean Green Mother From Outer Space!” …
I recommend reading the article in Richard Burton’s voice.
Oh no. No, you mustn’t. Mars is changing, and Mars is not changing for me, Mars hasn’t changed for me in years. If Mars is changing, that means we’re going to be here for days.
When the order for that particular “artist’s conception” filtered down to the Art Department, I imagine the resulting joyous whoop could be heard clear down by the presses. Looks like someone had themselves an uncommonly good time.
Does that mean the angel Moroni came from Mars?
“Mars peopled by one vast thinking vegetable!”
– What do vegetables think about?
The Thing From Another World wanted to conquer Earth.
I’d wager this planet-wide vegetable is casting its baleful gaze in a similar direction.
Clark Ashton Smith — “Seedling of Mars”.
Fuck the story, that letter ‘g’ is gorgeous.
Eyeball creatures, vegetable people and ape transformation are quite genuinely the plots to three different episodes of the tv series Garth Marenghi’s Dark Place.
Giant celery with an eyeball on top — about the most whackadoodle newspaper illustration I’ve ever seen.
Sounds more like corporate America.
Oddly, I am currently reading Iain M Banks’s “Against a Dark Background” and the protagonists are on a planet covered by a single giant vegetable. Synchronicity!
“I for one welcome our new giant-eyeball-atop-a-celery-stalk-space-elevator overlord.”
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Who will be eaten first?